Church Run Parenting Courses

[eaving]

Hi Everyone, i need some advice.

The church i attend is great, but unfortunately the only parenting courses offered are Growing Kids Gods Way (Ezzo).
And our Supper Nights for Mothers are run by the same people, and talks are generally down this line of thinking, to promote the courses, etc.

So, it is frustrating for me, but i'm not the only one who is into AP parenting in my church, so i don't intend to change churches because of it. Maybe i could make a positive contribution...

What i'm thinking is i'd like to see an alternative course offerred (but without causing division).
What parenting courses are out there for Gentle Minded Christians? I'm in Australia...

Any advice would be appreciated from those in similar situations. I don't know whether to go to these supper nights or not as i don't want to support the ministry of GKGW.

[MarynMunchkins]

I wrote a letter to my pastor outlining my concerns with GKGW and asked him to pull the class. Granted, it wasn't an ongoing class, but he did pull it. :tu It's in the Resources sticky, and you're welcome to it if you want it.

Other than that, I express concerns about parenting courses to the leadership, and don't go if I can't support it. :shrug I'm debating offering to teach a more gentle course at our church, but life circumstances don't currently allow for that. ;)

[katiekind]

If you have a large church it probably would be possible to have an alternative class. On the Ezzo.info site there's a list of possible alternative classes -- at least gives you some ideas to look into: http://www.ezzo.info/alternatives.htm

Welcome to GCM!

[HomeWithMyBabies]

I found a video series course by Tim Kimmel. I didn't get to participate, because my pastor chose to go with a Dobson series, so I can't provide details about it.

I heard Dr. Sears has come out with one, too.

Sorry I don't have any links right now!

[CelticJourney]

I heard Dr. Sears has come out with one, too

I taught the Sears class - it is really better suited for expectant parents than those currently parenting. I second the idea of going to Ezzo.info and checking their list. I also was successful in getting Ezzo removed from my church. If that is a project you want to consider, let us know and we can share how we approached it.

[eaving]

I know one Elder in my church is interested in getting a group together to evaluate what other courses are out there - so those links are great - i'll be trying to find out more about each of them, then maybe i could propose some alternatives more officially...

i would love to have ezzo courses removed from the church. i'm interested in how you went about doing that, i'm only new here and haven't spent much time looking around the forum here for information, maybe there are threads about this?

ezzo in my church is pretty entrenched, its been around for years and years, and all the courses are offered 4 times a year from babies to teenagers, with plenty of families involved. i'm from a big church, theres many families here.
i'm trying to keep it out of the playgroup, but there is some of the books and dvd in the playgroup library...i want to get some Sears in there...

i think my church leadership is not pro-ezzo, but its come about because there are parents commited to run it, and some key families involved in it.
If there was an alternative offered, i don't think it would be hugely opposed, so long as it was a good course.
Dunno how a church ban would work. I'd love to see it disappear/die out because people start thinking for themselves and choose to investigate alternatives.

I need to get some confidence, the families involved with these courses are more experienced parents than me, and have big families,
i'm a young mum with two toddlers, i feel inexperienced, but i know these aren't right.
i don't want to be setting myself up as knowing it all, you know??

I need to think about how to go about this.
I've decided against going to the women's supper night, as i don't want to be assumed that i support the courses and don't want my money going towards them.

[katiekind]

Your avatar is gorgeous.

Totally off topic, I know. Sorry! :mrgreen

God be with you. I think it's wonderful they may be open to sponsering an alternative.

[CelticJourney]

What I did was to present my concerns as dispassionately as possible. I organized articles into three categories: medical, scriptural and character. I did my best to get 'confirmable' date - things with names and addresses that someone could pick up the phone and call. For example, the letters from the churches where Ezzo was removed have a phone number, etc. This disarms the 'you can read anything on the net' defense.

Ezzo.info has a 22 page bibliography of articles of concern - that should get someone's attention. I started with a summary of what I included (there are three sections to this packet.......), the bib and then the sections. Include the statement by Focus on the Family - that seems to get attention.

You can briefly meet with them or just give them the materials - whatever you feel comfortable doing. One thing I chose to do, or not to do in this case, was to not recommend another program as part of the packet. You can mention that you know of many other programs if they are looking, but in my case, because I had taught the Sears material and I didn't want it to look like a terf war.

[something glorious]

so, elizabeth....do you have hard or digital copies of all of the materials you presented to your church? i would :heart to be able to piggyback off of you :O

[CelticJourney]

I have hard copies - my 'Ezzo notebook' :shifty

[something glorious]

so, if we were willing to pay for photocopies and shipping.....? :shifty

[CelticJourney]

...sorry, forgot to finish answering :O Yes, I can copy it and send it to you, as long as you don't need it asap. PM me your address.

Edited: Correction - the bibliography is 12 pages, not 22.

I'll include my quotes pages as well if you want.

[hsgbdmama]

My church did Dr. Kevin Leman's Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours video series and it was :tu.

[diamondintherough]

pm'd you Elizabeth.

[Rabbit]

I found a video series course by Tim Kimmel. I didn't get to participate, because my pastor chose to go with a Dobson series, so I can't provide details about it.

I heard Dr. Sears has come out with one, too.

Sorry I don't have any links right now!


I have his video series, and 14 participant workbooks. I was supposed to teach it once, but all the plans fell through, so it's sitting on my shelf, waiting. It's good, but very general. You can drop any parent or grandparent into the study, from engaged teen who might have a baby in a few years, to grandmother with a college aged grandchild. It gets your head and heart pointed in the right direction, but needs to be followed with very practical solutions for specific ageas.

[HomeWithMyBabies]

It gets your head and heart pointed in the right direction, but needs to be followed with very practical solutions for specific ageas.

That's how I felt about the book, Grace Based Parenting, too. :yes I loved it but it really only got me thinking; I had to get tools elsewhere.

My church did Dr. Kevin Leman's Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours video series and it was :tu.

I really appreciated the Lehman course we did at our church. I had forgotten that one!

[CelticJourney]

Leham spoke at our church two or three years ago and I really enjoyed him.

[eaving]

does the Lehan series have more age-practical tips??

[Rabbit]

I'm just adding more of my thoughts on Kimmel.

I like Kimmel for groups that aren't used to hearing about grace. That way they're focusing on what is behind the age specific tips, before they get into "weird" parenting practices. Otherwise, if you start talking about co-sleeping or not spanking, you get defensive angry folk who then can't hear anything about grace.

For people who get grace already, Kimmel helps sharpen their grasp of the big picture, and focus on the end goals of raising a child. Grace Based Parenting was great, but Raising Kids for True Greatness was /really/ awesome and thought-provoking.

[hsgbdmama]

does the Lehan series have more age-practical tips??


Yes, he does have sections on various age groups, including teens. :tu

[eaving]

that sounds good, as its the foundation of what the parenting principles are which is most important, and is so different to others.

[jenn3514]

Nak, wanted to come back for titles