Gentle/Positive Discipline Books

[GCM_Sticky]

Please share your favorite gentle/positive discipline book. Also, feel free to post a review of any of the books listed below. :-) Thank you to everyone who has contributed to this list. :heart

A-C

Bailey, Becky - Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline (http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FEasy-Love-Difficult-Discipline-Cooperation%2Fdp%2F0060007753%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3Dbo oks%26qid%3D1183534198%26sr%3D1-1&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=ur2&o=1%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%20bo rder=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:none%2 0%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;%22 (See past discussions (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/showthread.php?t=438058)about this book.)
Budd, Linda - Living With the Active Alert Child: Groundbreaking Strategies for Parents (http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FLiving-Active-Alert-Child-Groundbreaking%2Fdp%2F1884734774%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3 Dbooks%26qid%3D1183534806%26sr%3D1-2&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=ur2&o=1%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%20bo rder=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:none%2 0%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;%22
Chou, Grace P. - Disciplining Children with Confidence (http://www.amazon.com/Disciplining-Children-Confidence-Grace-Chou/dp/1553061284/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594393&sr=1-1)
Clark, Jean Illsley - Self-Esteem: A Family Affair (http://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Family-Jean-Illsley-Clarke/dp/1568382871/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183595779&sr=1-1) and Time-In: When Time-Out Doesn't Work (http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FTime-When-Time-Out-Doesnt-Work%2Fdp%2F1884734286%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3Dbooks%26q id%3D1183534969%26sr%3D1-1&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=ur2&o=1%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%20bo rder=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:none%2 0%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;%22
Clarkson, Clay - Heartfelt Discipline: The Gentle Art of Training and Guiding Your Child (http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FHeartfelt-Discipline-Gentle-Training-Guiding%2Fdp%2F1578565839%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3Dbooks% 26qid%3D1183535599%26sr%3D1-1&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=ur2&o=1%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%20bo rder=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:none%2 0%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;%22
Clarkson, Sally - The Ministry of Motherhood: Following Christ's Example in Reaching the Hearts of Our Children (http://www.amazon.com/Ministry-Motherhood-Following-Reaching-Children/dp/1578565820/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_b/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183594229&sr=1-2)
Cohen, Lawerence - Playful Parenting (http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FPlayful-Parenting-Lawrence-J-Cohen%2Fdp%2F0345442865%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3Dbooks%26 qid%3D1183535745%26sr%3D1-1&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=ur2&o=1%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%20bo rder=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:none%2 0%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;%22
Colorosa, Barbara - Kids Are Worth It (http://www.amazon.com/kids-are-worth-Revised-Harperresource/dp/0060014318/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594623&sr=1-1)
Crary, Elizabeth - Dealing With Disappointment (http://www.amazon.com/Dealing-Disappointment-Helping-Things-Their/dp/1884734758/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596394&sr=1-1)

D-F

Faber, Adele and Elaine Mazlich -How To Talk So Your Kids Will Listen and Listen So Your Kids Will Talk (http://www.amazon.com/Talk-Kids-Will-Listen-Child/dp/1853407054/ref=pd_bbs_2/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594623&sr=1-2) and Sliblings Without Rivalry (http://www.amazon.com/Siblings-Without-Rivalry-Children-Together/dp/0380799006/ref=pd_sim_b_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183594623&sr=1-2)
Flower, Hillary - Adventures in Gentle Discipline (http://www.amazon.com/ADVENTURES-GENTLE-DISCIPLINE-Parent-Parent/dp/0976896907/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594819&sr=1-1)

G-K

Gordon, Thomas - Parent Effectiveness Training: The Proven Program for Raising Responsible Children (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0609806939?ie=UTF8&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0609806939)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=as2&o=1&a=0609806939%22%20width=%221%22%20height=%221%22%2 0border=%220%22%20alt=%22%22%20style=%22border:non e%20%21important;%20margin:0px%20%21important;
Kimmel, Tim - Grace-Based Parenting (http://www.amazon.com/Grace-Based-Parenting-Tim-Kimmel/dp/0849905486/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_b/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183593933&sr=1-1)
Kurcinka, Mary Sheedy - Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles (http://www.amazon.com/Kids-Parents-Power-Struggles-Lifetime/dp/0060930438/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594901&sr=1-1) and Raising Your Spirited Child (http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Rev/dp/0060739665/ref=pd_sim_b_3/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183594901&sr=1-1)

L-P

Lutton, Crystal - Biblical Parenting (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/193058668X/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=gentlechristi-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creative=399369&creativeASIN=193058668X%22)http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=gentlechristi-20&l=as2&o=1&a=193058668X&camp=217145&creative=399369 and Grace-Based Living (http://aolff.com/?page_id=87).
McKay, Matthew - When Anger Hurts Your Kids (http://www.amazon.com/When-Anger-Hurts-Your-Kids/dp/156731208X/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183595422&sr=1-1)
Nelsen, Jane - all Positive Discipline (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/104-8594005-9741551?%5Fencoding=UTF8&search-type=ss&index=books&field-author=Jane%20Ed.D.%20Nelsen) books (note: the ones for younger children are not AP), and Jodi's fav Positive Discipline A to Z (http://www.amazon.com/o/ASIN/0307345572/ref=s9_asin_title_1-1966_g1/104-8594005-9741551?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-1&pf_rd_r=0V4Z92D0B3ZTJ5225D1Z&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=278240701&pf_rd_i=507846)
Neufeld, Gordon and Gabor Mate - Hold On To Your Kids (http://www.amazon.com/Hold-Your-Kids-Parents-Matter/dp/0375760288/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183595540&sr=1-1) - jujubnme says, "He talks about parent-orientation vs. peer-orientation. Very insightful, and good information on parenting from connection. Although it applies for all ages, it's an excellent resource for parents of school-aged kids."
Pantley, Elizabeth - Kid Cooperation: How to Stop Yelling, Nagging & Pleading and Get Kids to Cooperate (http://www.amazon.com/Kid-Cooperation-Yelling-Pleading-Cooperate/dp/1572240407/ref=pd_sim_b_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183595047&sr=1-1) - kauaidee says, "She does recommend time outs but I found overall her discipline style very gentle. It is one of the most practical books I've read which is what I need right now. I feel like I've got the concept of GBD down but I need ideas and this one gave me lots. Plus she also had a chapter on dealing with anger as a parent which is something I struggle with."; The No-Cry Discipline Solution (http://www.amazon.com/No-Cry-Discipline-Solution-Encourage-Behavior/dp/0071471596/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183595047&sr=1-1); and Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips (http://www.amazon.com/Perfect-Parenting-Elizabeth-Pantley/dp/0809228475/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_b/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183595047&sr=1-1)

Q-T

Sears, William - The Discipline Book (http://www.amazon.com/Discipline-Book-Better-Behaved-Child-Birth/dp/0316779032/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596496&sr=1-1) and The Successful Child (http://www.amazon.com/Successful-Child-Parents-Parenting-Library/dp/B000KJTOT4/ref=pd_sim_b_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&qid=1183596496&sr=1-1)
Tobias, Cynthia Ulrich - You Can’t Make Me But I Can Be Persuaded (http://www.amazon.com/You-Cant-Make-Persuaded-Strong-Willed/dp/1578561930/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596746&sr=1-1)
Turansky, Scott and Joanne Miller - Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining and Bad Attitudes...in You and Your Kids (http://www.amazon.com/Goodbye-Whining-Complaining-Attitudes-Your/dp/0877883548/ref=sr_1_2/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596638&sr=1-2)

U-Z

Whitehurst, Teresa - Jesus on Parenting (http://www.amazon.com/Jesus-Parenting-Essential-Principles-Transform/dp/0801065291/ref=sr_1_2/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183594229&sr=1-2)
Wyckoff, Jerry and Barbara C. Unell - Discipline Without Shouting or Spanking (http://www.amazon.com/Discipline-Without-Shouting-Spanking-Practical/dp/0743228545/ref=pd_bbs_2/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596219&sr=1-2)

Not discipline but awesome for every parent:

DeBecker, Gavin - Protecting the Gift (http://www.amazon.com/Protecting-Gift-Keeping-Children-Teenagers/dp/0440509009/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596922&sr=1-1)
Cloud, Henry and John Townsend - Boundaries (http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Inspirio-Zondervan-Miniature-Editions/dp/0762421029/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596847&sr=1-1) - cornflower says, "I've heard that Boundaries with Kids is punitive, though, so perhaps stay away from it."
VanVonderen, Jeff - Families Where Grace is in Place (http://www.amazon.com/Families-Where-Grace-Place-VanVonderen/dp/1556612664/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183596114&sr=1-1)

For kids:

Bang, Molly - When Sophie Gets Angry--Really, Really Angry... (http://www.amazon.com/When-Sophie-Angry-Really-Really-Angry/dp/0439924936/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183597153&sr=1-1)
Fox, Mem - Harriet You'll Drive Me Wild! (http://www.amazon.com/Harriet-Youll-Drive-Me-Wild/dp/0152045988/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183597332&sr=1-1) - ShangriLewis says, "It's about a mom who yells after having a lot of patience with a normal little girl, and then they have a big pillow fight. I'm not sure if everyone would like that or not. But, it was good for us because yelling is my downfall. I read that one and the Molly Bang one everynight for Porter for almost 2 years. He loved those books and they were good for me, too."
Joose, Barbara M. - Mama, Do You Love Me? (http://www.amazon.com/Mama-Do-You-Love-Me/dp/9993621242/ref=sr_1_1/104-8594005-9741551?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183597253&sr=1-1) - jujubnme says, "A little Native Alaskan girl asks her mother if she loves her and quizzes her about a bunch of 'what if' situations--one of my favorites: 'What if I put salmon in your parka, ermine in your mittens and lemmings in your mukluks?' The mother answers 'I would be angry [or surprised, worried, etc. in other scenarios]. But still I would love you.' It's very sweet and Julius liked all the arctic animals."

[katiekind]

I would add:

Campbell, Ross - How to Really Love Your Child (http://www.amazon.com/How-Really-Love-Your-Child/dp/0896930661)

[lmd0137]

Thanks so much. It is really great to find a list of resources.

[BriansLovie]

I would like to recommend "Discipline Without Distress: 135 tools for raising caring, responsible children without time-out, spanking, punishment or bribery" by Judy Arnall

[mezzBreath]

anyone know about "parenting is heart work"?

[daughteroftheking3]

This list is so helpful! I have been hunting for some good books on gentle discipline!

[mrsd]

Thank you for posting such a complete and well researched list. :cool

[sweetpeas]

anyone know about "parenting is heart work"?

I don't have the book, but I have the CD set and it has helped me SOO much! It's essentially a "prequel" to "Say Goodbye to Whining . . ."

[Amahoro]

I would like to recommend Pinky McKay. An Australian IBCLC and 'go to' woman on all gentle parenting concepts.

Her books include Parenting By Heart, Toddler Tactics, Sleeping like a Baby and 100 Ways to Calm the Crying.

She also has a lovely Facebook page & website & has occasional free teleseminars on parenting topics (sleep, breastfeeding, early days, discipline, toddler issues etc) and I have found them incredibly helpful.

She also has a 'mummy mentoring' program you can subscribe to in order to get more personal assistance.

I just love her!

[Denee]

Pinky McKay. I will def. look her up on facebook. Thank you!

---------- Post added at 04:49 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:44 PM ----------

I agree!!! yay!!! I'm so glad I found this page.

[Denee]

Does anyone have a review on any of the above books? Which ones have really helped you? Which would you recommend? I ordered a few on amazon and was wondering if I should get more based on what has helped others.

[juliew]

I would highly recommend How to Really Love Your Child, by Ross Campbell. It really shaped my thinking when I first read it years ago.

[R7blessings]

I wanted to add my favorite--

Listening to Children series by Patty Wipfler at Hand in Hand Parenting Website--- Awesome!!
If you could just have 2 books--- I would say .....
1. Listening to Children Series of booklets by Patty Wipfler
2. Connection Parenting by Pam Leo

[amber.pt]

I'm so glad many of these are available at our local library!

[triscuit]

I've started reading Unconditional Parenting (http://www.amazon.com/Unconditional-Parenting-Moving-Rewards-Punishments/dp/0743487486/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1338180809&sr=8-1) by Alfie Kohn. Anyone else read it, what did you think? I really, really like it so far! :)

[bentlaj11]

NAK..

i read it when ds1 was still a baby as a rec from an ap board. it has a chapter on religion that is very anti-christian (if i remember correctly), but i knew that if one could parent that way, then there had to be a biblical basis.... it just made so much sense! It (along with a couple of other PD books and the internet) led me to GBD!! Praise the Lord!!!

[triscuit]

Ok, I'll keep an eye out for that. Thanks!

[triscuit]

it has a chapter on religion that is very anti-christian (if i remember correctly), Hmm... well I just finished it last night :) I only came across what amount to about a 1 pg paragraph on religion so it's not too much to quickly bypass if anyone is interested in reading this book. I really enjoyed it! :)

[bentlaj11]

Hmm... well I just finished it last night :) I only came across what amount to about a 1 pg paragraph on religion so it's not too much to quickly bypass if anyone is interested in reading this book. I really enjoyed it! :)

I couldn't remember how much of it was.. I do remember just "ignoring" that section. It really opened my eyes to a lot of things when I was looking into gentle discipline (before I learned about GBD). It really helped me see that how I was brought up (punitively, but in love) affected me to this day. It gave me a lot to think about for sure!

[Shutterbug]

anyone know about "parenting is heart work"?

I was curious if anyone here had read this as well.

[Miriama]

I did read it and it helped me very much.
I had some of the concepts before but some we're very enlightening. And I love his style of sharing things.
If I remember well some stuff was a little extreme for me, but I couldn't name it.
>>"I've started reading Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn. Anyone else read it, what did you think? I really, really like it so far!

[On Fire]

[QUOTE=Amahoro;4086752]I would like to recommend Pinky McKay. An Australian IBCLC and 'go to' woman on all gentle parenting concepts.
QUOTE]


+ Christian Author (though the book's not) L.R.Knost 'Two-thousand kisses a Day'

[fourbygrace]

I recently purchased L.R. Knost's new book "The Gentle Parent" and it is excellent. I liked that it covered all age groups.

[Kaela Parakaleo]

The reviews on this one look good (Positive Parenting in Action by Laura Ling and Rebecca Eanes):
http://smile.amazon.com/Positive-Parenting-Action-How-Principles-ebook/dp/B00DNI85HQ/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&colid=2JYN6XWLGXP9T&sr=&qid=&coliid=I1TAI6QULY0GRK

---------- Post added at 05:51 AM ---------- Previous post was at 05:48 AM ----------

The reviews look good for this one too.
Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting
by Laura Markham
http://smile.amazon.com/Peaceful-Parent-Happy-Kids-Connecting-ebook/dp/B008JHXOOK/ref=pd_sim_kstore_3?ie=UTF8&refRID=0NMB5PMTMYPSPK0QV4ZB

[Shutterbug]

The reviews look good for this one too.
Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting
by Laura Markham
http://smile.amazon.com/Peaceful-Parent-Happy-Kids-Connecting-ebook/dp/B008JHXOOK/ref=pd_sim_kstore_3?ie=UTF8&refRID=0NMB5PMTMYPSPK0QV4ZB

Love this book.

[On Fire]

Subbing

[m7k7b]

I am looking to get Biblical Parenting (Crystal Sutton) but having a hard time finding a copy to buy. Where can you purchase this book?


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[charla]

There are several used Biblical Parenting books in varying conditions here (http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/193058668X/ref=tmm_pap_used_olp_sr?ie=UTF8&condition=used&sr=&qid=) on Amazon.

[matildablewett]

Has anyone read Hints on Child Training by Henry Clay Trumbull??

I have heard that it's good, but is it?

Also, has anyone read Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment by Janet Heimlich?

I hope that I'm not resurrecting a thread that's too old . . .

[BestLaidPlans]

Thank you for this sticky! :rockon:heart

[amylounell]

L f
Let's


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[mariposa]

The Whole Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel (neuropsychiatrist and author of the bestselling Mindsight) and Tina Payne Bryson

No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

I can't recommend these books enough. For those who have been practicing gentle discipline, so much of what they write about will be familiar. There is so much brain science to explain why children act the way they do and to support gentle discipline. I love how the goal in the first book is integration between left and right brain. In the discipline book, the authors start out by stating discipline means "to instruct". So much great information in these two books! :yes
I found both at my library, and then ordered them to participate in a book study at my son's school.

[rjy9343]

The Whole Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel (neuropsychiatrist and author of the bestselling Mindsight) and Tina Payne Bryson

No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

I can't recommend these books enough. For those who have been practicing gentle discipline, so much of what they write about will be familiar. There is so much brain science to explain why children act the way they do and to support gentle discipline. I love how the goal in the first book is integration between left and right brain. In the discipline book, the authors start out by stating discipline means "to instruct". So much great information in these two books! :yes
I found both at my library, and then ordered them to participate in a book study at my son's school.
Thank you for the insight on those books. I am thinking I might like to order them for myself.