I'm Angry.

[Blue-EyedLady]

So. Very. Frustrated. And. Angry.

I'm angry that DS's diapers failed us again, and the bed is soaked less than 3 hours after bedtime.
I'm angry that the mattress is soaked because the waterproof mattress pad is in the wash after last night's soaking.
I'm angry that the mattress pad will take 3 days to dry because there's no good place to dry it, and I'm not allowed to have a clothesline.
I'm angry that I have to clean the mattress AGAIN, because it's not even my mattress, so I have to take extra good care of it.
I'm angry that now I have to sleep on the tiny twin mattress with DS while the Queen bed dries.
I'm angry that DS won't go back to sleep, so I can't sleep either.
I'm angry that no one else can get DS to go to sleep except me.
I'm angry that DS can't ever seem to go to sleep without abusing me first by kicking me in the crotch or stomach, hitting and pinching my breasts and arms, and pulling my hair or clothes.
I'm angry that I can't ever seem to get comfortable in the bed and now have chronic neck pain.
I'm angry that despite having nursed on both sides twice, DS is now screaming for more milk, and there just isn't any left.
I'm angry that in the 3 hours since bedtime, he's already woken up 3 times to nurse.
I'm angry that the child won't eat enough during the day and needs to nurse so much at night.
I'm angry that I can't seem to find foods that he'll eat during the day because he's a picky toddler and allergic to everything.
I'm angry that I can't eat anything because I'm nursing an allergic toddler, and it's destroying my body.
I'm angry that I can't give my child anything for his teething pain because he's allergic to everything.
I'm angry that God decided the best way for babies to have teeth is to cause them extreme pain.
I'm angry that DS has been teething for his whole life, and it's apparently never going to end.

So, yeah, I'm angry, and there's no end in sight. DS is angry too. He can keep crying for all I care - there's nothing I can do to fix it anyway.

[CapeTownMommy]

:hugheart :hugheart I'm so sorry you're struggling like this.

Have you tried an amber teething necklace for the pain?

[Blue-EyedLady]

:hugheart :hugheart I'm so sorry you're struggling like this.

Have you tried an amber teething necklace for the pain?


I have one coming from Michelle, but it will be a while before it ships.

[La Loba]

:yes2 I totally and completely understand. :yes2 Every single line. :yes2 Been there, doing that.

:hugheart

[BlessedBlue]

:cry :hugheart :hugheart

It's ok to feel angry.

[Blue Aurora]

:hug2

[BlessedBlue]

Do you have any fleece blankets?  Do you have access to extra towels?

When the waterproof pad is AWOL, sandwiching some towels between 2 fleece blankets might give you some extra protection.

Is KJ a side-sleeper?  I don't think there's a diaper in the world that can handle side sleeping.  :hug

I really wish I lived closer to you. :sigh

[MarynMunchkins]

:hugheart

[Mama Bird]

Maybe we can help you feel better with a brainstorming session?

1. What kinds of diapers have you tried?
2. Is there any way you can get a teething necklace faster? Then you'd have two.
3. Can you get a nap today?

What other things can we try to help you work through? :hugheart

[Blue-EyedLady]

BlessedBlue - yes, DS is a side sleeper. We're using BumGenius Diapers, which wick through the leg openings with a side sleeper. I have wool pants over that, but we get compression wicking through the wool, even though it's lanolized and felted. I do own fleece blankets. They're in storage somewhere inaccessible. I've tried towels before - he soaks through those just as quickly as sheets. :shrug3 I think he thinks it's a challenge to see how much wet laundry he can create in one night!

MamaBee - thank you! I really appreciate your questions! I want to feel better! My only other diaper option is prefolds with covers. I don't have $$ to get anything else right now. Ditto the teething necklace. No money, and I'd have to order it online anyway, so it would still take a while to arrive. DH works today, so I can't get help from him. I'm hoping for a nap, but we'll see how the day goes, KWIM? I'm working tomorrow and the next day, which means I have to cook 3 days worth of food today, as well as pack up for an overnight stay away from home.

What do I do with all of these angries? I usually don't feel angry first thing in the morning, but by halfway through the afternoon, I'm ANGRY and taking it out on everyone around me. By bedtime, I'm miserable. How do I get rid of the angries?

[Mama Bird]

Sunshine can help. Is it sunny today at your house? Can you go take a nice walk? Vitamin B can help with mood problems as well.

If it isn't sunny, or you don't have time to walk, how about some music? I really enjoy music. I crank up K-LOVE either on the radio in the kitchen, my mp3 player, or even on the computer and sing at the top of my lungs. It always makes me feel better.

Ok, so we need to find something more absorbent. We use prefolds and wool. Smiley is an all over sleeper. Back, tummy, sides, on top of me. :giggle You name it. We had some issues with leaking at night for a while. Sometimes I'd tuck a tri-folded washcloth into his diapers. That would help so much. Or, if you have a Dollar store available, in the car section they have some microfiber towels. Trifold one of those. They're really absorbent.

AFA the teething, how about teething tablets? Have you tried those? They gave Smiley some relief with the front teeth (before we got the amber) but seemed to not work quite as well on the back teeth. What about an ice cube or frozen BM/formula in a mesh feeder? Rubbing vanilla on the gums helped when my bigger kids were babies. We didn't have fancy cool amber necklaces back then. :P~

How about a felted wool pad under him as he sleeps? A big men's sweater would work, maybe? It wouldn't have to be pretty. Then it could dry during the day and be used for a few days before you'd have to wash it.

[Blue-EyedLady]

Sunshine can help. Is it sunny today at your house? Can you go take a nice walk? Vitamin B can help with mood problems as well.

If it isn't sunny, or you don't have time to walk, how about some music? I really enjoy music. I crank up K-LOVE either on the radio in the kitchen, my mp3 player, or even on the computer and sing at the top of my lungs. It always makes me feel better.

Ok, so we need to find something more absorbent. We use prefolds and wool. Smiley is an all over sleeper. Back, tummy, sides, on top of me. :giggle You name it. We had some issues with leaking at night for a while. Sometimes I'd tuck a tri-folded washcloth into his diapers. That would help so much. Or, if you have a Dollar store available, in the car section they have some microfiber towels. Trifold one of those. They're really absorbent.

AFA the teething, how about teething tablets? Have you tried those? They gave Smiley some relief with the front teeth (before we got the amber) but seemed to not work quite as well on the back teeth. What about an ice cube or frozen BM/formula in a mesh feeder? Rubbing vanilla on the gums helped when my bigger kids were babies. We didn't have fancy cool amber necklaces back then. :P~

How about a felted wool pad under him as he sleeps? A big men's sweater would work, maybe? It wouldn't have to be pretty. Then it could dry during the day and be used for a few days before you'd have to wash it.


Today is overcast, but you're right. I should probably get outside more. It would be good for both of us! It's just so hard to find the time to do so.

I love music - I should try that. However, I live with my mom, and she is bothered by "background music." It interferes with the music already playing in her head! She can do classical music, but that's not really gonna rev me up, IYKWIM. :giggle Maybe when she goes out, or I do...

I have the diapers stuffed with a hemp insert and microfiber doubler. I have a shammy I tried once, but I didn't think it worked any better than the microfiber doublers. And I heard you need to be careful with not putting those next to his skin.

Teething tablets have a lactose base, and he reacts to them. I do use teething gel on him, but we're working on 2-yr molars, and he won't let me get back there without a fight. I do give him frozen stuff sometimes during the day, but it's too messy for night. Half the time he rejects it anyway. I've tried vanilla (I have my own home-brewed vanilla because we have a corn allergy), but it didn't really have an effect.

AFA a wool pad goes, I'd need to cover the entire queen bed - I'm sure you understand! :lol I do have some sweaters I was going to make into woolies for him. But if he leaks through his wool pants, wouldn't a wool pad have the same problems?

[newday]

I wish I knew how to get rid of angry also :shrug3 ! And to teach it to my little ducks! The only thing that helps me is to manually focus on each irritation and start thanking God for the goodness in those things. I suppose some would find that unrealistic, but it truly helps change my perspective.

Mama bee has some good input, I hope it helps you!!!

:heart :heart :heart

[Mama Bird]

Hmmm. Okay. I hate overcast days, but I always open my curtains, even on yucky days. Because God made that day for a purpose, and I always try to find something beautiful about His creation. For example, I'm always amazed by how many different shades of gray He made the clouds. He could have just made one shade, but He chose to make everything from almost white to deep, brooding gray. So beautiful.

Music. Let's see. I can't live without my music. Do you have an mp3 player and earbuds? I tell you, I go through earbuds like crazy. I need to hear my little ones, though, so I usually just wear one side and let the other dangle. Then the music can be in your head as well. :P~

The whole queen?!? Your little guy must be a mover and a shaker. Are you changing him at night? Smiley gets royally peeved if I change him, so I usually don't. But maybe your guy just needs a night change. Maybe investing in another waterproof cover is the answer. We just got a new mattress and we bought a waterproof cover at Target that has PUL on it, so it isn't crunchy. It washes and dries (in the dryer!) fast.

I know they make some waterproof pads that lay on top of the sheets for kids who have night-time accidents. Mom used them with some of us. Then you're just washing something smaller, without undoing your whole bed. Maybe you could buy a waterproof cover for a twin mattress and cut it into thirds, hem it, and put one under him each night? I think my mom made something like that when my grandpa was bedridden.

Tell me to hush if I'm not helping you at all. I just "hear" the anger and frustration in your post, and I can so relate. :hug2

[StrangeTraveller]

:yes2 I totally and completely understand. :yes2 Every single line. :yes2 Been there, doing that.

:hugheart


:yes2 :hugheart

[BlessedBlue]

Rescue Remedy is great for mamas too. :)

What I have done for my angries in the past (non-pregnant): motrin, fish oil, st johns wort. Also making sure I have little bits of protein throughout the day - keeps the blood sugar from crashing. Cal/Mag at night - I might not get enough sleep, might as well make the sleep I do get count!

What I am currently doing for my angries (pregnant): SAMe, fish oil, flax seed oil, protein throughout day, cal/mag.

Deep breaths - telling myself that I'm not trapped, that I'm not stuck, that I am creative and smart and can think of a solution.

Of course, you know, it doesn't always work. That's why I call you. ;) Phone buddies can help talk you down. :tu

Brainstorming... Would a felted plastic table cloth work for a barrier on the mattress? You can buy those pretty cheap. May be a bit "crunchy" but at this point I think you'll deal with "crunchy" if it means less work for you overall. :think Put the tablecloth down, some towels, and then the sheet. The sheet will still get wet, but that's easier to deal with than a wet mattress. Does Wally World still have fabric? Maybe you can find some fleece cheap. You don't even have to hem it! It won't fray. Use a couple of layers since it isn't the "good stuff."

I know you're resistant to this idea. I'm not sure if it's because of you, or because of KJ, so I guess you can evaluate this idea for yourself. Change the boy's diaper 1/2 way through the night. Take off the wet, put on a dry, and maybe that will save you the grief of a wet mattress in the morning.

ABoo has woken up every morning of his life at around 4am because his bladder is full. If I can convince him to go ahead and pee (in his diaper, in the potty, wherever!) and give him a fresh diaper, I can usually get him to go back to sleep for a few more hours. I make sure that I don't turn on any lights, don't talk, don't stimulate. If I don't, there WILL be laundry to do in the AM. Sometimes he won't even go back to sleep if he's wet. :/ Sometimes he won't go back to sleep if I wait too long. :yawn So this means that I have gotten up with him every night/morning for 3+ years. Not even now, when he sleeps all night long on his own, in his own room, do I get out of this duty. :hug

[Blue-EyedLady]

Rescue Remedy! :doh Of course! I used it on DS, but didn't think to use it on myself.

Ok - here's the deal on changing diapers during the night. I actually don't object to the concept. I fall back asleep easily enough. But DS HATES to have his diaper changed during the night. That's actually what the problem was last night. Once I realized that he had soaked the bed (after only being in it for 3 hours, mind you), of course I changed him and stripped the sheets. While I was working on the bed, DH cuddled and shh'ed a loudly screaming DS. He never did calm down from that diaper change until DH took him for a drive. So that's why I object to nighttime changes. It means DS will be screaming the whole time, and may not stop, even when we're done with the change. It doesn't matter whether I turn on lights or not, he wakes up fully when I start the change.

I have a couple vinyl tableclothes in storage someplace. I don't think I could find it right now, though. Maybe I can squeeze a few pennies together to get some fleece from Wally-World.

MamaBee - you have awesome ideas! :tu I have an iPod Shuffle around here someplace that would totally work - one earbud in and the other one dangling. I might even get motivated to do housework if I have music! :think Now to get DH to load it with good music for me...

And I like your idea of altering a twin size mattress pad. I need coverage for the whole width of the bed but not the whole length. Oh - and the reason I need that much coverage is partly me. :O I like to flip over in bed when we switch sides nursing. So I stay put and move DS over my body to the other side of the bed. Does that make sense? And a smaller pad might actually get dried in the drier. The queen size one just balls up and doesn't dry. DS is taking a nap right now on a sweater on the twin mattress. We'll see how that goes...

[BlessedBlue]

Yay! A nap!