Would you bother??

[milkmommy]

There is a debate with both Pearl and Ezzo going on at another board after time I've realized the main supporter of these methods and I are just at polar opposites. Shes way over to the other side more so then even some of the regular pro spankers. So if it was clear to you that this person see things like a 6 month old cooing for a smile as manulpative and onery or frst time never questiong do it happy as the only way to go even saying teaching why is just icing and secondary to the obedience . Anyways would you even bother? Do you find yourself compelled to answer or is it just not worth the time? I'm really torn here..

Deanna

[Katiebug]

I personally would just leave a few good Bible verses and leave it God to sort the rest out. And pray for her and her babies You aren't going to win her over with reason, or "convince" her that you're right and it will be too frustrating for you.

[MarynMunchkins]

I like to argue with those people. Mostly because I enjoy a good debate , but there are other reasons too. I don't honestly expect to win them over, but you get the chance to go so much deeper into things with people like that and it makes an impact on the undecided or "last resort" people reading.

[milkmommy]

Deleted to remove information not appropiate on this board
Deanna

[TulipMama]

If it is in a place where there are a lot of silent lurkers / mothers who are marginally involved, I may continue the discussion--but aimed at THEM, not at the entrenched person on the other side.

Coming from an Ezzo background, one of the things that really helped me reexamine my assumptions/beliefs was the consistent kindness, gentleness, gracious of the Ezzo critics. And their logic and answer for everything.

But other times, I think it is well worth it to just draw back and not feel the pressure to answer everything.

[Oliveshoots]

...would this be a situation in which you would want to "not throw your pearls to swine?" (no pun intended.)

I think if she is that one-sided and ornery herself (interesting), that you are wasting your time....time you could be encouraging someone who is more open to growth in that area. Time you could be encouraging the new mama or mama-to-be that is searching, like I was...and waiting for someone to show her the truth in God's word about how to parent as God parents us.

Just my op.

[MarynMunchkins]

I posted, Deanna.

Now I remember why I stopped reading over there in the first place.

Originally Posted by TulipMama

If it is in a place where there are a lot of silent lurkers / mothers who are marginally involved, I may continue the discussion--but aimed at THEM, not at the entrenched person on the other side.

Coming from an Ezzo background, one of the things that really helped me reexamine my assumptions/beliefs was the consistent kindness, gentleness, gracious of the Ezzo critics. And their logic and answer for everything.

But other times, I think it is well worth it to just draw back and not feel the pressure to answer everything.

ITA!!!

I would not bother if it was just me & the other person(s) toe to toe. Life is too short. But if I thought there was a decent chance that someone was lurking or pondering their choices, I'd make a case for gentle parenting. I agree totally that the Ezzo/Pearl advocates are stunningly harsh and quick to draw blood when a debate is on. What starts as a friendly conversation quickly turns into a bloodbath, and yes, it's usually the gentle parents (that would be me) who are bleeding. I get this frequently in the world of multiples, especially triplet parents because so many simply give up any semblance of kindness & patience and resort to draconian parenting. It just astounds me how brutal the "meanies" are, and yet the parents like me (who are few & far between) don't respond in kind. I'd LOVE to, though! I am definitely a "warrior princess" personality type. I just refuse to behave that way online.

What's/where's the BC board? Could you use backup and reinforcement?

[flowermama]

If you want to talk specifically about which board and where, and if someone wants to go over and help, please contact the OP and take such discussions to PMs. I don't feel it's appropriate for the GCM board to be a place that encourages people to go post at other message boards specifically to promote our beliefs. I'd dislike it if people did that to our board, and I want to show the same respect to other boards. Thank you.

[milkmommy]

Originally Posted by flowermama

If you want to talk specifically about which board and where, and if someone wants to go over and help, please contact the OP and take such discussions to PMs. I don't feel it's appropriate for the GCM board to be a place that encourages people to go post at other message boards specifically to promote our beliefs. I'd dislike it if people did that to our board, and I want to show the same respect to other boards. Thank you.

I'm sorry thats why I didn't say where in my orginal post but spilled the beans latter. Opps.

Deanna

[MarynMunchkins]

Sorry, Jeri.

[flowermama]

You are forgiven, ladies. Thank you for understanding.

Sorry! I forgot myself -- I was just trying to show support.

[ArmsOfLove]

Want to know why my post count is so high? Because this is the only online board where I go (except occasionally popping in at one other board where some old friends post). I just realized that life is too short to spend my time debating things like this or getting into it with people who see life through an entirely different paradigm. They don't get children or grace the way I do and we're talking past each other. I 'd rather spend my time around women who see things the way I do, or are being led by God to do so, or who at least have honest questions and are interested. I find so much more peace in my soul when I just post here

I agree about sharing information if it's for the silent lurkers who might learn something, and bowing out graciously if it's just about going toe to toe.