Gentle Christian Mothers Community

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-   Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/forumdisplay.php?f=421)
-   -   Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/showthread.php?t=351134)

mwwr 03-20-2010 02:25 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
:cup

mothersson2002 03-20-2010 02:32 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
http://slog. thestranger.com/2008/09/ ted_tripp_the_paradox_and_how_to_wield_t

Here's what he said at a Seattle conference:Smack him, and make sure you use a paddle that “spreads the shock over the wide area.”

"Peaceful protesters were spat upon and yelled at by parents attending this conference and demonstrators were hounded on public property by church security". http://tripp mtomars. blogspot.com/2008/09/some-good -news-and-some-bad-news.htmlThat doesn't seem loving does it?

AngEngland 03-20-2010 02:36 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by SortaCrunchy (Post 2971246)
Hmmmmmm.

When I read that, I guess I tend to think more of Love and Logic type reasoning. "This is the choice you made, and this is the consequence of that choice." I use that often in my scripts with my girls, not in a shaming way, but more to emphasize the power of the choices we make.

Yes - we had a great example of this for our children when my husband got pulled over for speeding. The police officer came to the door and the kids were like HI! Why are you talking to us?! and Sidney said "Daddy was driving too fast. Just like when you do something you shouldn't do and get in trouble. That happens to grown ups too."

I think it surprised the officer that we both instantly had that response to our children (vs immediately making excuses or even, sorry Cop, handing over our insurance) because we thought it was important to capitilize on their questions.

The truth is - real life DOES have consequences. And children have to learn that. Go outside without your shoes on, and you just might hurt your feet. Lol!

Megan, we use those words in our family too but not shaming. More just - matter-of-fact. And "how can we do things different next time?" type of teaching.

Angela <><

Hermana Linda 03-20-2010 02:41 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Striving4Grace, It must be very hard to hear these things being said about your pastor. :sigh I hope you don't feel attacked. :hug2 We are trying very hard to be gentle, but we are also very passionate about fighting those teachings. :yes3

Six Little Feet 03-20-2010 02:47 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hermana Linda (Post 2971406)
Striving4Grace, It must be very hard to hear these things being said about your pastor. :sigh I hope you don't feel attacked. :hug2 We are trying very hard to be gentle, but we are also very passionate about fighting those teachings. :yes3

Yes.

The purpose of this forum is:

Quote:

Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.

Tripp is in this category. I really think that what HL said should be taken to heart. I am both hopeful and fearful for you. Pastors like Tripp are master manipulators. They come across as very knowledgeable and that their way is THE WAY. While Tripp may be specifically telling you not to spank I thinks is paradigm is still potentially harmful to you. It would not be fair if we let the rest of his teaching slide.

simplegirl 03-20-2010 02:47 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hermana Linda (Post 2971406)
Striving4Grace, It must be very hard to hear these things being said about your pastor. :sigh I hope you don't feel attacked. :hug2 We are trying very hard to be gentle, but we are also very passionate about fighting those teachings. :yes3

This. :hug

I LOVE my girlfriends who follow SACH to a tee and spank "out of love" in all the proper ways. However I still believe they are deeply misguided in what God has to say about parenting through his scriptures.

Kirk Cameron visited and spoke at my church a couple of Sundays ago. He seemed like a very nice man, but there was definitely an element of :scratch with some of the stuff he was talking about that made me wonder about how he parented. I'm always hopeful, but ya never know.

mothersson2002 03-20-2010 03:08 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
No, Striving for Grace, please, not trying to offend all. I'm sure he has wonderful qualities as everyone does. Just trying to protect the children from physical assault. "Shepherding a Child's Heart" is the book that Kirk Cameron recommends. A lot of people respect him, therefore will follow his advice and recommendations.

---------- Post added at 02:08 PM ---------- Previous post was at 01:50 PM ----------

I know that Candace Cameron(who also mean very well surely ) recommends Ted Tripp's teachings as said in her former chatroom.
She does recommend a Debbie Pearl book:

My recommended reading for you is:
Created to Be His Help Meet by Debbie Pearl. She recommends another author as well.http://www. worldviewweekend.com/ worldview-times/article.php?articleid=1617

Autumn 03-20-2010 03:36 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by mothersson2002 (Post 2971422)
I know that Candace Cameron recomends Ted Tripp's teachings as said in her former chatroom.
She does recommend a Debbie Peal book:

My recommended reading for you is: [/FONT]Created to Be His Help Meet by Debbie Pearl.

:yuck

katiekind 03-20-2010 04:05 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Pastors like Tripp are master manipulators.
I certainly wouldn't say this...I'd say there's a lot of disagreement (naturally) with his teachings. He seems fairly straightforward, though, rather than manipulative.

Six Little Feet 03-20-2010 04:18 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
I think they are manipulative because they get the parent in a position where they are vulnerable (most parents are vulnerable when reading a parenting book)and worried about their child's salvation. That is manipulative in my books.

katiekind 03-20-2010 04:30 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Thank you for expanding your thoughts, Sheryl. That's helpful. I can't recommend the book, but I would imagine he's a fine pastor and may grow, change, or become more nuanced in his ideas of how grace and truth can be applied in parenting.

Six Little Feet 03-20-2010 04:38 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by katiekind (Post 2971594)
Thank you for expanding your thoughts, Sheryl. That's helpful. I can't recommend the book, but I would imagine he's a fine pastor and may grow, change, or become more nuanced in his ideas of how grace and truth can be applied in parenting.


I agree :hug

Treenahurricane 03-20-2010 04:44 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by mothersson2002 (Post 2971422)
No, Striving for Grace, please, not trying to offend all. I'm sure he has wonderful qualities as everyone does. Just trying to protect the children from physical assault. "Shepherding a Child's Heart" is the book that Kirk Cameron recommends. A lot of people respect him, therefore will follow his advice and recommendations.

---------- Post added at 02:08 PM ---------- Previous post was at 01:50 PM ----------

I know that Candace Cameron(who also mean very well surely ) recommends Ted Tripp's teachings as said in her former chatroom.
She does recommend a Debbie Pearl book:

My recommended reading for you is:
Created to Be His Help Meet by Debbie Pearl. She recommends another author as well.http://www. worldviewweekend.com/ worldview-times/article.php?articleid=1617

I can't remember if it was Kirk or Candace's site the originally recommended TTUAC for a while until the Sean Paddock controversy as well. :sick

mothersson2002 03-20-2010 05:30 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
It is wonderfully good that you choose to not hit your children Striving for Grace!☺

CelticJourney 03-20-2010 06:55 PM

Re: Kirk Cameron and Ted Tripp
 
Quote:

Help children to recognize that consequences are not "what I am doing to you" but "what you have brought about by the choices you have made." "You are reaping what you have sown!"....Biblical consequences must be reasonable and logical.
I think where we part company with Tripp is at this point. He sees spanking as reasonable, we do not. We all agree about consequences to negative behaviors - be it the removal of an item the child can't handle responsibly all the way to an older child needing to rebuild trust in their relationship beteen them and their parent. We don't agree that causing pain is logical for an issue of trust or respect or responsiblity. Avoidence of pain more often teaches a child to 'not get caught' long before it teaches them to modify their behavior based on understanding or maturing. 'Reeping what you have sown' is about natural conseqences, 'what I am doing to you' is about a parent's decision to apply pain on top of natural consequence at their discretion.

Does that help?


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