How do you explain "gay" to your children?

[tree_hugger]

Yesterday DS2 said, "Oh, that is so GAY!" I asked him what he meant by that, and he said it meant silly.

I want to give them more accurate definitions, but I'm not sure where to start.

I don't think being gay is a sin so I do not care to include that in my explanation.

Any suggestions? :)

[Katigre]

I would do two things:

1. "Saying "that's so gay" is not a kind way to talk - you can say "that's silly" instead. (And be firm about that - it is a really unkind way to speak regardless of your beliefs about homosexuality as sin).

2. "Gay" means when two men like each other or two women like each other (then you can insert beliefs about ithow God designed it to be a woman and a man but the world doesn't always work the way God wants because of sin if that is your framework).

Most of all, keep it simple :yes.

[Marsha]

WEll, fiirst of all, I asked what mine meant. Well, you know, Mom kinda dumb and lame?

So I went into my lecture about semantic drift (how usage and meaning of words change over time in a living language) and how gay means something completely different but has come to mean two people of same gender who "like" each other. And then has come to mean even MORE something dumb and lame. And that it just isn't a proper use of the word and also seems to imply that the people who "like" same gender are dumb and lame.

and then I go into the same lecture about the use of dumb and lame. I kid you not, I can make cussing sound boring.

[NewMommy]

I am related to someone who is gay, so this conversation was a lot easier for me to have with my little one.
A simple explanation would be something along the lines of "the word gay means that a person is sexually attracted to a person of the same gender."
Then definitely nip your kid's language in the bud and just explain that it's not nice to use the word "gay" in the context of "that's so gay".

[Castle On A Cloud]

I would keep it simple. (ftr, i also do not believe it is a sin...) Sometimes a girl likes a boy (and visa versa) but sometimes a boy likes a boy, or a girl like a girl. The term for that is homosexual, but alot of people use the word gay. So we should not be saying "that is so gay..." cause that just does not make any sense...

[tree_hugger]

Thanks everyone, as usual I think I was over-analysing it. I'll just say its when a boy likes a boy or a girl likes a girl, I think. I might have to add more because my oldest is an Aspie and very literal - he would likely go around telling others that he is gay because he has male friends who he likes. :giggle

And I will definitely nip the "that's so gay" in the bud, not only is it offensive but it does not make sense!

Thanks again! :heart

[mountainash]

I try to avoid saying "like" because it's too ambiguous. "Gay is when two men or two women feel romantically attracted to each other." Which has elicited this expression from my son :hunh. I try not to affirm or discourage his thoughts on the matter. I want them to be his thoughts.