What do you hope your dc will become?

[Forever 4]

We all want the best for our dc. We all have our different reasons for HS'ing our dc. Lately I've run across alot of mammas who hs their dc but do not want them to go to college. They want them to start their own business. So curious what do you want you dc to do/become after HS'ing?

[booboo]

It doesn't bother me if they start their own businesses or not. I pray for them that with their special gifts, that they use them for God's glory. As long as they become godly women, everything else is just the icing on the cake. :yes

[AdrienneQW]

DH wants DS to become an NFL superstar. I want him to be a priest. :laughtears

In all seriousness, DH and I both have graduate degrees so I could see our kids following that path, but I wouldn't mind if they pursued their own businesses or family life instead.

[Teribear]

Well, I DO want my dd to go to college or at least some kind of secondary school (she's into design so it may be an art school rather than a university) after we're done with homeschooling. DH and I both have degrees, he has an advanced degree and I was in a masters program when I put it on hold to become a mom. Its just kind of expected that she will go to college too. If she chooses a different direction I will try to be ok with that. As one of the PP's said, its most important to me that she grows up to be a godly woman.

[SilverMoon]

I pray for them that with their special gifts, that they use them for God's glory. As long as they become godly women, everything else is just the icing on the cake. :yes

Add in men and this is my hope for my kids. Academically, I also want them to go to college or secondary school to have a skill. They aren't self starter types, so starting a business probably won't happen for them. I know that adults change careers several times in their lives, so what they start doing at 18 or 23 probably won't be what they do the rest of their lives.

[illinoismommy]

I hope that my kids either go to college OR start a business :giggle .... basically, do anything that means they are progressing in adulthood and not just sitting around with no job playing video games all day ....

[Teacher Mom]

Whatever God leads them to be. Honest. That is my prayer that I say. I want them to follow their passion and do what they feel led to do.

[klpmommy]

I would like them to go to college. But I don't consider it a requirement. But esp E, I think, should go. Although her current life plans (she is 3.5) are to move to FL & work at Disney World putting toys back on the shelves. :laughtears

Honestly, I can easily see P becoming a politician. He is everyone's friend, charismatic, etc. He would be great at it. He loves people & will definatley have a people-orientated job in the future. Whether he goes to college, starts his own business- who knows?

E will need a job where she doesn't deal with a lot of people. I can see her doing research, being a biologist of some sort where she doesn't have too many people to deal with, etc. I cannot imagine her NOT going to college. She has the mind her Daddy has - very intelligent.

[KitKat]

I don't care. Whatever makes them happy. We are both from working class, no college (except one uncle who is a nurse) families, so for us, it is more about them being happy than anything else.

[abbiroads]

I hope that my dc will have the courage, knowledge and determination to purse the path God has laid out for them.

[Leslie]

I hope mine all become people of integrity doing something useful for the world. But I don't have specific goals for any of them. My first son is obviously college-bound, my second son seems more likely to open his own business. My third son is too young to see any direction. And my daughter - well, it all depends on her strengths and what she wants out of life. Each individual is so unique, I don't see how it's possible to put limits on your child and determine what they can or can't do so early in their journey through life.

[Winkie]

By the time they get to the end of high school, I want them to have some kind of *plan*, involving a good idea of what they feel God's will & leading is for their life. I will encourage them to go to college unless they have a definite desire/calling to pursue an occupation that doesn't require it - say missionary or fireman or something like that. (of course you could do further education for both of those)

[Marsha]

I want mine to go to some sort of secondary education. I don't care if it's a tech school, or a place like University of Phoenix while they work, or traditional college, or community college. But I would love them to want knowledge and education enough to pursue it.

[Mommyo6]

What ever God leads them to be! One of my mantras to my kiddos is "be education minded not necessarily carreer minded". I have seen so many put their empasis on "I am going to be a________." Then they end up unhappy in that field after 4 -6 years of college. Well if your empashis was on the education and the process, not the final outcome you would not feel so bad about working in a different profession, or staying home to nurse babies, or having a degree in biology but becoming a constrution contractor (like my DH did for a whilel). You would not have to feel like you wer wasting your education even if it didn't result in a career. That said I don't really want 4 years of college spent on under water basket weaving either!

Mommyo6

[Ilaria]

I hope that my dc will have the courage, knowledge and determination to purse the path God has laid out for them.


ditto. it really doesn't matter to me what they choose :yes as long as their choices are honoring to God.

:bf1

[BeckaBlue]

I know j does not want them to go to college

I want them to go if they feel they need to for whetever it is they wanna do...and if they got scholarships id encourage it even so
id love for nik to grow up to be a sports player, since his love of playing sports is a such big part of his life...but that doesnt mean it hasta be his 'career' ;)
the girls don't have anything so definite, so :shrug

[birthchic]

Whatever God leads them to be. Honest. That is my prayer that I say. I want them to follow their passion and do what they feel led to do.
This is me, too! If that entails college that is fantastic, if does not that is great, too. What I most desire for my kids is that they grow up to be adults who love learning and who know how to give love and be loved.

[Leslie]

But I would love them to want knowledge and education enough to pursue it.


I want that, too - but I don't think college is necessary to do that. Extensive, purposeful reading can do that, and it can be done by anyone in any job, whether he's a doctor, missionary or store clerk. That was one of Charlotte Mason's most passionate visions - that students would grow into adults who continued learning even after their schooling was done. She has a whole section in one of her books about her vision for "continuation schools" and clubs where working people would read and discuss great books instead of spending their free time playing pool and watching football.

I hope my children will desire careers based on their interests. I see billboards around my town for a particular college with sayings like "I want a raise." or "I want more money." The message is that you should go to college to get a better paying job. I hope my kids don't choose college just to make more money.

[ArmsOfLove]

well I have my Master's and will be starting soon on my Doctorate if all goes well so they have that influence, but I've also watched dh, due in at least part to his personality, in part to his dyslexia that he never really got help for, and in part to his incredibly visual and kinsthetic learning style, struggle every time he's tried to go to school so I have come to believe that "college" isn't for everyone. What I hope for my children is that we will be able to help them determine their God-given talents and giftings and help them choose a path of interest that they can turn into a career. That on that path they will be prepared to accomplish whatever obstacles await them--be it higher learning or apprenticeship dedication. One child wants to be a cowboy--not just the way a child wants to be a firefighter and a cowboy and a police man. He wants to work with horses and cattle and own a ranch someday and I can totally see him being a cowboy. He'll watch rodeo on tv all day and talk about what the riders did right and wrong. And since daddy was a cowboy growing up he's able to offer info. My dd wants to be a dancer. And she is gifted with this ability. I cry when I watch her dance--every time. She has the body, the face, and the talent for it--and I see the gifting from God to do it. Whether she will dance on the stage in Chicago or in mission work is something I don't yet know--but she also has a humanitarian heart that wants to feed the hungry and clothe the naked and house the poor. As she's older we will be partnering her with Habitat for Humanity in our area and eventually I know she will be going on mission trips. Our oldest is becoming a real naturalist and I can see him becoming a zoologist and maybe doing an internship at the zoo when he's older. That needs college and he would be amazing there--able to focus and concentrate and excel at his studies. I am hoping to be working as a professor when they get near that age so that we can get them a free education if they want it--and I'd encourage all of them to get a liberal arts education just for their own benefit, unless God makes it clear they are going in another direction.

As for what the babies will be . . . the world is their doorstep right now and I am loving watching who they become :heart But the more children I've had and the older they become the more I realize that education doesn't make you who you are--it only answers what you know. And I'm more concerned about who they are. What they know has to be something that they take ownership over. And as they determine who they are they will better determine what they need to know to accomplish it. In addition to that I want them to learn all they can, know everything that interests them, just to round them out. I want children who can engage in dialogue, develop relationships across cultural and professional bounds, and speak intelligently with anyone they meet. I want them to be able to fit in at the rodeo here in town and at a social in Scottsdale. I want them to connect to people, not things. I want them to remember and embrace our family motto that life is about relationships and things (even learning) get done along the way.

[Marsha]

But I would love them to want knowledge and education enough to pursue it.


I want that, too - but I don't think college is necessary to do that. Extensive, purposeful reading can do that, and it can be done by anyone in any job, whether he's a doctor, missionary or store clerk. That was one of Charlotte Mason's most passionate visions - that students would grow into adults who continued learning even after their schooling was done. She has a whole section in one of her books about her vision for "continuation schools" and clubs where working people would read and discuss great books instead of spending their free time playing pool and watching football.

I hope my children will desire careers based on their interests. I see billboards around my town for a particular college with sayings like "I want a raise." or "I want more money." The message is that you should go to college to get a better paying job. I hope my kids don't choose college just to make more money.


ita. i never went to college. i am a lifelong reader and studier though. i would like my girls to pursue something beyond high school though, something a bit formal than just reading.

[illinoismommy]

But I would love them to want knowledge and education enough to pursue it.


I want that, too - but I don't think college is necessary to do that. Extensive, purposeful reading can do that, and it can be done by anyone in any job, whether he's a doctor, missionary or store clerk.


Me too.

-- person with no college degree :mrgreen

[apmommy]

I must admit, I want dd to go to college. I have a post graduate degree and I'd like it if dd pursued one too. Even if she doesn't use it while she is a mom, I just want her to have it.

[CelticJourney]

From a homeschooling perspective, I see my job as laying the foundation from which they can become anything God calls them to do. I operate on the assumption that they will go to college and hopefully beyond. We call the baby our little cardiologist, because my father survived a heart attack by a slim margin to be here for him.

[Herbwifemama]

I really want dd to do what makes her feel happy and fulfilled. I don't care if she goes to college or not (if she wants to be a professional chef, then culinary school would be better, kwim? :)). I think she has a gift for music- but her story is unwritten, and I'm delighting in watching it unfold! :)

[Katherine]

I'm reading this with great interest...

If your children aren't interested in pursuing work that demands a college degree, would you want them to go anyway? Why?

Just curious. :)

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As for me... I have no "desires" or attachments to the idea of my children attending college. :shrug I know plenty of successful adults who have no degree and are blindingly smart. ;) I know plenty of people with degrees that are miserable, poor, and scrounging for work, and not too sharp on the up-take. :/ :shifty I've also seen my sister whom I deeply love (who did not mesh well with a college environment right out of high school) grieve and labor for years under the weight of our parents' disappointment, worries, and (well-intentioned) urgings to "finish school" and under her own feelings of inadequacy and failure for not following the expected and educationally "successful" Standard Operating Procedure. She did go back to school as a working adult, where she breezed through with high marks and had a great experience. I'm super proud of her--not b/c she "finished school" like she was "supposed to" :no2 but b/c she set her mind to something SHE had chosen, found a way to make it happen, and accomplished it. :heart :rockon I would have been every bit as proud of her if she'd decided to get married and have babies, or start a worm farm and sell fishing lure--as long it's what SHE chose and it made her happy. :mrgreen

[AdrienneQW]

If your children aren't interested in pursuing work that demands a college degree, would you want them to go anyway? Why?

If they wanted to, yes, if not, nope. :) There are plenty of reasons to pursue higher education besides desiring a career that demands it, so I see no need to cut off the possibility of college even if their chosen path doesn't require it. If they want to go to college, I would encourage them regardless of their career aspirations.

If, however, they did not WANT to go to college, I would feel differently. There are plenty of ways to make one's way in the world without university!

She did go back to school as a working adult, where she breezed through with high marks and had a great experience.

Good for your sister! :tu I struggled in undergrad - well, compared to high school anyway. I got decent grades, but it was not particularly a good experience. I took six years off after my bachelor's, got my foot in the door in my chosen field, then went back for my master's. Even though the coursework was exponentially more difficult and I was working full-time, I still breezed through and graduated with a 4.0 GPA (woohoo, go me! LOL) It was an entirely different experience, even though my major did not change. I'm a big fan of getting some life experience before tackling college if one is so led. ;)

[mybodymyself]

:popcorn

Well, I haven't been to college because of my disability and my schooling isn't what you expect with it. In the end didn't go to college and I'm still on the fence if I still want to go.

Thank you.

[BeckaBlue]

I'm reading this with great interest...

If your children aren't interested in pursuing work that demands a college degree, would you want them to go anyway? Why?

Just curious. :)

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I honestly would only want them to if it could be done with minimal loans (through grants, scholarships, etc..., but not student loans) that is the only reason i would *not* want them to go. i would not want them to be getting started off the bat with such a debt. and i somewhat feel the same way about if what they want to do is based on have a degree and will work with them towards avoiding that no matter what the reason for them going.
did that make sense? :giggle

[illinoismommy]

I know plenty of successful adults who have no degree and are blindingly smart. ;)

why thank you .................... jk :laughtears


About the rest-- that's exactly it. I wish someone would have told us that college debt is NOT NOT NOT worth it. :banghead I am soooooooo frustrated with college debt. If we had it to do over again we would have my husband either not go to college or just get a two year degree. Currently he's working at a job he could get with no degree.

If he hadn't gone to college we wouldn't have college debt, and the additional 4 years of him working may have meant that he would be at the next level up in his company. Both of those possibilities would make all the difference in our stress level since we are barely above low income right now and trying to raise a family.

So you can bet I'm going to do more talking to my kids about going to college if you know what you want to do there (my husband spent 3 years in one major then 4 years in another :banghead ) and about doing it in a frugal way. I don't see any reason to encourage them to go if they don't plan to use it. On the other hand, maybe by the time my kids get to college it will be the new high school. :shrug Then it will be frugality all the way.

[3PeasInAPod]

I hope that my dc will have the courage, knowledge and determination to purse the path God has laid out for them.


This is my prayer too... it doesn't matter "what" they do, as long as Christ is their satisfaction & they are on His path.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in titles...like "my son is a doctor, or my daughter is a biologist...etc... like somehow that makes them more important...

[Katherine]

I see no need to cut off the possibility of college even if their chosen path doesn't require it.

I'm not talking about cutting anything off or denying them that choice. :no

I'm more thinking of people who push their kids to college just b/c you're "supposed" to go to college, or b/c you'll get a better job, or b/c it's an experience everyone should have, etc. The kids just sort of pick a major out of the hat (and often change it 2 or 3 times along the way--setting back their finish date and accruing more debt) and often graduate without being vested in any constructive and realistic goals about where to go next. Or they flounder around for a few years, realize they don't like the profession that's attached to their major, and go a completely different direction which frequently requires more/different schooling.

There are plenty of ways to make one's way in the world without university!

I agree.

I honestly would only want them to if it could be done with minimal loans (through grants, scholarships, etc..., but not student loans) that is the only reason i would *not* want them to go

I *think* what you're saying is that the issue of debt is the only reason you would want them to postpone a college education, and that if they could do it without debt, you would want them to go. ???

I think people get more out of university educations when they invested in a personal and mature way in whatever it is they're studying. Some kids definitely ARE at 18, but I would venture to say that many would benefit from a few years in the workforce or apprenticing in a field of interest before they plunged into college. It's not *just* about financial debt, IMO. It's years of your life and effort spent on something.

Back to the example of my sis. Her first 2 years of college were free b/c she attended a university where my Dad was teaching..... She didn't accumulate debt, but those 2 years didn't further any of her personal goals or put her in a position for a career she loved either. When she went back to school as an adult, she had to work a job and get financial help from others, and her heart was behind what she was doing. She chose a major thoughtfully and with consideration for what she knew about herself as an adult woman... she valued the time and money necessary to make her education possible. She chose extracurricular activities that contributed to her goals. She was pursuing formal education in a mature, responsible, purposeful way.

If my kids go to college I want it to be b/c it's part of the journey to reach their personal goals and not just something that they're doing out of social obligation or to please other people.

As for what I want them to become... :think I guess this is similar to what Crystal was saying....

I don't think that a person's activities defines who they are, so I honestly don't worry or speculate too much about my kids' career paths. I think they who they are on the inside and the type of relationships they cultivate with others will define the quality and guide the course of their lives no matter what circumstances surround them. So my *hopes* revolve more around who they will be than what they will do.

[BeckaBlue]

I honestly would only want them to if it could be done with minimal loans (through grants, scholarships, etc..., but not student loans) that is the only reason i would *not* want them to go

I *think* what you're saying is that the issue of debt is the only reason you would want them to postpone a college education, and that if they could do it without debt, you would want them to go. ???



I only want them to go if they have their heart set on doing something that requires a higher education....there is little way out of student debts and i would not want them to accumulate that debt just because. if they feel led to go to college regardless of what they want to do (if they even know yet) than i'm not gonna discourage it, but i will encourage finding ways other than multiple student loans to do it. if what they have their heart set on doing requires that degree than they need to do what possible to reduce what their debt's would be. i don't want them to go if they do not have a focus *and* they hafta use student loans to do it. did that make a bit more sense?
hopefully when it's an issue i will have a fund for each of them to use towards college or just to get started off, but im currently not in a position to do that so we can't count on it :shrug

[stbmomof1plus2]

We really don't have a "hope" that our dc go to college. If that is their choice we are okay with that. I mean, education is important to us - dh and I both have 3 degrees a piece and I hold a PhD - so we definitely see a value in college. But what we want most for our kids is that have true choices in life and make decisions based on things they have a desire to explore and not just to make a certain amount of money.
We also want to encourage our kids to not limit themselves to just "one" area. We want them to know that don't have to pick just one thing and "be" only that. They can explore a number of different areas and not pigeon hole themselves into just one career. That is why homeschooling is such a good thing for kids. They can actively and deeply explore the sciences, the arts, business, history, literature, etc. They truly get the whole world opened to them.
We don't want to talk in terms of what they want to "be". Dh and I joke a lot and say they will do X in the "off season" (his hopes of an NFL player, I have said ds can be a kicker because I don't want him to get hurt :P~)
If they want to go to college, we are all for that. But, I don't want them to think they "have" to go to college in order to have success in life. It helps if that is one of the career paths you want to take, but its not the only way. Also, if they don't know what they are going to college for it can be a waste of time and a lot of money.
We will put them in college classes before college age though - if they are academically bent. Especially if college classes are still free to high schoolers in our state when they get that age.

[Heather Micaela]

I hope that my children discover, refine, and learn a lot about thier passion and that they are able to tie it into their adult life.

I cant actually be more speicif than that :shrug

[LittleSweetPeas]

Our focus is college. We have an expectation that all of our kids will work toward that. Both DH and I feel strongly that you need a college degree in today's world. Just *our* opinion.

If they chose something different I wouldn't feel disappointed but I would want to know what their plan was and how they were going to get there. I would probably highlight for them how college could be beneficial for that plan but I'm not going to force them to go neither will I pay for kids who don't want to be there.

And I just pray that God will put a calling on their hearts and they will know the direction they need to head in. But I think most of those directions can (and probably should) involve college. :smile

My hopes are my kid's hope so right now they would be for DD to become an astronaut and a firefighter. We'll see what grabs DD2's interest. :)

[Piper2]

I want ds to do whatever he wants and needs to do to pursue the life God leads him into. He's gone from wanting to be a bus driver (same thing DH wanted to be when he was a kid ;)), to a preacher (because he thought following God's will meant you had to be a preacher), to an astronaut. He says he wants to go to college, but he doesn't think he wants to go away to college...by the time he's old enough, Internet courses will probably be more commonplace than they are now.

I suspect he will probably wind up going into some sort of computer graphics or animation.

[SueQ]

I want my children to became whoever God created them to be. My goal in Homeschooling them is to introduce them to their Creator and encourage them to enter in a relationship with Him. The rest is truly up to God. My goal in teaching them at home is for them to see their Creator in all of creation, to see that God made them who they are, to help them find the gifts and talents God created them with, and for them to use those gifts and talents to serve their Creator. :heart

Maybe they will be led by God to go to college, then it would be my desire for them to go. Maybe they'll be led by God to go to a trade school, then my desire would be for them to go. Maybe they will be led by God to seek an apprenticeship, then my desire for them is to do that. My desire for them is to know God, have a relationship with Him, and follow *His* leading in thier lives. If they do that, they can not go wrong in life. ;) :yes

[Iarwain]

If my kids go to college I want it to be b/c it's part of the journey to reach their personal goals and not just something that they're doing out of social obligation or to please other people.

:yes I think of college as a means to an end. It is also an *adult* decision, therefore it is not mine to make, promote, push, whatever. I see my goal as preparing them to best be able to follow whatever their path may be. That may mean some of their education and training taking place before they are even college age. For example, Princess has her heart set on being a doula and eventually a midwife. If she still feels that way when she's in her mid teens I'll help her get started with training then and help her explore educational options, not all of which involve college. For now she already goes with me to birth-related meetings and reads books on the subject. If this turns out to be her life's passion she will be well on her way before college is even a part of the picture and may well choose a different path to getting the education she needs.

What I want for them is to first of all be smack dab in the center of God's will for them. I want for them to pursue their passions. I want their life's work to be something that gives them joy and fulfillment. I'd be immensely proud if one of my children became a doctor or an engineer or a world-famous scientist. I'd also be immensely proud, maybe even more so, if one of them spent their life dirt-poor on the mission field.

[Leslie]

It is also an *adult* decision, therefore it is not mine to make, promote, push, whatever. I see my goal as preparing them to best be able to follow whatever their path may be.


I agree. That's why I don't think it's right to deliberately close off doors to college for a child. I know of one homeschooler whose parents were of a mindset that girls should be trained to be wives and nothing else. Therefore, they skimped on her math - after all, what does a housewife need beyond knowing how to measure ingredients for recipes? She did end up going to college, and has had to struggle to catch up to college level math as a result.