Need help w/my 2.5 y/o!

My lovely 2 year old.... S/he is VERY verbal for his/her age, so sometimes I think we forget that s/he is only 2 LOL But the problems we are having lately is....him/her throwing him/herself down in a tantrum at the drop of a hat! We might have this happen 10 times in a day. I am not kidding! Now, I know that tantrumming is normal. I no longer feel like I have to force this child to stop tantrumming and be cheerful. But it does drive ya nuts a little LOL I know I'm probably not helping you help me, b/c I'm not giving a specific example *sigh* But in general, what on earth can I do to get through these tantrums?

Also...I have two other children who are around almost-school age, who are still having those jump-up-and-down fits usually daily (I mean between the two of them, usually at least one will do it at some point in the day.) WHY would they still be doing this? Now, they can usually be stopped by saying "stop jumping up and down." But still...is is just a normal way of expressing yourself when you are around 4-6yrs old? I am trying not to take this personally, but ARGH!

Some things I have thought of ....maybe I am not paying them enough attention? I don't mean attention as in "tom@to st@king" them and keeping them by my feet 24/7. I mean attention as in....being with them, cuddling, playing, etc. It seems like all I do with my life is take care of the youngest (baby), do what's necessary (cook, clean, try to keep up with laundry, etc) and then try to take time for myself to relax (read a mag, GCM, etc.) Gosh, that sounds bad huh? Hmmm maybe I have answered my own question

I know my 4 year old ds jumps up and down in frustration. Like you said, he can usually stop with a simple, "Please stop jumping up and down so we can talk about what's bothering you." I don't know what "tom@to st@king" is. (I mean, I know what it spells and I've seen the technique mentioned before but I can't remember what it means)

As far as your 2 year old, what do you do during the tantrum? With my two year old, I try to stay with her, hold her if she'll allow it, and talk quietly.Usually she is overtired or frustrated and I try to kkeep reminding myself of that.

my 4 year old ds jumps up and down in frustration. Like you said, he can usually stop with a simple, "Please stop jumping up and down so we can talk about what's bothering you." I don't know what "tom@to st@king" is. (I mean, I know what it spells and I've seen the technique mentioned before but I can't remember what it means)

It means keeping a child by your side (in arms reach) at ALL times, literally ALL times. And I'm glad to know that my children who are around that age are normal..and I *am* thankful they will stop usually when I say "Stop jumping up and down"..... but WHY must they even to it in the first place???

As far as your 2 year old, what do you do during the tantrum? With my two year old, I try to stay with her, hold her if she'll allow it, and talk quietly.Usually she is overtired or frustrated and I try to kkeep reminding myself of that.

Well, what I do depends largely on what I am already doing when it happens. For instance, suppose I'm feeding the baby and 2 y/o asks for some crackers. I'll say "K, just a minute." If s/he is in a normal chipper mood, then it's fine. If, however, s/he is tired/just woke up/hungry/etc, then s/he collapses in a tantrum. Or sometimes I'll get agitated b/c I'm trying to do something and the 2 y/o will stand there and incessantly repeat "Mommy I want _____" overandoverandoverandover. Finally I'll just go "_________! JUST a minute! My goodness!!!" Well, ok so I probably shouldn't be doing that, and maybe s/he's sensitive to such things... but OMGoodness do I wanna when s/he is saying it overandoverandoverandoverandover. Now that I think of it, it does usually happen at times when s/he is tired or just "needy" (like when I'm busy w/the baby, whom s/he absolutely ADORES, so there is hardly any jealousy issues going on... but maybe lack of attention?) I have spent the whole morning with them, instead of LOL But I just wanted to check in and see if any replies had been made. Well, I better go be w/them some more before nap time arrives!!!

ETA-another thing: These things w/the 2 y/o often happen when I have told him/her to do/stop doing something and s/he totally ignores me, and so I say it AGAIN (and again) and finally am so irritated that I do raise my voice. Then s/he collapses and cries. ???????????? (And generally s/he listens well, but the times s/he doesn't, this is what happens.)

[ArmsOfLove]

A question based on one of the things you were describing . . . do you verbally answer your children as soon as they ask you a question? If you are more introverted it's possible that you don't and you are assuming that they know you're thinking about it. But they may actually need you so say that you're thinking about it. If I ask someone a question and they don't answer me right away I assume they didn't hear me and repeat myself.

Originally Posted by ArmsOfLove

A question based on one of the things you were describing . . . do you verbally answer your children as soon as they ask you a question? If you are more introverted it's possible that you don't and you are assuming that they know you're thinking about it. But they may actually need you so say that you're thinking about it. If I ask someone a question and they don't answer me right away I assume they didn't hear me and repeat myself.

Yea but I bet you at least take a breath before repeating yourself!

Thats interesting you should ask this...No I don't always verbally reply, and Yes I *am* usually more introverted , and DO find myself thinking "S/he knows I'm thinking about what s/he just asked..." .........meanwhile I hear "mommymommymommy...." and can't even hear myself think!