SOOOOO frustrated!!!!!

[catholicapmom]

I don't have the patience for this. I thought I would, but I don't. :blush

Ds is NOT cooperating and it's making me :banghead and :hissyfit and :cry . :hiding Seriously, he took AN HOUR to write one word today!!! It wasn't supercalofragilisticexpialodious, it was "an"!!! :neutral

Between that and dd2 getting into everything today I'm ready to run away. LOL Or send him to school...

Any advice for coping and not losing it??? :sad2

[AprilBr]

Ok don't freak out! I am not sure about boys because we just have girls but I have read it takes them a while in the small motor department. Did he take so long because he just didn't want to do it or can't do it? Maybe you can use a magna-doodle. My first hated writing on paper but loved the magnadoodle. Especially at that age I would give incentives like playing outside when he is done, etc.

[catholicapmom]

He took so long because he was whining that he didn't want to do it. He *can* do it, he just doesn't like to. I gave him a break w/ a snack and "recess" outside, but it didn't help. He's great in the other subjects (Religion, geography, etc) but he doesn't like to write. :giggle

[pneumaphile]

I totally had to make Jody go jump on the trampoline today while we were working - I was a bit frustrated that he couldn't sit still for 10 minutes while we talked about what he had been reading! I did it in desparation, but it actually worked out great - I think jumping on the tramp freed up a part of his mind so he could answer my questions about his reading - he did so much better!

As far as when he gets "stuck" I also do this - he got "stuck" in math today - it was like he was staring at the math problem but couldn't make his brain work, so I made him get up and do some calesthenics with me, then go back to his math, and it was like we flipped a switch, he breezed through the rest of it.

And if something just not working out that day, I really just put it aside and try again tomorrow. It try really hard to be flexible like that - it's one of the reasons I'm homeschooling.

Jody still has a hard time writing. What works best for us is to give him workbooks with fun stuff to write, like crossword puzzles, and also he has a journal where I have him draw a picture (he's really enthusiastic about drawing) and then "caption" the picture with one or two sentences explaining what's happening. Or I have him draw comic books, because you have to write words for those, too. Anything that gives him writing practice. We were learning about similes last week and I asked him to simply think of something he loves, draw a picture of it, and write a simile about it. He wrote "Star Wars is cool like Transformers. Transformers are cool like Star Wars" LOL! But he's figuring out that similes compare two things using "like" or "as," who am I to say he can't compare Star Wars to Transformers LOL! So anyway, I can totally see Jody balking like that over writing, so I just have to get creative, rather than sticking like glue to the curriculum and getting nowhere.

:hug I know it can be frustrating! I've been there!

[Mama Calidad]

My DD isn't big on the writing element of learning yet, either. What works for us is for her to learn the lessons and me to do the writing. It's not essential to math or phonics that she write the numbers/letters. There are days where she'll pick up the pencil and do the writing herself and that's fantastic.

I slip in some handwriting on the sly...writing little cards to grandparents, artwork, etc. She's not the most coordinated kid on the planet (she inherited that from her dear mother). I think that's a big part of why handwriting is frustrating to her.

[jghomeschooler]

what *program* are you using for handwriting?
We are using Handwriting Without Tears, it has manipulatives that are great.

I wouldn't push the handwriting, in fact, I am NOT pushing it with ds, even though he has to *work* on handwriting for 10 minutes per day (his assignment via charter school).

There are wooden pieces that the kids learn to place together to form a capital letter (there are other sets you can buy on ebay for lower case letters).
There is a small wooden chalkboard slate, I write the letter on the slate, ds takes a small piece of wet sponge and traces over the letter that I wrote, this leaves a dark clean spot on the slate, then he writes over it again with chalk. He really likes this. There is also a magnetic board set that comes with magnetic stamps the kids can use to stamp the letters onto the board (basically a magnadoodle).

Things I would/will try if ds has problems with handwriting- have him trace the letters with his fingers; try the writing in pudding/whipped cream/yogurt/another similar medium; I would write the letter on a sheet of white paper, then tape a piece of sand paper underneath and have ds trace the letter/s with crayons (all the colors of the rainbow)- kids love the effect this has on the paper and enjoy using the different colors- it's called *rainbow writing*;

hth, kids are calling again.

[catholicapmom]

I'm using Handwriting Book C by Universal Publishing. And yeah, I use a program I don't unschool. The problem isn't that he can't write, he makes his letters beautifully. :tu It's that he'd rather be doing other things and whines and complains that he doesn't want to and then it takes him all day to do his work.

[Teribear]

Is he at all motivated by timers? If you're certain its not a fine motor issue and wanted to try it, I'd suggest setting a timer and telling him that it must be completed by the time the timer goes off. I wouldn't attach a consequnce to it until you see if he'll rise to the challenge. But the 'natural consequence' of incomplete work is a bad grade isn't it? It might give you a way to disengage from the power struggle. :shrug

[catholicapmom]

I tried that yesterday. Usually a timer is good to get him motivated, but all he did yesterday was stress over the fact that he was losing time. :banghead I gave him plenty of time to do it, too! A half an hour to write 5 words.

[J3K]

The absolute beauty of homeschooling is to be able to drop those things that are frustrating to the parents AND the child.

Your handwriting technique obviously isn't working for him. It's time to try something new.(or not try anything new at all ) He's just a mere five years old. No need to force feed him things he'd rather not do. It's creating stress in him , and doubt in you. Sending him to school would create more stress in him and give you a whole new batch of stresses to worry about it.

This age is all about being creative. Sitting a table with a pencil and a piece of paper to write is a form of torture. WE don't see it that way..but we write on message boards for fun. :giggle We don't have the desires to climb a tree , jump on a trampoline , chase squirrels , make forts with couch cushions , etc...

At this age I was giving no more than one hour of school a day. Stretched out mind you. Not in one block. Five minutes in between swings , ten minutes as I cook dinner , three minutes in the bath tub , fifteen minutes at the park , etc.... Five is far too young to sit still. I know kindergartens across the country do it...and we get stressed damaged five year olds for it.

If he's developmentally on scale , personally I'd drop the forceful handwriting and let him be. He'll develop those skills later. I promise you he won't be a teenager going off to college that doesn't know how to write.

[AprilBr]

We did HWT and Rachel hated it. So now I am printing worksheet paper out and she is copying after me. Sometimes it is a few short quotes and sometimes it is a few verses from her Sparks handbook. She enjoys this way A LOT better. I just make sure her handwriting is neat.

[This Busy Mom]

I'd can the handwriting with a 5 yo too. Mine do it for fun :lol or else I wouldn't even worry about it.

Once you teach him how to make his letters, he'll get handwriting practice other places. Maybe like copying sentences from something he picks out (favorite book?). My ds had really messy handwriting up through the second grade. When I brought him home (he went to ps for part of first grade and all of 2nd), I retaught him how to form his letters (ala Writing Road to Reading) and his print improved dramatically. His cursive is even better, but he won't use it day to day :shrug . I really don't care what he does, truthfully, as he composes most of his writing assignments on the computer. He's 11 now, and I remember writing most of his answers for him when he was 5. He hated writing anything back then (from the kid who begs me every year for a cursive writing program now :shrug :scratch ).

[Moon]

Once my kids have mastered all the letters I drop handwriting for awhlie. *shrug* They get enough handwriting practice in their other subjects that I don't pick it up again until they're ready for cursive or italics.

[jghomeschooler]

I'm using Handwriting Book C by Universal Publishing. And yeah, I use a program I don't unschool. The problem isn't that he can't write, he makes his letters beautifully. It's that he'd rather be doing other things and whines and complains that he doesn't want to and then it takes him all day to do his work.

:tol
oh, so he is able to write his letters. why is it necessary for him to be writing words at this stage? I would be more focused on reading to him, have him practice one letter each day or something like that (if you feel he MUST do handwriting). If you torture him now (this young) with something he just doesn't want to do, then it's possible that he will learn to hate school because of the handwriting. I'd probably just take a break for a bit ( a couple of weeks, then try something much smaller- write a b and c instead of words). Is the handwriting program tied in to teaching him to read/phonics? Can you try using another program? How about have him write one letter- then run around the house and come back and write the next letter- and so on. He doesn't HAVE to sit there and do it all at once, maybe his hand hurts while he's writing, and he needs lots of breaks. I'd try my best to make it fun, and have fun doing it with him. hold his hand and write them with him, get some wikky stiks (sp?) and have him make letters/words out of those or playdough *snakes*, glue scraps of paper or other materials onto letters/words that are printed out on a sheet of paper. I'm sure you'll be able to find something that works. Good luck, prayers, and let us know how things go.

[joystrength]

I'll just add this:

I DON'T have an active 5 1/2 year old! I have an ACTIVE!!!!!!!!!!! 4 1/2 year old, who is worlds (WORLDS!!) away from writing letters! However, this thread is encouraging to me in the sense that I see mamas who are making learning FUN! I see mamas who are creatively working with their children and their individual needs (and I do believe trampoline jumping and tree climbing are NEEDS!!) to KEEP learning fun. I DON'T see mamas saying, "You WILL sit. You WILL write. You WILL yadayadayada!!!" Thanks, mamas!
I could very well be writing a similar email in a year!
:grouphug

[J3K]

Ideas for fun learning adventures...

use twigs to spell things out.

use sidewalk chalk. (it washes off houses too..go ahead ask me how I know...) :giggle

use a cookie sheet full of flour. Have the child use fingers to spell/write.

playdough (I'm partial to the homemade kind personally)....form letters shapes and let it dry...

spell out simple words with BIG objects. have them spell "ME" using shoes. Not as easy as it sounds.

try different mediums...crayons , colored pencils , pens , colored pens , markers , artist chalk , etc...

Try different papers....construction paper , lined paper , unlined paper , graph paper , the borders of old newspapers , magazine pages (experiment...what makes a mark on a glossy magazine page ?)

By giving your child the tools and the freedom to write anywhere on anything available...that writing will come into play.
One time I covered my hallway walls in paper. Literally ceiling to floor. I did it while the kids were sleeping. When they awoke , they found a basket at the end of their beds with writing tools. (just about everything I mentioned above...) THEY LOVED IT. I got all sorts of questions..."Mama how do you spell this word?" to "Momma how do you make a cursive B ?". It was wonderful.

My friends thought I was nuts. We left that paper up until it began to peel away from the walls. OOHHOOOHHHOOHHH

I almost forgot our new favorite...DRY ERASE MARKERS. and a dry erase map. Let them go crazy. Let them draw lines all over it , circle states , find where they live and where gramma lives...ask them to write how long it takes...tell them to write "gramma" above where she lives and "us" above where you live...

Writing practice is all around us if we take ourselves out of the box "Desk , paper , pencil , sit still ".

[KitKat]

I agree, drop the handwriting curriculum. At 5 years old there are more "playful" ways of teaching that. There is no reason to continue something that is frustrating both of you. Remember that at this age you want to foster a LOVE of learning. To drill him on something he hates will not accomplish that goal.

[pneumaphile]

Jennifer, great post about making writing fun, and I have another one to add. . .mailboxes!

If you have a mailbox for each family member (if you can make it realistic looking with a flag to put up when there's mail inside, much the better), kids will have a ball leaving notes for everyone and the whole family is in on it!

[J3K]

I'd forgotten about mailboxes ! we LOVED our mailboxes. It was a hoot.

I had to put a stop to it though when the older kids spoiled it for the younger one. Started leaving junk mail. :giggle...sorry...but even the idea that you can recieve spam in a fake mailbox cracked me up. But the youngest was tired of wondering who left the walmart ad in her fake mailbox. She cried to the family one night "We are supposed to be leaving REAL notes in the boxes. Real letters , real notes. "

I will admit to doing this to her : :hugheart :giggle :shifty

I think if all the kids are younger...that mailbox idea is wonderful. If you got a cantakerous teen and an ornery nearly teen.....maybe not so much.