Am i being unrealistic?

[CrazyChick]

Ds is 2.5 and currently our prebedtime routine is books and nursing on the bed for about 30mins and then i lie down with him and play lullabies and he goes off to sleep usually fairly easily but occassionally it takes up to 40mins.

I am pregnant with number 2 (just 8weeks preg so still early days) and am wondering if i am being unrealistic to think that i can carry on the same routine with a newborn around as well - dh works shifts inc nights so i have to have a bedtime routine that i can do on my own as he is regularly not there - plus ds wouldnt tolerate daddy putting him to bed anyway!

Any ideas or experiences? TIA

[Joanne]

Ds is 2.5 and currently our prebedtime routine is books and nursing on the bed for about 30mins and then i lie down with him and play lullabies and he goes off to sleep usually fairly easily but occassionally it takes up to 40mins.

Yes, I think it's unrealistic to think you'll be able to do this.

I, personally, would not take that much time, especially nursing, for a 2.5 year old.

[CrazyChick]

Hmmm...thanks for that - i thought that might be the case! Has anyone got any experiences of how they managed to get a toddler to bed with a newborn also around that they dont mind sharing? - i feel a bit lost with this one and cant see how i can do it! :shifty

[Katigre]

Well, I think the first thing to do is get the bedtime routine down to a shorter duration, and work on your toddler being able to fall asleep on his own without you there - that will free you up if (when ;)) the baby needs attending to when your DS is falling asleep. Make as much of his bedtime routine as possible something you can do with a baby in your arms or nearby.

Are you planning to tandem nurse or do you want to wean during pregnancy?

I think a shorter and more doable routine would look like this:
PJ's/brush teeth
1 book
Prayers
Lullaby CD, where you stay in the room for the first song and then leave as he falls asleep (you could hold/nurse a baby while he lays and listens to the music, and eventually get to where you turn on the CD and leave the room right away instead of waiting for the first song to be over)

I would work to eliminate nursing to sleep b/c with a newborn and a husband not home at bedtime that won't be too feasible and could lead to stress and resentment on your part, especially in the early days.

You could eliminate nursing to sleep by first limiting duration, unlatching him before he's fully asleep and patting his back or cuddling him instead as he falls asleep (moving towards him falling asleep to the CD instead), then move nursing to earlier in the bedtime routine - before prayers or before books (or even eliminate it from the nighttime routine altogether).

HTH!