Teaching a preschooler to sleep through the night.

[Dana Joy]

We have made HUGE strides in our nighttime routine. This past summer he was sleeping with me and waking up to nurse every 2-3 hours. Now he is in his own bed in his and Big Man's room, only nurses at bedtime and get up time, but he wakes up at least 2 times a night. He will not go back to sleep without me laying with him- and I feel like I am getting less sleep than when he was in my bed. (moving him back is not an option- STB DH wants him out of my bed when we get married ;) ) How can I teach him to settle himself? I have seriously considered the "Supernanny" thing of sitting on the floor next to his bed and transitioning to being further and further away. Any ideas?

[gabriola]

:popcorn

[simplegirl]

i searched ttc and saw you posted about it...read my thread in this forum and tell me what ya think! if you want to of course :shifty

[zak]

:popcorn Reid sounds a lot like your Little Man. :yes

[freshwaterfish]

For me it was all about having a fun routine. I put together a picture chart (found pics on google images) for each step of the bedtime routine and hung it on the fridge. He loves knowing exactly what bedtime means, and takes the lead in making it happen. That sense of independence very quickly turned around the bedtime struggles... :yes Here's what we do, but you can adapt it to meet your own needs:

7 PM
1. Potty & Jammies on
2. Vitamins and drink of water
3. Brush and floss teeth
4. Bedtime story
5. Prayer time and tuck in.
6. Hugs and kisses
7. Lights out

We do it in this exact order every night, and he goes to bed with no fuss, and goes to sleep, sleeps through the night, and we rarely have problems unless he's sick or having bedtime fears (shadows, spiders, etc, etc LOL). May I suggest having your new DH a part of the routine... Brent does the bedtime story and they both really cherish that one on one time together every night. I think it will make the marriage/stepdad transition much easier... :yes

April

[ziggyplaid]

subbing...my 1 year old sleeps through the night, but my almost four year old still won't! :scratch

[raquel]

I recently borrowed Elizabeth Pantley's book called No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers. It has tons of good ideas in it and maybe there would be something for your sitch??

[Dana Joy]

Thanks guys- I posted this exact same thread on my local AP group and got some very concerned people asking me if my stbdh was "really AP" and that maybe I should rethink adding him to our family if he is so mean and cruel that he wants an innocent 3 yo to sleep all by his lonesome. :jawdrop :jawdrop

Here are my thoughts- after reading mamamel's TCC thread about sleeping I have been thinking along the lines of what the older cultures did- and the fact that I agree that a need for a warm loving body is a genuine need. I remember reading alot about siblings sleeping together, and honestly that is how Big Man and Punky transfered out of my bed at the ages of 2 and 4 with no issues. They slept together. The bottom bunk that Little Man is in now is a full size bed- so Big Man and he could fit in it easily. So I asked Big Man first and he said he would love to cuddle with Little Man and then I presented the idea to Little Man and he got a huge smile on his face and said yes.

So in addition to a routine that I will involve Mr J in, and reading Pantley's book we will be trying sibling co-sleeping!!!

[ellies mom]

I think moving the two boys in together is a great idea. And it very well may take care of the night awakenings. At least from the perspective that you might not be aware of them because he will wake up, his brother will be there and he will go back to bed.

I'm kind of in the same place with my 4yo DD. Right now I'm still sitting with her until she falls asleep but during the nights if she wakes up, I go into her room and tell her I'm there and then curl up on the foot of her bed until she falls back asleep and then I go back to my room although honestly sometimes I do doze off for awhile. There are still nights where she wakes up 2 times or more but I really think there is something going on so on those nights (mainly because I need to sleep), I either crawl in with her or bring her back to my bed. But as she has gotten the hang of it, she is waking up less and less. So now, most nights she sleeps through. Which is such a relief because we've got a new baby coming in April and I need to start this whole thing all over again.

I do want to mention that I really do think there is a lot of individuality involved. Some kids are simply going to be better sleepers than others. :shrug I'm not the best sleeper and my mother isn't the best sleeper. So, Ellie definitely comes by it honorably. Maybe this next child will take after her Daddy.

[freshwaterfish]

That's an awesome update! :tu Sounds like the perfect way to ease him out of the family bed and into the .... family bed... :giggle

As a sidenote, sometimes AP people forget the big picture. Doing what works for each family is just as an important part of AP as co-sleeping... :yes

[simplegirl]

That's an awesome update! :tu Sounds like the perfect way to ease him out of the family bed and into the .... family bed... :giggle

As a sidenote, sometimes AP people forget the big picture. Doing what works for each family is just as an important part of AP as co-sleeping... :yes


agreed... :hugheart sorry you were given comments like that on another board.

[erinee]

So in addition to a routine that I will involve Mr J in, and reading Pantley's book we will be trying sibling co-sleeping!!!

:heart

We got Megan to sleep on her own by having her & Zach room together. They had bunk beds, but she often ended up climbing up into his bed. So what you are doing makes perfect sense to me!

As a sidenote, sometimes AP people forget the big picture. Doing what works for each family is just as an important part of AP as co-sleeping...

:yes :hug2

[Sarai]

Reading this with interest......I so wish DS had a sibling to cosleep with! I've often thought it would be the ideal solution.

organique gal, I love your routine- I think I'm going to steal (erhm, borrow ;)) it.

[zak]

Reid has been staying in his bed more and more (twin in our room). :yes

My "plan" is to move both boys upstairs once F is ready (weaned, likely). The sibling thing really helps, I think. R is already talking about having a room with F. :heart

[simplegirl]

I'm hoping that my boys will co-sleep/co-room together too! My DH, for some reason, is conflicted about putting them in a full bed together in a couple years when DS2 is old enough. I don't know what his deal is, he'd rather them have twin beds (our ceilings are too low for bunks) and to me that's a waist of $ b/c we already have two full frames waiting for them when they get bigger and have separate rooms. What's the big deal of two brothers, most likely 2 and 4 then, sleeping together in a full bed???

[TrinMama]

Sounds like you found a great way to transition. My girls are sharing a room now, not a bed because I KNOW they'll fight. I sit in the room with them while the fall asleep (they are younger than yours), and am going to start gradually moving out. Not in a super rigid "supernanny" way, just a slow, easy, calm way so that when baby 3 is born I can spend more time with the baby. If it doesn't work, tho, I'll scrap it.

I'm grateful to read everyone's ideas. The support here for everyone is great.

I hope you are successful with your youngest ds...how is it going so far for you?