how to HS the social child?

[Novella]

This has me baffled--

Now, I really am committed to providing Joshua's education. But, I am stuck on meeting his needs as an extrovert. Anyone who has spent time out with my son knows just how social he is. He walked up to strangers at the park yesterday to tell them about the fish eating his bread! LOL! Then, he asked a police officer for his wallet-- at least he didn't try to steal it ;) :lol: And, he's only 2!!!

I know there are HSing co-ops and meetings and such- but watching Joshua at this point has me baffled as to how it will all pan out. He seems to have a NEED to be out everyday (like his mommy ;) ) I just don't know how to serve this need through homeschooling.

Any thoughts would be great!

thanks,
Cindy :)

[Sweet Life]

:popcorn

[cobluegirl]

I think you can homeschool and just set up a play date once or twice a week...there are a lot of homeschool groups out there that get together and do stuff so their kids have other social activity.

[Mamatoto]

I would watch and see what direction it goes in, too...there are many extroverted two year olds who become introverted seven year olds. :) Socialization happens everywhere...as your son is showing you.

[Novella]

I would watch and see what direction it goes in, too...there are many extroverted two year olds who become introverted seven year olds. :) Socialization happens everywhere...as your son is showing you.


Absolutely! I agree 100%! We "socialize" alot-- with the salesman at the store, cashier at the market, the passer-by at the park, my neighbor... I could go on. My son is, right now, the epitome of EXTROVERTISM (ok, so I made that word up :giggle ) He thrives off of being around others-- and quite frankly, I think I bore him :rolleyes

I know I need to follow his lead. I am just concerned that his lead is into the formal school setting. All in all, that isn't "terrible" (as I am a former teacher), but I would prefer he learn lessons at home than in a classroom confined to a desk.

Thank you ladies for your input!! :D

[Quiteria]

My dd is like this. Days where we stay home are more difficult than when we go out. When she was younger, we used to run an errand almost every day instead of grouping them once a week. Right now, she is in public kindergarten, and she has loved the socialization and is learning well, but I have my reservations about some of the conflicts with teacher and other students...like she doesn't seem to feel safe telling the teacher if there are problems (whether with other kids or with learning or anything that needs to be clarified), and there are bullies. So, seriously wondering what's best for next year, and glad to follow your thread for ideas.

[Embracing Grace]

We're wondering the same thing about our ds. He is sooooo out-going! We're just planning on having a lot of play-dates, maybe join a group of some sort. Right now he spends time in toddler Sunday school, and with another friend on play dates. He always approaches people at the store, etc. to tell them about whatever is going on in his little head. A little embarassing for his introverted mommy, but what can you do.

[Singingmom]

Thinking about your ds's sweet, outgoing personality in a public school setting reminded me of several students I taught in ps Kindy. Ironically, there is a lot of time in school, even K, where the children are required to be quiet and listen or work or rest. The ones who wanted to talk a lot had to be politely shushed a lot so we could get on with "school." It may actually turn out that you can provide more social hours during the day for your child than public school can!

[Katherine]

I'm not "officially" a homeschooling mom yet, but this has been one of my big concerns, so I thought I'd share...

My son is like yours... he wants to be interacting with another human being *at all times* and especially with new/different people. He constantly talks--even to people who are ignoring him :shifty--and wants to pretend and play act and... just.. Whew! He is SO social. :lol It doesn't help that Mom and his nearest-age sibling are introverts. :O

I am not going to to try to meet his social needs *through* homeschooling. :no
and the truth is that the classroom part of a school setting wouldn't meet his social needs either. ;)

I really believe that if I sent him somewhere, he would *try* to get his social needs met at recess, through special activities at school, and by talking/socializing in class when he was supposed to be quiet and listening. :shifty and I honestly don't believe it would be enough... I think he's still be craving interaction when he came home.

So, when I think of it in that way, I can come up with a list of homeschooling compatible things to meet his social needs:

--classes/activities from community resources (he's doing swimming and clay class)
--playground time; visits with other hs'ing families
--trips to the store with Mom where he talks the ears off the cashier and strikes up conversation with every person he sees. :giggle
--attending a church with lots of emphasis on family activities and children's programs. He loves his classes there, and stuff like VBS... and he's going to start kid's choir soon.

his "classes" are really activities so he's doing gross and fine motor skills the whole time--not just sitting still and listening. Church itself has elements of "sit and listen" but it's interwoven with activites and interaction, and it's not 5 days a week for hours on end, ya know?

I also wanted to say that sometimes he *needs* to have some alone time even if he doesn't feel like he wants it. So, teaching *how* to be alone for brief periods of time is something I'm working on here. While I respect the bent of his personality, I also realize how important it's going to be in life for HIM to respect the space and privacy of others, and that's going to mean being comfortable in his own skin and learning how to occupy himself without constant feedback from the people around him. (and if anyone has any suggestions for teaching this, I'm all ears) :lol Right now I occasionally just have him stay in his room and listen to an audio book while playing blocks, or take a bath by himself, etc.

[LittleSweetPeas]

How about an extroverted mother? :giggle

Seriously though, our plan is to be involved in the following:

HS groups locally--meetings and field trips
HS PE classes through the YMCA
her dance class
CBS bible study on Weds
Awana
Library storytimes

I have also considered some of the 4H clubs (even though we're urban, they have them!) and other educational type classes provided by organizations. I'll have to keep thinking...there were more things I had put on my brainstorming list around here somewhere.

[jenny_islander]

I am studying Charlotte Mason's method for use with my little social butterfly, age 3. I discovered that a quote I found years ago and took to heart is actually from one of her books. She pointed out that most adults do not spend their lives in a group of people all their own age working on the same task. Socialization should prepare a child to enter society: to interact with people of all ages, backgrounds, and occupations. She (or a commentator--I don't have my notes handy) pointed out the absurdity of expecting a roomful of small children to teach these skills to one another.

My daughter goes to church (and, soon, Sunday school) on Sunday, shops with the whole family on Monday, goes to a public play group on Tuesday, plays at a park or McDonald's on Wednesdays and Fridays, attends story time at the library on Thursday, and goes garage saling with Baby and me on Saturday. She is interacting constantly with older and younger children and grown-ups and one of her relatives is always nearby to correct any social faux pas she might make. (Her Sunday School teacher is also her adored cousin.) Social time rarely lasts more than an hour or two, however, so that she doesn't get overloaded and cranky. I think that she is better served than she would be in a preschool program.

Just my two cents.

[Novella]

Thanks again everyone for your insight! It is really helpful :yes We definitely get out and interact with the world everyday and that, to me, is a better life lesson than confining to a small classroom of toddlers or later on, kids his own age.

[illinoismommy]

on another thread someone (mamatoto?) recommended Hold On To Your Kids .... now I haven't read this yet but from the stuff on amazon it talks about how in our culture we try too hard to get our kids to become peer dependent.... thats not to say you shouldn't get out every day, but perhaps you could worry less about it being a peer experience. I am looking forward to reading the book so that I actually know what I am talking about :giggle but it made sense to me already!

[Katherine]

you could worry less about it being a peer experience

:yes That part makes perfect sense to me, Janet. :yes

(And you look FANTASTIC!!! only 9 weeks post partum... :jawdrop :) :heart )

[ArmsOfLove]

As an extreme extrovert with more than one for children I've come to truly value the need to teach extroverts how to be alone. Yes, we get recharged by being around other people, but we need to know how to exist in isolation as well. We do lots of "get out and about" activities, the children are in classes, we're part of a coop, but there are just times when you need to figure out how to play/be by yourself :)

Plus, it's easier for the extreme extrovert to concentrate and get their work done if there is no one there to distract and chat with them ;)

[LittleSweetPeas]

Something else that I've been mulling around a lot is changing my mindset from a peer-dependent mindset to a family-dependent mindset. For us its a family value/goal for my kids to enjoy one another and to learn how to play together with each other and find some of those social needs met through their siblings. This is all new to me as once I reached the pre-teen years my parents never encouraged me in this so I'm trying to find my way here. :) Not to say my kids wont have outside friends but really learning to be friends first in our family and then to look outside of our family.

This is a facet that HS provides that really attracts me. :heart Not that it cant be done when kids are in PS, I just think there are more opportunities to facilitate this when kids are home together all day.