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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
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23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

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Old 04-06-2011, 07:23 AM   #61
Cook
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

I have some personal experience with background checking stuff... It looks like just court cases though and not actual complaints although those might be listed some how with? GL though! This is a horrific story and I totally agree that it being public would make someone think twice I feel bad for these people too, what I read on your link seems to point to them having little to no idea of their errors.
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:27 AM   #62
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

The thing I hate about these cases that are prosecuted is that it has to be a very young child, a child has to die, etc. What happened to these babies is atrocious. But it's atrocious regardless of the age or the outcome. So many people can't see that.

So many times I've linked to stories like these with people commenting things like 'They took it too far' or 'of course you have to use common sense'. It's so sad how hardened people's hearts have become because spanking has become ingrained with their faith and theology.

I truly hope that lives are transformed through this situation coming to light. The lives of the children, the parents and all those that hear it.
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:36 AM   #63
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

Quote:
So many times I've linked to stories like these with people commenting things like 'They took it too far' or 'of course you have to use common sense'.
I told someone the other day - GBD is the only parenting style I know of where 'taking it too far' results in even better-behaved children and closer families I mean, if something can be taken too far and result in death...it's not godly.
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:38 AM   #64
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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Originally Posted by NewLeaf View Post
The thing I hate about these cases that are prosecuted is that it has to be a very young child, a child has to die, etc. What happened to these babies is atrocious. But it's atrocious regardless of the age or the outcome. So many people can't see that.

So many times I've linked to stories like these with people commenting things like 'They took it too far' or 'of course you have to use common sense'. It's so sad how hardened people's hearts have become because spanking has become ingrained with their faith and theology.

I truly hope that lives are transformed through this situation coming to light. The lives of the children, the parents and all those that hear it.
I agree with you completely.
And,
I have been one of "those" people. I have hit my dds repeatedly, many times a day for things which now don't even make me think twice about my sons doing it. (the girls are nearly ten and 8.5 - boys are 3.5 and nearly two)
I could go on and on about the things I have done because I truly believed it was best, right and Biblical. The implications of the wrongness of what I have done, and what has been done to me, in Christ's name, no less, still make me want to crawl in a hole and hide sometimes. It is truly terrible.

Always, no matter where I am at right now, my mantra is "but for the grace of God..." His grace is what keeps me going when I am so wrong these days and it is what keeps me going when I am once again hit with the severity of what I have done.

This is why I so appreciate what Katiekind said on the first page -
Quote:
I am sick to my stomach. God pour tenderest mercy on those poor children and lift the veil of deception in the minds of the adults. That is horrible.
I wonder if someone prayed that way for me? I wonder if that is what has made the difference in my heart and home?
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:50 AM   #65
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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Originally Posted by Wonder Woman View Post
I told someone the other day - GBD is the only parenting style I know of where 'taking it too far' results in even better-behaved children and closer families I mean, if something can be taken too far and result in death...it's not godly.
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Old 04-06-2011, 09:25 AM   #66
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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Originally Posted by ShiriChayim View Post
Reb's blog links to several other news articles on the story that are really illuminating. The initial reports were made by former members who would attend services and noticed the pastor preaching about the "rod" combined with parents removing their children to side rooms and hearing the spankings going on, even the infants.

In one news article the prosecutor is very careful to mention that this is NOT a case of religious freedom, that the Law cannot be broken in the name of God; and I imagine this is why there's such a careful and methodic case being built including the notation of the church's origins and interviewing the former pastor. If these people are going to claim that they are simply being persecuted in the name of their faith, that this other church holds a grudge, or any number of other things the criminal complaint must be clear about who said what and when and why.
What you talked about in the second paragraph here is what I was worried it was all about. It is good to hear where the complaints came from. That makes more sense now.
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Old 04-06-2011, 10:47 AM   #67
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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Originally Posted by NewCovenantMama View Post
I find this interesting. I'm planning a "position paper" on child discipline abuse and the false teachings which have enabled it to happen. OK if I reference this?
If you ever wish to make said paper public, please keep me in mind as this is exactly up my alley.

Speaking of intuition, I have an article written by a GCM called, Following Your Instincts.
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Old 04-06-2011, 02:17 PM   #68
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

Rebecca - I want to thank you for posting that criminal complaint. I wrote a note to my church's pastor and librarian, asking that we not purchase any more Lori Wick books, and attached the link to the complaint - the focus of my note being that we not send any more $ towards that kind of "church". I belong to an SBC church (although an unusual one), and the discipline ideas of the congregation run the gamut, so I didn't want to push people by suggesting that we remove all of her books from the shelves. Anyway, I got a same-day response, and both the pastor and librarian were clear - they not only would not buy any more of her books, but any that the church had would be removed.

So again, thank you!!!
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Old 04-06-2011, 04:17 PM   #69
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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@ LoraLee and DoulaClara: Absolutely!
I put it up. One person said she was putting it on her wall for her sister to read. So you got passed around! Yay you! Yay God!
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Old 04-06-2011, 05:14 PM   #70
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

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If you ever wish to make said paper public, please keep me in mind as this is exactly up my alley.
I absolutely intend to make it public. I'll send you the link when it's finally up.
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:42 PM   #71
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Default Re: Criminal complaint released in the Lori/Timothy/Andrea Wick abuse scandal

WOW that is awful! How on earth could anyone spank a 8 week old baby!!! This is abuse on so many levels. A baby fusses or makes noise...whatever because of a reason, it needs to eat, diaper change, needs loved etc. This could lead to male nurished babies who learn to not cry because their needs aren't going to be met anyway and also it is just sick! WOW. I have read Lori Wick's books before but stopped when I lost count of what I had read lol but I will not be buying anymore.
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