Watching other people parent is hard sometimes

[littlemama]

We were at the park with the kids today and a Mama with two young boys (I'd say 5-6yrs and 2yrs) appeared nearby. She was going to practice baseball with the oldest. The younger began crying....he wanted her to push him on the swing.

She began getting after him to stop it, threatening to go home, rolling her eyes, etc. Once she did finally take him over, "I'll push you ONCE but that's it!!!" He continued to cry as she walked away from him. She went back over and as she scooped him up out of the swing, "FINE. We are going home then." But she didn't..she just sat with him for a minute to get him to calm down.

In the mean time the older son had made a new friend, a little boy his age who came over to talk to him.

After she got him settled she went back over to the older son. The younger followed, crying again. But now, reaching for his Mama. She started to practice ball again and as the little one came closer she yelled and held her hand out to him, "STOP. DO NOT come any closer. You will get hit!!!!"

Immediately after she said that, she turned to this new friend the older son had made. She offered him the extra baseball mitt and said, "Would you like to play??"

The younger son stood there, the crying continued, and he kept reaching for her, "Mama!! Mama!!!"

:cry

It was heartbreaking. All he wanted was to be included and have some of his Mama's attention. Why couldn't he help catch the balls his brother was hitting towards them? He wasn't hitting them hard enough for the little one to be hit and hurt. And most of them were grounders and he was only hitting a few she threw.

We started to go over as we were leaving and offer the little guy some bubbles to play with but the new friend's mother stepped in. She offered to take him to swing but he wouldn't go. I don't blame him. A strange lady is coming over offering to take him away from his Mama. I wouldn't want to go either.

[raining_kisses]

:(thats sad

[ThreeKids]

He really was in danger of getting hit if he went closer.

[NewLeaf]

It is hard sometimes. :hugheart Going over to offer help (though someone got there first) was a great way to handle it. Hopefully she was just having an off day.

[littlemama]

He really was in danger of getting hit if he went closer.

No, not really.

He wasn't near the brother swinging the bat. She wasn't throwing the balls hard. And when he did hit them, as I said, they were 95% grounders.

[SamRose]

It's hard to see kids sad, but I try to give ppl the benefit of the doubt and some grace. Maybe the younger boy has been clingy & crabby ALL day, and older brother got no attention paid to him. Mom decides maybe some time at the park would help everyone's mood, but toddler screams and fusses the whole way. By the time they arrive, mom is just spent and having a really hard time dealin w/ the toddler anymore. If the 2yo started crying right away just cuz she didnt do wut he wanted, Id be willing to bet this isnt the 1st time mom has had to deal w/ it, and she might have just been at the end of her rope w/ his behavior and not known how to deal. She might not have handled things great, but she may have been doing her best after a long morning/day. Just a thought :heart (and take wut I say w/ a grain of salt I guess, since I live in an area where Id love to C that kind of parental involvement, cuz it's better than the unsupervised kids at our park, or the parents/gaurdians who cuss & smoke).

[littlemama]

Yeah, of course I get that. I think all of us do. We've all had those days with our little ones. And probably many of us haven't handled it in the most graceful way.

Still doesn't make it any easier to watch a little one crying and reaching out for his Mama.

[SamRose]

Yeah, of course I get that. I think all of us do. We've all had those days with our little ones. And probably many of us haven't handled it in the most graceful way.

Still doesn't make it any easier to watch a little one crying and reaching out for his Mama.

I know, that's Y my reply was started the way it was ;)
Ive seen ppl post similar things here, tho, who dont "get" what I was referring to. Thas the only reason I wrote wut I did. Last week was a rough one here w/ my youngest, maybe I just had to sympathize. :shrug3 (tho Id never do the fake "we're leaving if U dont xyz" thing, that really annoys me. :shifty)

[3PeasInAPod]

It sounds different when it's all typed out here , then what you saw & heard first hand.

I'm sure it was disheartening to witness...:hugheart

[dulce de leche]

:( Like you said, it sounds as if it would have been easy to include him while still giving the older boy attention.

[Psyche]

It makes me sad too, but sometimes when you're inside the bubble actively parent, you don't see things as clearly as when you're outside watching. I know I"ve hurt Caden's feelings b/c I was so intuned parenting Jon, that I couldn't "see" his hurt, kwim?

[nazmommy]

I totally agree on how discouraging and heart breaking it is to see ppl choosing to parent in what we think to be a harsh way. My heart just aches for children that I see crying out and no one responding to their needs. I agree with the p/p on how she may have had a hard day or maybe not realize how harsh you actually sound. Its hard to remember that when you are witnessing it first hand.
However, I know when your heart hurts, it's telling you something is wrong or out of place. That poor baby in need of his mommy would have made me horribly sad too. It make me worry that it is a pattern in the child's life. I have a very hard time not crying then and there and being disturbed by sights like those. I just want to hug, hug, hug. Its actually hard for me to know what to do b/c my heart aches so badly.
My only solace (although my heart still aches) is to pray, pray, pray for God to guide the child, parents, family to a closer walk with Christ and to give me wisdom and insight on how/when to offer help/intervene.
Please come quickly, Lord Jesus, we need to go Home!