so when your only child is about to be a sibling

[filmgirl2911]

I'm looking for ideas for how to make my little girl's transition from center of the universe to Big Sister in just a couple of months as smooth as possible :heart

She is just about to turn two, and we have talked about the baby in mama's tummy, that there is going to be a new baby in the house and we have a couple of books that we read about a new baby in the house . . .

What I'm hoping to get from mama's who have already done this (or from those who are about to :)) is some of the things you planned / did for the actual birth day / baby meeting - like gifts or special plans, and things like that :heart

:ty4

[MudPies]

:popcorn I'm in the same boat! I did get dink a present to him from the baby. looking to make things smooth.

[Kiara.I]

DS1 got a present from the baby. He also got a doll, so that he had a baby to take care of. Do *NOT* make the doll the present from the baby unless you know your child will be delighted to have a doll. :)

If you are still nursing the elder, making a point of nursing them at the same time for the first while seemed to help with mine. It avoided some of the, "I'm busy with the baby" stuff that drives young ones crazy.

If your child will be away from you while you are having the baby (which is likely) remember that when they arrive back, or you arrive home, or they come to visit, or whatever, they want to see *you*. They really do *not* want to meet the baby. Forcing it on them may result in problems. I read about that on the LLL website, actually, and thought it was brilliant. DD1 arrived to visit mom and baby at the hospital, and dad poked his head into the room to check that mom wasn't nursing, asleep, whatever. The baby was in the bassinet at the time. It was a good time for DD1 to visit, so she came in, snuggled with mom. Nobody forced an introduction on her. After a bit of cuddle time, she looked around and noticed the baby, and then got to meet it. You can let your child lead in this situation. Some kids might be super excited about the baby, depending on age and personality type. But at 2, most probably want to know that they haven't been displaced. Do the reconnect with mom, which is important for them, and *then* let them discover baby.

[swimming with sharks]

Let her pick out a gift for the baby....and make sure the baby gets her a nice gift :yes DD got a shirt that said she was the BIG SISTER (I know some people aren't keen on that one but she was in LOVE with her new title and nearly wore holes in it! :heart) She got to help me pick out the outfit we'd bring the baby home in. In the hospital Momma and Baby and Daddy get a bracelet with name, etc on it. Our nurse gave her a PINK bracelet with Big Sister and her name on it. It's still one of her treasures and she's asked repeatedly if she'll get one this time as well. :giggle We got both Baby on the Way, and what Baby needs by the Sears and she really liked reading those over and over. Make sure she knows the baby will CRY A LOT...even if the baby is calm and quiet, there will be more crying that will be loud to her.:yes Also go over her feelings...sometimes you may not like the baby, that's ok. :heart Both Sears books go into this in the parent columns. I think it's pretty important. You're not planting the seeds in her mind, they'll already be there, but if she doesn't know what to do with them, they might make her feel bad which could just cause more trouble. I also made sure her and I got some quality time together...like we took girl baths and the boys got to hand out in the study :shrug3 Remember...she will IMMEDIATELY seem like a giant and you will most likely feel the need to protect your new baby from her and her giant clumsiness. :bag You will feel awful about it. :hugheart It's ok....a few weeks and you'll be on a more even keel. Tell your dh that it's coming so he doesn't think you've gone off the deep end :yes You might come up with some fun stuff for her to do kept in a box or special place for when you're nursing the new little one that she can do with little guidance. Give LOTS and LOTS of grace to all of you though. This will be a tough adjustment....you're adding a NEW person to your home, with new likes/dislikes/needs and the new person can't communicate and one of the other people can only communicate at a very rudimentary basis....it's tough, but you guys WILL make it through and you'll have given her an awesome gift of a sibling. :phew sorry...I didn't realize I was writing a book here! :heart :hug

[olive]

My dd just recently became a big sister and one thing to remember (because I forgot) is that ur older one is still little...having a newborn made dd seem so big and I started to expect too much of her in some ways. As far as adjusting to another one around it has been busy but dd loves to be my helper and I did what the others said and try not to force anything which makes it nice to see them discovering each other in their own time. DD also enjoyed finding a present for the baby (b4 it came) and at the hospital the baby gave dd a present (a craft toy to use at the hospital).

[jblairosu]

I'm so glad you posted this because it is really stressing me out right now. Reading this thread with lots of interest!!!

[Aerynne]

Did it three years ago and about to do it again. About the only thing we did special was letting her watch the birth and getting her her own doula to help her during the birth. I showed her birth videos leading up to that, too. We didn't do any gifts or anything else like that. I used to let her pick ds's outfit for the day, though- she loved that.