I can't do this anymore! Please help.

[tiglet]

I'm so tired I can hardly think straight.

Getting B to fall asleep in the evening is a long, drawn out process that usually ends with us driving her around in the car. Since our temps are falling rapidly and we have no garage, obviously this can't continue through the winter, even if we wanted it to. Bath, story, nursing, walking around, driving in car - the whole thing takes ~2 hours.
THEN- she wakes up every 2 hours through the night, wanting nursing. But it isn't nice polite nursing - she bites and chomps and hurts. If I pull her off, the screaming is instantaneous and long-lasting. She'll scream in dh's arms for an hour, until I finally give in and let her chew on me some more. By the time 3 or 4 am rolls around, my nipples have long-lasting bite marks and I'm resentful and exhausted. And so is dh. Often, she'll not go back to sleep from one of these wake ups for an hour or two.
I feel like I have nothing left.

I've tried NCSS, read the Dr. Sears tips, etc. etc. Nothing seems to help our stubborn girl. The Pantley "Let her nurse till she's sleepy and then pull her off- put her back on if she starts to fuss" totally doesn't work. She latches off easily, and cries full-strength. Often, she won't latch back on once I've asked her to stop. She's so engrossed in crying she refuses to acknowledge that breast is back.

I don't want to nurse her anymore.

I'm sure other people have been here. We've been like this for months. Will it magically end soon? Is there some suggestion that people haven't published?


And I think she knows.

[MarynMunchkins]

Does she have her molars yet? That sounds like teething behavior to me. I'd seriously think about some Motrin.

Colin has a papi to chew on, although I can understand not wanting to give her one now. Something to think about though...

well, we still struggle with the 2 hour bedtime thing with ds ;/ but this:

The Pantley "Let her nurse till she's sleepy and then pull her off- put her back on if she starts to fuss" totally doesn't work. She latches off easily, and cries full-strength. Often, she won't latch back on once I've asked her to stop. She's so engrossed in crying she refuses to acknowledge that breast is back.

reminds me of my dd.... and I hesitate to say this because I know the reaction it tends to get since I had it myself

dairy. we had this for 2 years, but I weaned her, thinking that would solve our problems it didnt., then I had NO tools to use. when we took out dairy her crazy sleeping stopped.

Ds also started sleeping better when we took out soy and he became more "regular" in regards to bm's. it was like he was always uncomfortable all through the night

I dont know about suggestions that havent been told, I have searched for magic answers to my childrens needs, but I think they are all so different that its so hard to say what will work for one child and what wont for another.
Like Mary just said about motrin, I have been using Motrin for ds's teeth, only to find out it makes him scream its just so hard to know what to do for each and every child.... I know its a totally lame answer

I think though you might want to research food options. I was on the NCSS list for a long time, researching, coming here and trying to figure it all out. My good friend has a 3 yr old they just discovered dairy, wheat and salycilate allergies and after 3 years of no sleep, she is finally sleeping!!!

anyway fwiw and yes, totally btdt (doing that?)

What do you mean by months? I know you are wiped , but if you can think back, how long has it been this way? That could be a key if it hasn't always been this way...whether it is teething or food related...When did this begin???

Abi nursed every two hours up until she was about two and a half. I didn't (usually when she was an infant) have a hard time getting her to sleep, but the rest of the night was a challenge with her nursing. Now she sleeps from ten p.m. to around seven, with just some movement and asking 'mommy?' a couple of times in the night....Thank God! Our routine is to go upstairs, maybe a bath or not, play on the bed and turn on a movie until she asks for 'snacks', then she nurses and goes off to sleep..I go to sleep then too. If she can't sleep by nursing (which is happening more often now) we lay there and talk or she crawls up on me and usually will fall asleep...if not, I fall asleep and she knows to lay there until she falls asleep!!
But, it was really really rough for two and a half plus years...I tried alot of different 'techniques' but what worked was to just be there with her from the time she wound down to sleep until morning.

Blessings,
Carol
Abi (29 Oct 02)

[tiglet]

Thank you all for the encouragement.

I've been giving her Motrin on nights that it seems like she's in pain from teething. And we cut out dairy from her diet about 2 weeks ago.

She's never been a sleeper - for 2 weeks, when she was 4 months old, she slept for 6-8 hours at a stretch, nearly every night. And then teething started. Every so often (I can think of two times in the last 3 months) she'll surprise us and sleep most of the night.

We were in a routine for awhile where she'd wake up, nurse nicely, and go back to sleep. *That* I could deal with. But this is another beast altogether. She's been like this since just before she turned 1 - so, about 3 months.

not to beat the subject to death are you cutting all the dairy out, even hidden? because it hides everywhere also, it takes about 30 days to get it all out.

[MarynMunchkins]

Dairy will make a HUGE difference. It worked for Ana.

And if it gives you any hope, things were like that for all my kids between a year and 18 months. It settled down dramatically after that.

[Maggie]

((((tiglet))))

But even if she cuts dairy out of Bonnie's diet, the milk in tiglet's diet could still affect Bonnie, right?

It's so hard, huh.... :/ One quick thing that I wanted to say as I just read your recent post is that sometimes Motrin made Abi more hyper in the night. It had an opposite affect of what I wanted...I'm just throwing that out there..maybe just watch and see....

Blessings,
Carol

I hope the motrin is helping her not to bite... I'm curious... what you do after she bites you?

[tiglet]

Last night was soooo much better!

She was drooling, biting, and sticking her fingers all over the back of her gums (molars?) so we gave her motrin before bed.

She slept 7 hours! Woke up ~3 am, nursed *nicely* and fell asleep again - didn't wake up again until 6:30, with us.

I was hoping that the milk in my diet could stay - I've always had it, and prior to several months ago, we weren't having any great problems.

If she bites bites hard and sudden, I say "Don't bite mama" and latch her off, and that's the end of nursing for at least 10 minutes. But what she usually does at night (not last night, hooray!!) is different - she'll be almost asleep, and kinda *chewing* - it's slow and painful, but if I can stand it long enough, she falls asleep. Sometimes I can stand it and I let her do it (I know, I shouldn't) but if I latch her off she screams and screams, and won't go to sleep until either A) I let her nurse and chew again or B) it's been an hour or two and she falls asleep from exhaustion.

Ergh.

Maybe last night was the start of a better trend. At any rate, I feel more rational today.

yeah, if you are breastfeeding, shes still getting the dairy

Im glad she slept better