I hope this mommy was just having a bad night......

[hey mommy]

I went to Walmart tonight and there was a woman w/a young girl, probably about 4-5, maybe 6 at the most... The little girl was asking for something and the mom said 'no! Now MOVE!".. The little girl asked again and the mom said "JUST SHUT-UP!". I felt so bad for the little girl.........


I hope the mom was just having a bad night........

[Amythestmama]

Was it the same mommy I saw at the grocery store the other day?or her twin? :shifty She had 4 kids with the youngest about 6 and the oldest about 12. Everything those kids did she screamed at them. I think that if everyone in the store hadn't been looking on in amazement, she would have been hitting them. The oldest one knew how to stay out of the way, and the next one just went back out to the car, but the other 2 - about 6&8 were asking if they could get this or that and she was screaming NO! #^&@%#&^ QUIT BOTHERING ME! The little boy was trying to help sack the groceries and she told him he wasn't doing it right- what 6 yr old can 'perfectly' sack groceries- and told him to stop. He said he wanted to help and she told him to get out of the way. He didn't move fast enough and she shoved him. Then when they were leaving she pushed him again. :hissyfit I was in the next checkout lane and was so astonished. DD was staring and looking very scared. While we were sacking our things, she was right next to us yelling at the kids and I asked if she was having a bad day, hoping that she would use that as an opportunity to get herself together, and she told me to mind my own business. :shrug The cashier looked sympathetic and when they hd gone out the door, told me I was braver than she would have been. But the thing is, the older kids acted like it was Normal for her to be that way and were even treating the younger kids roughly and saying how stupid they were. :td It is things like that that really bug me b/c I wish I could do something.

[gentlemommy]

.

[Beauty4Ashes]

:cry It makes me appreciate the mom I saw in Marshall's the other day. Her little boy looks like he's about the same age as ds1. He was pushing a little suitcase on wheels near by where she was shopping. I smiled at her and said, my son loves to do that! She said, it's hard, he doesn't want to stay with me in the cart or hold my hand. This way I know where he is. I said, you know what worked for me? I had my son hold one side of my hand basket and I held the other one. He felt like a big boy, and it kept him next to me. It was a very pleasant exchange...but I did see a woman in the Walmart parking lot who kept telling her ds (maybe 3) to stop whining, over and over again.

[CelticJourney]

Tammy, what a great opportunity you took to affirm that mom :highfive

Christmas brings so much stress, especially to moms since in most cases we do the work.

[Teacher Mom]

In situations where the mom is LOSING it, I always say loud enough for them to hear, but to my children, "see I am not the only one who disciplines their kids. To which, my children say, Mom, you never yell at us like that!" I don't know, maybe passive/aggressive? :shrug

I do not want to get into a big altercation with someone (they would have to PROVE themselves in front of their kids and then would take it out on them later anyway), but perhaps she will think about how she is talking to her kids? I know, probably NOT!

I pray that more and more parents will discover GENTLE DISCIPLINE and be role models for other parents.

[Strumbelina]

I know I have had exchanges like that with my dc :blush. I have never told them to 'shut up' but I have told them to 'be quiet PLEASE', and I have found myself nagging them or saying their names over and over with an agitated quality to my voice. I am sure people have looked at me and wondered why I even bother taking them out at all. Granted, this doesn't happen that often, but it does happen, and it certainly wouln't make for a good first impression.
I remember being at the grocery and my ds was in the bottom of the cart screaming and wailing. Honestly, I can't remember why, he was probably three or less and dd was in the sling, and I just had to finish and get out of there, I couldn't make him stop or seem to help him. Some older lady gave me a look and commented on the fact that my son was not very happy. I was like.....'uh yeah, I can see that.... :rolleyes" I was SO stressed out during that grocery visit, and I didn't have GBD tools then either. I remember feeling judged, and I remember feeling like that wasn't helpful to me.

[Sarai]

but I did see a woman in the Walmart parking lot who kept telling her ds (maybe 3) to stop whining, over and over again.


Ummm...you might have seen me. :shifty 3 *is* the Age of Whine, you know. ;) And yes, there are much better ways to handle whining than saying repeatedly "Stop whining!", but, well......GBD mommies mess up too. And get weary. And silently beg God in their very worn-out moments "PLEASE, PLEASE let him stop whining for 5 minutes..". :blush

[CelticJourney]

I always say loud enough for them to hear, but to my children, "see I am not the only one who disciplines their kids. To which, my children say, Mom, you never yell at us like that!" I don't know, maybe passive/aggressive?

I truely do understand what your goal was, but I would give second thought to involving my children in an effort to publically shame someone.

[hey mommy]

I tell DS "wow, sounds like someone is having a bad day, huh?"

But DS wasn't w/me last night. He was home in bed. Not asleep, but at least in bed. lol..

It was about 9 at night, the place was packed and the lines were horrible. I'm sure she could have just been having a bad night... I've been known to tell my DS to move and 'just shush! Okay. Just hush!" in a not so nice way sometimes when I'm stressed, which has been a lot in the past few weeks... It'll be sooo nice when the holidays are over...

[Teacher Mom]

I always say loud enough for them to hear, but to my children, "see I am not the only one who disciplines their kids. To which, my children say, Mom, you never yell at us like that!" I don't know, maybe passive/aggressive?

I truely do understand what your goal was, but I would give second thought to involving my children in an effort to publically shame someone.


I don't think I am publicly shaming anyone. Instead of asking if they are having a bad day and having them tell me to mind my own business, I just try to let people know they are not alone in their quest to get their children to listen to them.

[Beauty4Ashes]

but I did see a woman in the Walmart parking lot who kept telling her ds (maybe 3) to stop whining, over and over again.


Ummm...you might have seen me. :shifty 3 *is* the Age of Whine, you know. ;) And yes, there are much better ways to handle whining than saying repeatedly "Stop whining!", but, well......GBD mommies mess up too. And get weary. And silently beg God in their very worn-out moments "PLEASE, PLEASE let him stop whining for 5 minutes..". :blush


:hug I don't yet have a 3 year old, so I will look forward with anticipation to the days of having cheese with my whine :hug Though today I was the not so gbd mommy. It's dh's birthday and I was frantically trying to get the cooking done. I bought his gifts last night. I found myself yelling at them for no reason :td My begging God moments are usually at bedtime, please dear God, just let them sleep!!!

[CelticJourney]

I always say loud enough for them to hear, but to my children, "see I am not the only one who disciplines their kids. To which, my children say, Mom, you never yell at us like that!" I don't know, maybe passive/aggressive?
I don't think I am publicly shaming anyone. Instead of asking if they are having a bad day and having them tell me to mind my own business,
Ok, maybe it's how I'm reading it.
I always say loud enough for them to hear, but to my children, "see I am not the only one who disciplines their kids.
This doesn't say 'you're having a bad day' to me, it says 'you are doing a good job disciplining your child/I approve of your actions.'
Mom, you never yell at us like that!"
This part is the message you are seeking to send, the part that you are concerned is passive-agressive. It reads to me "yeah mom, you're bad, but you're not THAT bad."