PDA

View Full Version : Co-sleeping with a 2 year old & a newborn

bananacake
04-21-2009, 07:03 PM
I'm looking for some advice about 7 months in advance :)

Our mattress is on the floor and Bear's crib mattress is next to our mattress. He starts off the night on his mattress, but wakes to nurse and climb all over us. Honestly, I do not wake up if he climbs on me. I woke up last night, needing to use the bathroom, and he was in a deep sleep on my calves :giggle I just sleep right through it.

So how do we make this work with a newborn? Bear (who will be 27.5 months when Baby-on-the-way arrives) did not co-sleep until he was 5.5 months. He slept horribly in a pack 'n play, and then transitioned to his crib, but at 5.5 months, he was too big & strong to stay swaddled and would not sleep if he wasn't in our bed. When he started crawling, we put the beds on the floor.

We sleep on a full-sized bed (is that the other name for a double?). And I don't want to kick DH out because I don't sleep well without him there. It's not even that I need to be touching him, but my subconscious knows he's not there :giggle I don't think a bigger bed is an option. As it is, we cannot fit a full-sized box spring up the stairs. I don't think a queen mattress would fit up the stairs, but maybe it would.

I was thinking of starting the baby in a co-sleeper of some sort, but I drove myself crazy with that last time. Bear was a horrible sleeper from the get-go, and no amount of training or "No Cry Sleep Solution" changed that. The other tricky thing is that Bear will not get his own room. The other 2 bedrooms are on another floor and I'm not comfortable having him that far away. So likely, we will section off part of the office (which is next to the bedroom) for his bedroom whenever he is ready for it.

Help? Advice? How have others dealt with this transition, especially with non-night weaned, high needs kids? I'll try to NW him prior to November, but who knows.
klpmommy
04-21-2009, 07:06 PM
i sleep this way:

R in crook of arm,me, S. they are always on the same side at night.

S nurses, but will sit upthen lay down on my arm. i then wiggle out so that i am touching her

i admit it isn't the most comfy, but it is the best i've come up with
bananacake
04-21-2009, 07:11 PM
I should add this to the OP. We sleep on a full-sized bed (is that the other name for a double?). And I don't want to kick DH out because I don't sleep well without him there. It's not even that I need to be touching him, but my subconscious knows he's not there :giggle I don't think a bigger bed is an option.
DoulaClara
04-21-2009, 07:32 PM
It sounds like you might need something that would keep a newborn and smaller baby a bit more isolated, but still right there with you. Maybe a Moses basket near the side of the bed you are on? I'd recommend an Arms Reach (or even the AR travel bed- it's smaller and more compact) but it also sounds like your mattress is on the floor if you can't get the box spring up the stairs.

Plus, by late this fall, I bet Bear will be on a whole different plane, in terms of sleep! He may still be on a mattress in your room, but he might be a more sound sleeper.
deena
04-21-2009, 07:34 PM
Pushing two mattresses together might be a solution. We've done that before and it's fairly comfortable. Definitely more comfortable than not having enough room.
Rabbit
04-21-2009, 09:32 PM
Buy a queen size mattress. It's all we did.
bananacake
04-22-2009, 08:52 AM
Buy a queen size mattress. It's all we did.


I've never bought a piece of furniture before. If I pay for it, and they deliver it, but it won't fit up the stairs, will they give me a refund?
klpmommy
04-22-2009, 08:55 AM
a mattress is much more flexible than a box spring. You can ask when you shop if they will refund it if they can't get it up the stairs. You could also buy another full mattress that is the same height & put it next to the one you currently have to make a really big bed. Actually, even a twin and a full is big, that is what we did with P&E for a long time.
bananacake
04-22-2009, 09:09 AM
a mattress is much more flexible than a box spring. You can ask when you shop if they will refund it if they can't get it up the stairs. You could also buy another full mattress that is the same height & put it next to the one you currently have to make a really big bed. Actually, even a twin and a full is big, that is what we did with P&E for a long time.


I forgot to mention the bedroom is pretty small. And L-shaped with a staircase in the middle of one wall. I'll have to take measurements later when Bear's not sleeping in there. If we get a queen, the crib mattress will no longer fit where it is, but we could try & put it somewhere else in the room.
mom2_AthruZ
04-22-2009, 09:26 AM
Like Kimberly we had our full sized(double) mattress and boxspring on the floor. We turned it so that what has been the side was now the head of the bed and the other side was now the foot of the bed. Then we took a twin matress and box spring and pushed it flush at the foot of the full. :phew Did that make sense? It made a nice king sized bed. We had ours pushed up against the wall and that is where E slept, between me and the wall until she was a toddler. We did get a king sized bed before ACE was born but if we hadn't we would have just had Emi in between us and Ace between myself and that wall.

Now we have all 5 of us in the king bed with a bed rail on my side since there isn't a wall we can push the bed up against. Z sleeps on the side with the bed rail and then Emi and Ace are in the middle. Think sardines and you have our family bed! ;)

I hope you're able to find something that works. :yes
ValiantJoy07
05-04-2009, 01:10 PM
Just sending some hope your way- dd night weaned on her own last month- I did use some NCSS "pently pull off" stuff with her several months before (to shorten night nursing sessions) and then when nursing started to bug me I increased it at night (not on purpose just because nursing laying down annoys the life out of me)- she hasn't insisted on night nursing and I don't offer. I snuggle her or put her between DH and I, roll over and tell her it's timet o slepe and pretend to sleep- she goes back to sleep too... :shrug3
bananacake
05-04-2009, 01:43 PM
Thank you :heart We are working on gently nightweaning Bear, especially since night-nursing tends to cause mild uterine contractions, which are not only uncomfortable, but make me feel paranoid. Generally, I don't let me nurse during the night until 6 or 630 AM, unless he is having a food reaction and is tossing and turning a lot (like last night!).
naturemama1
05-05-2009, 02:49 AM
We have also had good luck scooting a toddler down to the foot of our bed, after falling asleep. :)
MamaPepper
05-05-2009, 05:03 AM
I sleep on a full, no husband, but both 2 and 3 y.o. tend to end up in bed with me most nights. I've tried having them sleep on the floor next to the bed. . doesn't work all of the time. Otherwise, I generally just keep baby close and keep an arm around his head for when the 2 y.o. gets restless and floppy. They both start out in their bed though, so when it gets too uncomfortable, I will just carry them back to their bed. :shrug3