Yelling Recover for August: brainstorming ways to help us stop yelling

[canadiyank]

We haven't done it in a few months, so here's an August thread. We are here in any stage of yelling and yelling improvement. :) Let us encourage one another and brainstorm ideas to help us decrease and eliminate yelling.

Here's a link to the original thread...http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/mb/index.php?topic=106942.0

This (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/mb/index.php?topic=112206.0) thread's OP has a list of several phases we identified that we were going through and striving toward. A helpful overview. :tu

[me]

Thanks Meghan! This couldnt come at a better time for me.
I dont know if anyone remembers but I was in on the first threads and they had actually helped me stop yelling on a regular basis (I rarely yelled).
I was wondering if anyone had any new suggestions for me, now that I have begun yelling again. Even if I dont yell from using the previously learned tools I still get all wound up inside.

Once dd weaned and my cycle came back I have been yelling. I know the two are related because I hadnt been yelling before and I can identify now (thanks to the older threads) that this isnt external it is without a doubt internal and way more than usual food reactions. This kind of just crept up on me :scratch
Certain times of the month are worse but I cant really pin point it because my cycles are never consistent. Ugh! I really need some help, I snap so easily and have to go to another room to make my heart stop racing, it feels just awful. If I cant find something natural that helps im going to the doctor. I hate never knowing when Im going to feel like a huge ball of stress.
Ive started excersising regularly but I still get the weird surge of anxiety during the month that goes just as fast as it came :blush :shrug

[Nightingale]

I've really been noticing my tone of voice lately. When I hear myself sometimes, I try to think about how I would feel if someone talked to me in that tone, so I'm trying really hard to curb that. Even if it's not yelling, but just tone...I think about how I would feel if my dad talked to me that way, and that helps me. I'm going to try to keep up with this one.

[Tanyia]

I'm here....dd now looks at me when she does something wrong and closes her eyes or hides behind something.... :sick I think it's harder because I control myself sometimes and other times I just lose it...and so she doesn't know what to expect. :O

[mommyTay]

I'll join, our house has gotten horribly loud and stressed in the past 6 weeks. My foster kids are VERY LOUD, so I find myself getting louder hoping anyone will hear me, IF they are even listening :hissyfit . I have yelled over them so much, my throat is hurting. :cry I am searching hard for alternate ways to get their attention, but with their background "baggage" its a huge challenge.

[Thia]

I have got to stop yelling. I have got to stop speaking in that "I am so very disappointed in you" tone. Help!
Some, not all, of my triggers: me being really tired, me trying to get her to comply to not incur the wrath of dad, repeated resistance from dd, everyone in the house needing something from me at the same time and my brain short circuiting.
I'm not going to bother going back to the other thread, I am just jumping in.

[me]

I'll join, our house has gotten horribly loud and stressed in the past 6 weeks. My foster kids are VERY LOUD, so I find myself getting louder hoping anyone will hear me, IF they are even listening :hissyfit . I have yelled over them so much, my throat is hurting. :cry I am searching hard for alternate ways to get their attention, but with their background "baggage" its a huge challenge.


That is a huge trigger for me too. One of the very few house rules is "inside voices". Its not just to teach manners but to also help me out.
My kids are like me too though. Even though they would yell and just be generally noisy all the time if I let them, they dont like it either. It's just to much. So much that we have a saying in our house. "It's too much". When one of us says this we know that it's time to calm things down. Even if its only due to the tv being to loud while the toddler bangs on a toy, as the dog is barking at the garbage collecter. I know to turn the tv off or take the dog outside when one of the kids says "its to much".
Or when all three kids run towards me yelling at the same time to be the one that gets heard first as they pull at me. I say "its to much" and the older kids know to stop and wait a second for me to regroup.
Preventing it from getting out of control is really the only way I can handle it without getting a stomach ache from it. As soon as one "starts" the noise thats when I have to get up and whisper to them so they have to quiet down to hear me. Or if they are too excited I take them aside. Its no fun yelling to oneself in an empty room :giggle Then once I have their attention we talk. Proactive is much better than reactive in my case. Some moms have no problem with noise and commotion so long as no one is getting hurt. And thats all fine and good, unfortunately my kids and myself must have some sensory issue to noise and someone always gets hurt if I don't control the noise level BEFORE it gets out of hand.
I hear you........

[Marsha]

I' sure this didn't have anythign to do with me growing as a person, but after taking Evening Primorose OIl for those crazy hormones (I'm 41, no ppaf, still nursing at 24 months) I don't even feel like yelling much.
It's a shame how much I used it to relieve my own stress.
Thought I'd throw that out there for thjose of you strugglign hormonally and thinking you're bad for yelling.

[Myrtle]

want to come back later

[Tanyia]

Thanks for the reminder. :phew I've been trying very hard to not 'blame' the pregnancy because I know after the baby comes it's going to get harder :jawdrop but I do feel like I have enough hormones for me, the baby, and about 5 others right now.

[asher]

I'm in. I know mine is hormonal/depression related, but I'd still like to really put a hold on it. :blush

[The Tickle Momster]

I'm in. I know mine is hormonal/depression related, but I'd still like to really put a hold on it. :blush


Me too. :yes2 I started a thread recently about completing the paradigm shift. The replies have really helped me to think about why I want to be a gbp. I've had conversations with my dd about the golden rule. It's starting to sink in. If I wouldn't want someone to yell at me to get a point across, why would I yell at my children.

Now, having figured that out, doesn't mean I have perfected the art. I still have tough days. Last week I had a headache and kept trying to get the kids to keep it down. I ended up yelling "BE QUIET!!!". Not very effective.

Triggers for me, dd1's pokiness. Working on practicing A time and Mom time for doing things. Ds's incessant activity. The child cannot sit still, or find his own thing to do. He'll cling to me when I'm trying to make dinner, help another child, talk on the phone, etc. Dd2 talking constantly and loudly. She's 2 and very verbal, but good grief!

Ok, so solutions to the above triggers: dd1 - give her more time tocomplete a task so I don't have to rush her. ds - be prepared with activities for him to do, and participate with him. dd2 - giv her my attentions quickly so she doesn't end up yelling over my other conversation.

to the pp me - being aware that it is happening is a good start. I find that now, when I have that out of body experience of yelling I know it's the hormones etc. and try to walk away/stop. It takes more than 5 deep breaths to move on, but at least I'm not screaming at my kids. :hug you can do it!

[me]

I' sure this didn't have anythign to do with me growing as a person, but after taking Evening Primorose OIl for those crazy hormones (I'm 41, no ppaf, still nursing at 24 months) I don't even feel like yelling much.
It's a shame how much I used it to relieve my own stress.
Thought I'd throw that out there for thjose of you strugglign hormonally and thinking you're bad for yelling.

ill have to make sure it doesnt somehow effect my seasonal allergies and try that out! I read it also helps with asthmatic coughs which I think im currently experiencing with my allergies.......

[marathonmom]

Me, I like that saying "It's too much!". That would help a lot around here. I have a dd with Aspergers who would benefit from having
that phrase to use too.

And Marsha, thank you for bringing up the Primrose Oil. So many times, I would yell bec. I was depressed, bec. I was stressed out, and I would always feel so remorseful later. It was such a cycle. Now that I'm taking St. John's Wort, I am able to deal more firmly and gently
with the girls, instead of hiding from them, or just reacting to them.

I think we always have to evaluate our own stress level, and what we can do to keep ourselves healthy.

[Raspberries]

I get incredibly overwhelmed during certain cycle phases. Mostly around ovulation. I just feel this intensity welling up inside of me and it just comes blurting out of me. One thing I have been trying to do is warn DH that it's coming so he can intervene for me when he's here. Like if I can sense myself getting that physical feeling I'll tell him, "Honey, I think that time of the month where I get upset easily is here (or coming very soon) please be on point for DD so that I don't snap unnecessarily."

That sounds more like a band aid, but it at least I then I'm less likely to yell.

[Six Little Feet]

I'm in. I am struggling to be calm. The new baby has added a bit of stress to the day to day stuff.

[me]

I started taking my over the counter allergy tabs and St johns wart yesterday. Along with excersing. I havent had the wound up stomach in knots feeling at all today! And ontop of that the air has been level red so we havent been able to go outside for 3 days!
No yelling to control, no raising voice to fight, no frustration inside while doing so!
I cant believe how fast that was. I was so calm that today during the little ones nap when she started her screaching thing I was actually patting her to sleep and was sleepy myself! Usually im so stressed by holding it together while she screams that sleep is the last thing on my mind.
I can even tell that there is tension even in my normal voice and can correct it. I never realized that my normal voice had tension in it out of habit. :scratch I wonder if dh will notice a change when he gets home today in my voice? So strange but fantastic. Can't help but feel a little ashamed that I was so on the defensive of keeping my voice down and calming my nerves all by myself that I was carrying so much tension. But you know, no one would have known it because I was putting so much energy into not showing it. How unhealthy was that!

[canadiyank]

Oh me, that's an awesome update! :woohoo

[ShiriChayim]

:popcorn

[The Tickle Momster]

me -- that's GREAT! I'm so glad you found something to help. I wonder how many of us have some sort of imbalance going on.

I've been taking my cal/mag and sleeping much deeper at night. Today I feel much better and have been doing more than just hiding here behind my computer screen.

Have I gotten frustrated? yes. been a screaming banshee about it? no.

[me]

Thanks ladies.....

...Have I gotten frustrated? yes. been a screaming banshee about it? no.
:giggle One time while apologizing to dd we were talking about how I had made her feel and she said "I was like huh (made this face :hunh) you sounded like a rooster" :shifty

I had tried taking calcium and for some reason it made my tongue numb? Very strange. I too wonder how many of us do too. Im sure part of me cutting out things with hormones earlier had been one of the things that greatly helped. I could be way wrong scientifically, just a thought..........

[asher]

:giggle Rooster! LOL. Sounds like me. :) I'm glad to hear things are calming down for you.

I definitely had an imbalance going on after the birth of dd. Also, I had some major life altering events, that just blew me out of the water for awhile. When we moved here, it got the worst because dh became an Army Recruiter & was working really long hours. Depression runs in my family and I had tried so many things naturally to control it (including 5-htp). I eventually sought conventional treatment and it has changed so much. I do need to take moments to breathe and "be still," but before I would just explode. It was awful. I still beat myself up a little about the conventional meds, though.

I read Joanne's blog and that has really helped with the yelling. Coming here really helps, too. :)

[ShiriChayim]

I've really been struggling with sounding loving while firm. Evidently when I try to sound firm, I sound mean. I don't like that, but I'm having a rough time finding a happy medium.

[GrowingInGrace]

I've got to come back to this. I ratcheted up the yelling factor, but didn't realize it could be due to ovulation (I don't really have PMS symptoms, but sometimes I get the ovulation/mittleschmertz pain that makes me feel yucky and I had been feeling grumpy for a few days due to ovulating). And I'm losing my milk, so I think my hormones must be dropping too. It's no longer much of a pleasant thing to nurse my toddler (pain from having no milk), and overall I'm more prone to grumpiness/yelling lately. And I haven't been taking my vitamins, so that doesn't help either.....and on and on and on....

I hate it, and it's rubbing off on the girls (well my oldest doesn't yell much), and even the 2 year old does a lot of yelling. I know that's my fault. :blush

OTOH, even dh has been yelling a lot more too bc the girls are driving him insane with the arguing they do. We are all going in a bad downhill cycle....

[ReedleBeetle]

Ok, jumping in here....and really needing this....

I don't have trouble when we are not home or when people are over. :shrug I just....don't. :scratch I have the worst time when I am home alone with Isaac or DH is sleeping. I am somewhere in the middle when he is here and awake. I think I might need cal/mag, but don't know how to convince DH that I NEED it vs. want it. I definitely think I am struggling some with PMS or PMDD to some degree, but it was worse the first 2 cycles and hasn't been as bad since. I got my menses back in May....lucky me. Still breastfeeding, but not as much. I know I need to get out of the house, but I don't want to. There is nothing to do in our yard, I don't know hardly anyone where we live, and everything there is to do is 30 minutes or more away. I think what I need more than anything is a gentle momma close by....but I would probably smother her after so much time with no one around.

[Marsha]

Growin in Grace, btdt. The only way back is through you. You are the only one you can change, and I don't care how politically correct it is, the tone of the home is set by the mom in most cases. I feel like I led dh down a path of being punitive and yelling, and we are slowly coming back.....but I had to start it.(((hugs)))

nurse reedle, if yoiu don't take care of yourself, you can't give the best of yourself to your family. Does your dh need to okay the cal/mag??
Also if you even suspect it's hormonal, I can tell you that Evening Primrose Oil has worked WONDERS for me. I'm also on an antidepressant which I know is controversial, but I would do ANYTHING not to damage my kids by my yelling and freaking out, which I was doing.I was inconsistent and scary even to myself.

(((hugs))) to all of us. If you knew me, you'd wonder why I was even trying to give advice on this thread LOL, but since I've been there (more than once, I regret to say) I try to help.

[trustingGod2]

I can use the support. I have pinned my yelling down to extreme aggrevation. My 3 yr old is at the stage where he doesn't listen anymore he'll look you straight in the eye and say NO my 15 month is climbing on everything and the oldest fights with my youngets pushing and making him cry. I'm trying so hard to redirect and spend quality time with my oldest with the youngest naps and that seems to help a little. But what happens when the new baby arrives???????I too also here myself and think I would hate to be spoken to like this so I am trying to keep that in mind throughout my day..

[GrowingInGrace]

Growin in Grace, btdt. The only way back is through you. You are the only one you can change, and I don't care how politically correct it is, the tone of the home is set by the mom in most cases. I feel like I led dh down a path of being punitive and yelling, and we are slowly coming back.....but I had to start it.(((hugs)))

nurse reedle, if yoiu don't take care of yourself, you can't give the best of yourself to your family. Does your dh need to okay the cal/mag??
Also if you even suspect it's hormonal, I can tell you that Evening Primrose Oil has worked WONDERS for me. I'm also on an antidepressant which I know is controversial, but I would do ANYTHING not to damage my kids by my yelling and stressing out, which I was doing.I was inconsistent and scary even to myself.

(((hugs))) to all of us. If you knew me, you'd wonder why I was even trying to give advice on this thread LOL, but since I've been there (more than once, I regret to say) I try to help.



Thank you. I agree with you. It doesn't make me feel good to know it, but yes, dh is very much affected by how well I handle things with the girls too. I'm pretty sure he thinks he's fixing it by trying to make the girls behave, but instead, it's just making things worse. But overall the aggravation from the girls was pretty high too. The squabbling amongst the girls, the stubbornness my 2 yo is showing, refusing to eat...

I did take my vitamins last night, and took evening primrose too. And dd1 starts K tomorrow, so for 2.5 hours at least I'll only have 2, so that will certainly help (I hope).

Hopefully things will turn around soon...

[rosesnsnails]

I'm in need of help in this area, also. I think for me it is more about anger management. Any ideas about how to difuse yourself?

[The Tickle Momster]

Jen, finding your triggers and working to eliminate them helps immensely!

Some would recommend Good and Angry. It might be helpful for you. I didn't like parts of it, but some was helpful.

Also, I've found that taking my cal/mag helps a TON!!!!

When you feel yourself getting angry, say out loud "I am getting angry, I am going to take 5 (10) deep breaths and then I will help with this situation". It helps you id that you need to calm down, it helps your kids learn how to deal with rising anger.

[ReedleBeetle]

Does your dh need to okay the cal/mag??


Yeah, money wise, yes.

[TwinMommy03]

Thank you for this thread. I need to work on this too. :bag :yes2

[me]

Ok, jumping in here....and really needing this....

I don't have trouble when we are not home or when people are over. :shrug I just....don't. :scratch
On one of the earlier months of this thread some moms and myself who did that as well started opening curtains or windows. :giggle Not so easy to yell if you dont want to become the mom who can be heard yelling in the block. Also, for me, focusing on the fact that my children are really my Father's children helped. He is always present and sees when I yell at his kids. I dont say that as a guilt trip but to be able to keep in reality that being around people is actually less of an audience than at home. Sometimes I will position myself in front of a mirror as I tell the children something so any big movements or yelling can be seen (BY ME ) :O
I dont know why but things for me are never as intense out of the home as when we are home :shrug But after time if not gotten under control I would catch myself when stressed out in public slipping back into some in the house snarkiness. After a while in house things turn into habit and when out in public one can slip unaware :blush One time my dh put his hand on mine and said "calm down". I was thoroughly imbarrased and havent had "in public slip ups" but at first it was out of imbarrasment. But since working with my triggers here I havent done it out in public because it isnt a habit in the house anylonger. Dont get me wrong. Just when I stopped I slipped in house again with hormones. But thanks to ladies here, I have it under control again.
Thats what we are all here for, to help and be honest. I have found this thread priceless!!!!
I wish we lived close to eachother 'cause I wouldnt mind the company :)

[GrowingInGrace]

Ok, jumping in here....and really needing this....

I don't have trouble when we are not home or when people are over. :shrug I just....don't. :scratch
On one of the earlier months of this thread some moms and myself who did that as well started opening curtains or windows. :giggle Not so easy to yell if you dont want to become the mom who can be heard yelling in the block. Also, for me, focusing on the fact that my children are really my Father's children helped. He is always present and sees when I yell at his kids. I dont say that as a guilt trip but to be able to keep in reality that being around people is actually less of an audience than at home. Sometimes I will position myself in front of a mirror as I tell the children something so any big movements or yelling can be seen (BY ME ) :O
I dont know why but things for me are never as intense out of the home as when we are home :shrug But after time if not gotten under control I would catch myself when stressed out in public slipping back into some in the house snarkiness. After a while in house things turn into habit and when out in public one can slip unaware :blush One time my dh put his hand on mine and said "calm down". I was thoroughly imbarrased and havent had "in public slip ups" but at first it was out of imbarrasment. But since working with my triggers here I havent done it out in public because it isnt a habit in the house anylonger. Dont get me wrong. Just when I stopped I slipped in house again with hormones. But thanks to ladies here, I have it under control again.
Thats what we are all here for, to help and be honest. I have found this thread priceless!!!!
I wish we lived close to eachother 'cause I wouldnt mind the company :)



You know, the mirror idea might be a great idea. I'd bet I'd be more in control if I could see how damaging my expression/nonverbal communication would be.

OTOH, my CHILDREN seem to be better behaved when out than when in the home/in the yard, so I don't feel so stressed, therefore I'm more relaxed.

[ReedleBeetle]

Ok, jumping in here....and really needing this....

I don't have trouble when we are not home or when people are over. :shrug I just....don't. :scratch
On one of the earlier months of this thread some moms and myself who did that as well started opening curtains or windows. :giggle Not so easy to yell if you dont want to become the mom who can be heard yelling in the block. Also, for me, focusing on the fact that my children are really my Father's children helped. He is always present and sees when I yell at his kids. I dont say that as a guilt trip but to be able to keep in reality that being around people is actually less of an audience than at home. Sometimes I will position myself in front of a mirror as I tell the children something so any big movements or yelling can be seen (BY ME ) :O
I dont know why but things for me are never as intense out of the home as when we are home :shrug But after time if not gotten under control I would catch myself when stressed out in public slipping back into some in the house snarkiness. After a while in house things turn into habit and when out in public one can slip unaware :blush One time my dh put his hand on mine and said "calm down". I was thoroughly imbarrased and havent had "in public slip ups" but at first it was out of imbarrasment. But since working with my triggers here I havent done it out in public because it isnt a habit in the house anylonger. Dont get me wrong. Just when I stopped I slipped in house again with hormones. But thanks to ladies here, I have it under control again.
Thats what we are all here for, to help and be honest. I have found this thread priceless!!!!
I wish we lived close to eachother 'cause I wouldnt mind the company :)



You know, the mirror idea might be a great idea. I'd bet I'd be more in control if I could see how damaging my expression/nonverbal communication would be.

OTOH, my CHILDREN seem to be better behaved when out than when in the home/in the yard, so I don't feel so stressed, therefore I'm more relaxed.







I so could use a gentle Momma closer to me. :sigh The mirror thing is a good idea. I will have to grab Isaac and run to the bedroom or the bathroom before I discipline :giggle Actually, THAT is a good idea, because it will also give me time to get calm first ;) I like the opening the windows/curtains....except that means I have to get dressed :lol I probably should do that every day anyway though!

[me]

You mean not everyone stays in the same clothes they sleep in? It does cut down on my laundry though. And I have been known to buy clothing because of their pajama potential, hence my love of yoga pants :O Next thing you know you'll be telling me everyone showers/combs their hair in the morning and brushes their teeth 3x's a day :giggle

[Beauty4Ashes]

I'm really late jumping in on this thread. I need to confess that I blew it big time this evening. Today was going fairly well. We took dh to the airport, went to a small Latin American grocery store, came back and ate, talked to dh, and took a 2-3 mile long walk. Halfway through the walk, I bought a roast beef sandwich with provolone cheese to share with the boys. We went outside to play, and I actually got a fair amount of time to talk with adults. Then it happened. We came back inside around 7:45pm, ds1 went to use the big toilet and ds2 needed water, but he was not satisfied with the cup that I put the water in. It took me a few minutes to get him the water in a cup that he wanted. In the meantime, the toilet overflowed. I lost it, broke the towel rod (bent it) when I hit the wall with my hand, cursed a blue streak, and was overall awful. Come to think of it, I was tired, hungry, upset with myself because I could not be in two places at once and prevent the toilet from overflowing, and I think that I ate too much bread with white flour. Typically if I eat bread, it's with ww flour only. It gets worse, I could not get ds2 to sleep. He was overtired and didn't know what he wanted. I was so incredibly frustrated, I wanted a shower, I needed some downtime because the boys didn't take any nap today. He did go to sleep a little bit after 9. It's weird, I actually do better when dh isn't around because I'm not worrying about trying to keep everything under control lest he get frustrated and try to do the disciplining himself. Today something that I did differently which actually made things worse was that I didn't make the beds first thing this morning; I didn't wash the dishes in the sink immediately the way that I normally do; the boys got bread crumbs all over the rug, but I didn't try to clean it up immediately. I need things in order to be able to function well.

Can someone please tell me how does cal/mag work to calm a person down? And is Evening Primrose safe for in pregnancy? How about St. John's Wort?

[TwinMommy03]

:hug2 I'm sorry I don't have any advice, just wanted to send a hug. :heart
:popcorn about the cal/mag stuff...

[The Tickle Momster]

I don't know how the cal/mag works. I just know that taking some each night before bed helps me sleep deeper, which in turn helps me be a better momma in the morning. You might try a search on gcm for cal/mag. You should get lots of hits.

Tammy, don't be too hard on yourself. We ALL have had bad days. We apologize to our kids, ourselves and our Lord, and move on. Tomorrow is a new day, rejoice in it!

[Beauty4Ashes]

Thanks, Michelle. There are days when I worry about how I will handle another little one when sometimes I can barely handle the two that I have. Bashar seems to be regressing a little more in his speech. Hopefully he will be evaluated (with dh present) in about 3 weeks. Danny is getting to be so so assertive (I don't want to call him bossy or demanding) and sometimes it's hard for me to be patient. When dh is gone, on one hand, I'm more relaxed in some ways--I ordered a Hawaiian style pizza last week when he was gone complete with ham on it without feeling guilty about it. But on the other hand, the drive to the airport is really stressful and I feel worn out when I come home.

[GodisGood]

Ok, my yelling issues stem from the fact that my boys don't listen to me. I am constantly repeating myself even when they're right in front of me. :sigh

For example tonight, "Get dressed" turns into me turning purple and screaming it at them. My 6.5 yr old is totally capable of dressing himself and so is my 4 yr old. I'm there dressing the 2 yr old. 6.5 starts stick his butt out and dancing around. 4 yr old starts to hit him with his cothes. I break it up and tell them to get dressed. 4 yr old starts in again...I intervene. My blood pressue is escalating and I'm talking in an angry voice. They start hitting each other with their pj's. I yell and they look at me like :hunh I feel like crap or screaming. I've starting having them dress at different times or in different locations. Someone always ends up getting yelled at. This is not isolated, this is usually after a day of incidents like this. I usually go to bed feeling like a screaming schrew. I really need help with this. The frustration is so unmanagable. Oh and the few times their has tried to come back he'll say to ds1 for example "____ listen to Mommy" and he'll stop and come back! No yelling not coercing nothing! Gack!

[seekingLove]

Can someone please tell me how does cal/mag work to calm a person down? And is Evening Primrose safe for in pregnancy? How about St. John's Wort?


:popcorn

[GrowingInGrace]

I don't know if I would use EPO during pregnancy. It has been used before as a way to ripen the cervix (I don't know if taking it orally would do it, but somehow getting the oil to the cervix has been used to do that - umm, I guess by inserting the pill there :shrug). It contains prostagladins which are present when the cervix prepares for labor.

It's not been studied on pregnant women, so no, I don't think I would do it.

I would and have taken it while breastfeeding though, it is full of good fatty acids.

You are better off with the cal/mag, getting more sleep, and making sure your blood sugar does not drop (eat small meals frequently). Don't wait till you feel hungry to eat, something always seems to come up when you are pg with 2 toddlers.

[The Tickle Momster]

Ok, my yelling issues stem from the fact that my boys don't listen to me. I am constantly repeating myself even when they're right in front of me. :sigh

For example tonight, "Get dressed" turns into me turning purple and screaming it at them. My 6.5 yr old is totally capable of dressing himself and so is my 4 yr old. I'm there dressing the 2 yr old. 6.5 starts stick his butt out and dancing around. 4 yr old starts to hit him with his cothes. I break it up and tell them to get dressed. 4 yr old starts in again...I intervene. My blood pressue is escalating and I'm talking in an angry voice. They start hitting each other with their pj's. I yell and they look at me like :hunh I feel like cr*p or screaming. I've starting having them dress at different times or in different locations. Someone always ends up getting yelled at. This is not isolated, this is usually after a day of incidents like this. I usually go to bed feeling like a screaming schrew. I really need help with this. The frustration is so unmanagable. Oh and the few times their has tried to come back he'll say to ds1 for example "____ listen to Mommy" and he'll stop and come back! No yelling not coercing nothing! Gack!


Wow! Your house sounds like mine. For the dressing, have you tried 5 stepping? Even though my 6 and 4.5 can completely dress themselves, sometimes (at least 5 times a week) they need me to be involved in the process somehow. I usually end up picking out 4.5's clothes or helping him into part of his clothes. The more involved I am in the process the less yelling I do.

[GodisGood]

Well 6 yr old when left to himself can get dressed, make his bed, brush his teeth and hair, without issues. It's when they're all together or I have two together that we have issues. My hands are usually full of dishes, laundry, toddler, etc.

[me]

I waited until after I had weaned for the St.John's just to be safe :shrug

When I find myself repeating over and over that's usually when I make a point to say it once then get up and help them if they don't start moving. Im more calmer and spend less time by getting up the second time rather than getting worked up and having to get up anyway the billionth time :giggle
And the older they get, the less they want assisting so they eventually start doing it on the 1 st time if they truly believe you will only ask once. Something Im working on with ds right now :yes Its worked with every child I taught and even with my own. 'Cause you know, once a teacher has their own children everything goes out the window or it just plain doesnt work for them :shifty

Eta: Another reason I was having a hard time these couple months was my allergies!!! I had developed allergy enduced asthma and had thought I just had a cough. Staying away from food allergies hadnt been enough these months because of the seasonal allergies being so bad. Now that im on medication, im not tired, cranky, out of breath, and I can stay outside for hours. And I dont need st.johns right now :)