Punitive Parenting Memes

[Mama2MeadowRose]

I'm so sick of seeing them all over facebook and via people I know. It's disgusting. Discipline means to disciple, to teach. What's so difficult to get about that? And the idea that 'it works!', yeah well lots of things work, doesn't make it right. Ugh! Just so sick of it!! Why do people defend abuse, including that within their own childhood.

[Elora]

:hugheart
because they don't view it as abuse

It's VERY hard to see dysfunction when you are engulfed in it

[nutmeg]

I get sick of it too. I always think to myself when I see that 'and thats why you have so many mental health issues....cuz it works....uh huh ok right' :doh

[LearningMama]

I just have to hide those things and move on. When FB asks why I'm hiding I say it was inappropriate. I recently removed someone from my feed because I was tired of her talking about whipping her son when he would wake up and ask to eat. :bheart

[MegMarch]

It is frustrating to see so often. Especially from older generations going on about how soft parents are on their kids today. And so many of them include pulling pants up. I don't love saggy pants on dudes but 1. most guys don't wear pants that way now 2. pants aren't relevant!

[Mama2MeadowRose]

Its just this idea that theres no respect today cuz people aren't spanking their kids. Really? Last I checked with statistics and all, isn't it the punitively punished kids who end up in jail? THe ones from tough districts who know what 'tough love' (or abuse) is?

How can people even joke about memes like that even?

[LearningMama]

It's easy to joke about it when it's the norm. Growing up in school we would compare what types of items we were hit with, hanger, book, switch, etc., and laugh about it.

I also think it helps to normalize it in their own mind and make it ok. Otherwise they would have to admit that something very wrong was done to them by their parents or whoever, someone that loves them, and that is a hard pill to swallow

[Mama2MeadowRose]

I just don't see how anyone can joke about it, Ive never been able to joke about it.

[Ramee151]

I haven't seen one in a long while, but I have a friend who has started reporting them to Facebook (flag as inappropriate) because they "promote violence". I'm planning to do the same with the next one(s) I see...

[Mama2MeadowRose]

that's a great idea!!

[J3K]

Someone was joking about a parenting meme a few weeks ago and I said (In horror) "Do you realize you just said that out loud?" Got my point across rather nicely.

I hide all parenting memes.

And Duck Dynasty "wisdom" memes. And the same people who then posted a couple of weeks later quotes from MLK Jr....not seeing the hypocrisy. :sick

[Drew]

I just have to hide those things and move on. When FB asks why I'm hiding I say it was inappropriate. I recently removed someone from my feed because I was tired of her talking about whipping her son when he would wake up and ask to eat. :bheart

:sick

[LearningMama]

:sick

I know. I forgot to add that she also included a picture of her son. :(

[Drew]

I know. I forgot to add that she also included a picture of her son. :(

Ugh. That would break my heart. Poor little guy.

[Rose5000]

I just don't see how anyone can joke about it, Ive never been able to joke about it.

I know it's painful to think about , huh?

what is a meme ? (i'm new to fb)

[Mama2MeadowRose]

A picture with a phrase/words on it. Like the Dos Equis ones floating around that go like "I dont always ___, but when I do I be sure to _____". One the ones with Willy Wonka on it where he's trying to figure out something illogical that many people assume logical and usually ends with "So tell me how you think ____".

[Marsha]

It is frustrating to see so often. Especially from older generations going on about how soft parents are on their kids today. And so many of them include pulling pants up. I don't love saggy pants on dudes but 1. most guys don't wear pants that way now 2. pants aren't relevant!


I don't know where you live. But where I live, pants halfway down the butt is the norm. At the risk of sounding like a crotchety old person, I find it disgusting. However, even if I had a son, I doubt there's much I could do about it, except n the confines of my own home.

[MegMarch]

I don't know where you live. But where I live, pants halfway down the butt is the norm. At the risk of sounding like a crotchety old person, I find it disgusting. However, even if I had a son, I doubt there's much I could do about it, except n the confines of my own home.
I've got skinny jeaned guys around here. Blech! I don't love the look of sagging pants or skinny jeans either, but I don't feel like anyone needs to blame parents not spanking their kids for them.

[Virginia]

I teach in an urban high school.
I guarantee almost all of my students were spanked growing up.
Those very same kids where their pants below their behinds...so yeah. Spanking doesn't prevent sagging.

And agree about reporting the memes...they make me so sad, and I just can't look at them :(

[BarefootBetsy]

:think Yeah, I think I'm going to start reporting them also. I usually just scroll by quickly while making note of who posted it so that if they do it again I can hide them :sigh

[NurseKristie]

It should be reported. It promotes abuse. Often that gets it removed.

[saturnfire16]

I haven't seen one in a long while, but I have a friend who has started reporting them to Facebook (flag as inappropriate) because they "promote violence". I'm planning to do the same with the next one(s) I see...

I'd be hesitant to do this. It's not actually going to stop the memes from spreading, but it does take up a lot of facebook moderators' time. Which I wouldn't have cared about, until I read an article written by a fb moderator in which he explained that facebook calls the police in the local area when they see posts that sound like someone is in immediate danger. He was angry because a post by a little girl who's uncle was molesting her was put off for 7 hours, because the moderators were dealing with people complaining about posts that "offend" them, but aren't actually hurting anyone. There was another one on the news lately, where facebook called the police when a woman posted that her bf had held her captive in a motel room for months.

I do think its appropriate to report some... for example, there were some going around (not from MY friends, but I read about them) where they showed women tied up and bloody and talked about beating women or raping them for getting out of line. To me that crosses a line that a post that say "The world would be better if more kids were spanked," just doesn't cross.

Also, then we just succeed in making the friend angry for reporting them. I think it's better to build the kind of relationship where you can plant seeds of different thinking or if you don't have an energy to do that, just block them.

[Synesthesia]

I dislike such memes.

[CelticJourney]

23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

I am operating on the assumption that the point of this tread is ideas for response. Unfortunately, my advice is 'do not engage'. Facebook can be great for keeping up with friends. Facebook can also be very, very destructive. If you are bothered by what others are posting, hide the memes or block the person. These people are not discussing parenting programs or philosophy, they are just going for shock value. There is really very little you can do to change a person's core beliefs over social media - it requires an investment in their lives beyond just 'friending' them. If what you are reading is adding a high level of negativity into your life, it is up to you to stop reading it.

[Marrae]

:up Yes, life is happier and more pleasant for me since I decided to hide certain people and certain posts on Facebook.

[rjy9343]

I hide the memes, too. I used to report them and then realized that while they are diametrically opposed to what I believe, there are no laws that are broken. I do however hide those memes and if someone posts to many of them, I hide that person.

[NurseKristie]

I hide the memes, too. I used to report them and then realized that while they are diametrically opposed to what I believe, there are no laws that are broken. I do however hide those memes and if someone posts to many of them, I hide that person.

I still report them because they often promote child abuse. Some are more "harmless", but anything promoting hitting with objects or not on the rear is against the law some places, so I still report those.

[Aisling]

Somehow, I've managed to never see one on my feed. :hunh:shifty