Is it unreasonable to expect a 1 year old to STTN?

[Blue-EyedLady]

DS will be 1 YO in 2 weeks. I really thought that by this time he'd be STTN, or at least longer than 2 hours at a stretch. Actually, I don't even care if *HE* STTN, I just want to STTN myself, KWIM? :shifty

He's never been a good sleeper, so maybe I'm being unrealistic, but he still nurses 6+ times a night (from midnight to 8 AM). Lately, I've been going to bed at 10:00 and DH stays up with him until he's finally tired enough to sleep. Then the all night nursing marathon begins. :sigh I think he gets about 10-11 hours of sleep total during a 24 hour period.

It's so frustrating when people tell me that after the kids go to bed is a great time to get stuff done. :banghead At this point, I seem to need more sleep than DS does!

[Yuliana]

I don't know but my 2nd didn't and at 25 months old today still wakes up to nurse on some days.

[klpmommy]

some kids have a much greater need for nighttime connections than others. E was very much like that. The good news is that once she did start to sttn, she rarely needed me. The bad news is how old she was when that started to happen. :hug I do know that with S if I lay down with her she wants to nurse more than if I am in a different bed in the same room. :shrug But with E that didn't matter one bit, she *needed* me at night.

[MaybeGracie]

I felt the same way two weeks before DS's first birthday. When he turned one, it was like a switch flipped and he went from nursing all.night.long to sleeping straight through. It was amazing. But then other children don't sleep through until they reach two years or later. I wish I had some advice for you. I remember how frustrating it is. :hugheart

[Elora]

DS wakes up every 2 hours from 9 p.m. to 5a.m. He'll sleep one 3 1/2 hours stretch from 5- 8:30 a.m. and then he's up for the day.

He will be 24 months in 9 days.

He's never once slept through the night.

Did I expect him to? Yes. Certainly by now.

But what we expect doesn't always equate to what happens.

I just read klpmommy post as I was typing, and ITA with her. I am pretty certain ds just wakes for connection. I've tried everything and eliminated any and every potential reason for his waking. I think he just needs me.

[StewardofLOs]

DS is 16 mos and wakes up every two hours from about 8:30-6:30, with a 2-3 hour nap during the day. I've found that I handle it better when I stop expecting him to STTN. We make sure all his needs are met (is he teething? is he stuffy? did he get enough "big movement" during the day? is he eating enough during the day? does he need to go to bed sooner?) and then just try to accept it. He needs me (or daddy) at night, and we'll be there for him each time he does. We'll occassionally try a strategy to get him to soothe himself back to sleep--to make sure we're not missing something--but I figure he'll do it eventually when he's ready (just like self-feeding, drinking from a sippy, drinking from a straw, etc.) :shrug

Some nights/weeks/months can be so hard, I know! :hug2 But this too shall pass! :heart

[Blue Aurora]

My youngest just started sleeping through the night at 2 years and 9 months. My oldest did it at 12 months. I think all kiddos are different but it's not fun when you're in the midst of it. :hug2

[inesperada]

Ds1 didn't sleep through consistently until 20 months. Ds2 did for a while and then quit around 14 months and hasn't regularly again yet..we're waiting on some teeth and to get over the cold and then with any luck we'll get some sleep...

[Rabbit]

Simon only started sleeping through the night a few weeks ago, and he's 2.5.

[Calliope]

In reality, I think very few one year olds sleep through the night. I had an eye-opener watching a thread on an anonymous mainstream board. Some lamented that her 11 month old didn't STTN and every responder (like 20+ people) confessed that their kids didn't either at that age. :shrug

[Rabbit]

There's a lot we've done to make it comfortable, easily bearable, and for everybody to get as much sleep as possible. It didn't mean two and a half years of sleep deprivation.

[cindergretta]

Is it unreasonable to expect? Yes. :yes2 Is it unreasonable to want? No. :no

I think the ones who sleep through the night at 1 or so are the exceptions, not the rule. I've had one who slept through the night at 1. But she slept through (6ish hours) from about 2 months or so. S might be my next to do it. She sleeps 4-5 hours now. None of the others. So right now, about 1/3 of mine have/do! :giggle

[Blue-EyedLady]

Is it unreasonable to expect? Yes. :yes2 Is it unreasonable to want? No. :no


This made me smile - thank you!

Most of the time I'm ok with him waking up at night, but lately I've just been SO tired! I feel like I can barely make it through the day. Lots of other stressors in my life right now on top of everything else, so I'm sure that's a factor. And oh, yes, he's teething - teeth numbers 11-16 are coming, I think. And he's constantly stuffy. He wakes up coughing regularly. :sick I've tried everything I know of to clear it up, and he's still got it.

I'm going to keep wanting sleep, but I guess I'll give it another 6 months before I start thinking of it actually happening... Thanks, all, for your wisdom! I'm glad to know I'm not alone in this!

[MarynMunchkins]

None of my kids were STTN at one. Even the one that had been started waking up. :shrug IME, it's due to teething.

My last two both started sleeping all night once all their teeth were in. :)

[AmyDoll]

Nicholas just started STTN. He's 2.5 and newly weaned.

[katiekind]

Yes, even people who do the rigorous sleep training stuff (a la babywise, baby whisperer and all that) find their little ones start waking up with teething issues and developmental stuff (practicing standing up in their sleep and then coming awake) at 11 and 12 months old. And twelve months does just seem to be an intense need-mommy age, whereas looking a few months down the road the spike in needs mellows out somewhat.

If you're exhausted a lot, it might help to go back to your mother-of-a-baby playbook and nap when the baby naps, stuff like that.

[MtnMama]

Pfft. My dd will be 3 Friday and sttn last night and it was the first time in 6 months she's done that. It had just starting happening when ds was born... drumroll please... 6 months ago (:lol) and then she started waking every few hours. :yawn

Some kids do, some kids don't. I don't think it's unreasonable to expect some 1YO to sttn... but others have more difficulty. :hug

[ReedleBeetle]

Isaac is 3.5 years old and doesn't STTN yet. He will some day. :lol

[Herbwifemama]

Dd is nearly three and still sometimes doesn't STTN. :shrug At 12 months, it was still total babyland for us (meaning, sleeping like a baby, and I don't mean that the way the standard understanding of that phrase is ;)), and she became fairly needy through her second year of life too, and it didn't really start to look better until after she turned two. I know you are SO tired right now mama, I do! :hugheart But it DOES get better, but IME, not for a while yet. I feel like I was lied to. I expected a fairly well sleeping baby around a year. But it really didn't happen like that, and I don't think it happens like that for MOST kids, unless they've been CIO. I asked here about when people's kids started sleeping better, and overwhelmingly, people said around 2-3 years, and one mama said age 5, so I just held that up as the standard, so if it happened sooner, it would be gravy. And it did happen sooner than 5. :) We need to dispel this myth that normal kids are STTN as babies!

[Lantern Light Mama]

My kids didn't until they were both two. :shrug