lovemychildren
09-06-2006, 04:15 PM
I am lost, and I thought here would be the best place to start asking for help (Aside from praying about it). My son, Jakey is a very difficult child, or rather we have a very difficult time with him. We love him soooo much and have the patience of a saint with him. I want the best for him, I really do. We get lots of judgemental comments and looks over him. He is very high emotion, and high needs, and melty-downy and touch sensative etc. He is kind to other children, but can't keep up with them, and doesn't understand what sharing is all about. He's outgoing and will run onto a baseball field of strangers to try and play (melts down when he cant)All the pediatricians we've taken him to act like he's perfectly normal. Which he may be, but we worry why he scratches and slaps himself when he gets upset etc.
I am beginning Kindergarden for my soon to be 5 year old (My Fathers World Curric). We've always been naturally inclined to Unschooling even before I knew what the word was. Everything we do is about real life learning... but more recently my almost 5y/o Nathaniel is wanting work books and things. So that's where MFW comes in for him next month. Anyway--- Back to Jakey. Just turned 3 1/2 in late July. He's a SMART kid. Knows his abc's, numbers to 30, all colors primary and complex (Chartruse!), planets and their major function in ORDER, blah blah-- I mean.. he blows us away with his attention to detail ya know?
He also has some motor skill issues. Drawing isn't his cup of tea. Painting is right up his alley- but he's "immature" in that sense because he wants to paint his WHOLE body and KEEP it that way. And I just can't have paint on my couches etc. Then it's **MELT DOWN CITY** if he doesn't get to stay painted. He can draw a circle and a jagged triangle, so I know the brainwaves are there (His mind wants to do those things), but he just can't really *do* them. We try helping him w/motor skills improvement. Hand strength is VERYYYY weak. Twisting a door knob may make him cry because it's very difficult etc.
Also- he's the RANDOM THOUGHT KING. Example, "Jakey, would you like to join our picnic?" His reply, "He fell off the bridge." I say, "Jakey, what is it you are talking about?" His reply, "Spud- fwom Bob duh Biwdoo." So, I say, "Okay- would you like to join the picnic and tell me more about it?" He replies as he runs out of the room, "The table is all clean! I can play CARS!"
..... :scratch
He's constantly blurting out random things. And gets very flustered VERY easily. He acts almost traumatized if I leave a room, "MOMMY MMOMMY WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUUUUU??" He only wants me when he's upset and it's very verrryyy infantile soothing that makes him feel better. He even asked me once to "Get my Reds Out" (meaning he wanted to breastfeed like his baby sister *1y/o. Yet he stopped nursing at 18mo.) We can't leave anywhere between the hours of 1:00pm and 6:30pm because those are just masssssssssive melt down times.
He *has* started watching 1-3 child videos during the day recently because I can't take them outdoors when it's 100+ degrees and with the baby learning to walk, I've just found it easier to keep them quiet long enough for a bath (and the dangerous walker girl will sit still for a few etc).. but it hasn't seemed to change his behavior much at all. OTHER THAN he can QUOTE the movies word by word. Veggie Tales, Bob the Builder and some Kipper the Dog. I *hate* using videos as a sitter, but I have for the last few weeks as I shower, or if he's very sleepy and needs a rest, it will keep him awake, but allow for him to sit still and get a second wind (He stopped napping but still gets sleepy mid day). *We are typically a NO TV household and we love it that way*
ACK, back to homeschooling-- you see.. all these things I described to say this: I HAVE NO CLUE how I'm going to teach this child. (Other than just casually letting him pick up what he's picked up by repitition- his favorite thing) My Nathaniel is EASY as he learns EXACTLY like I did. LOVED work books and sitting still. MY Jakey on the other hand...I have no clue what I'm going to do. I'm scared because I feel like a cirriculum would be a waste of money.. as it would sit and never be used. Artistic supplies are wonderful but are the cause of MANNNNNNy powerful meltdowns because he doesn't want to clean up at clean up time, or he jumps off the porch or table and wants to paint the couch and kitchen floor. CRAFTY things are too difficult for his tiny little fingers that aren't very nimble or strong at all. But he's the MOST hands ON kind of kid I've EVER seen. Which is puts us between a ROCK and HARD PLACE ... he's HANDS ON all the way (Along w/TONS of repitition) but he's NOT ABLE to use those HANDS the way he wants.. MELT DOWN CITY.
PLEASE- if you knwo ANYONE .. or ARE a parent who has a very difficult time with a child in these aspects.. WHAT did you do????
We want to start him on some sort of PreK type of thing.. because I don't want him falling by the wasteside... and we think he's going to need a few YEARS of it to gain the discipline he needs for an Education.....he can't always just keep learning by wandering aroudn teh house and yard playing.. i mean.. he's got to be shown how to read.. math.. things like that.
Yes he's as smart as a whip, and adorable, beautiful and funny. I just don't know where to go with him. Cuz don't you have to track your progress as a homeschooler? How can I track someone so sporatic? Up down all around, never sitting for anything (except for a cartoon lately :blush).
I am beginning Kindergarden for my soon to be 5 year old (My Fathers World Curric). We've always been naturally inclined to Unschooling even before I knew what the word was. Everything we do is about real life learning... but more recently my almost 5y/o Nathaniel is wanting work books and things. So that's where MFW comes in for him next month. Anyway--- Back to Jakey. Just turned 3 1/2 in late July. He's a SMART kid. Knows his abc's, numbers to 30, all colors primary and complex (Chartruse!), planets and their major function in ORDER, blah blah-- I mean.. he blows us away with his attention to detail ya know?
He also has some motor skill issues. Drawing isn't his cup of tea. Painting is right up his alley- but he's "immature" in that sense because he wants to paint his WHOLE body and KEEP it that way. And I just can't have paint on my couches etc. Then it's **MELT DOWN CITY** if he doesn't get to stay painted. He can draw a circle and a jagged triangle, so I know the brainwaves are there (His mind wants to do those things), but he just can't really *do* them. We try helping him w/motor skills improvement. Hand strength is VERYYYY weak. Twisting a door knob may make him cry because it's very difficult etc.
Also- he's the RANDOM THOUGHT KING. Example, "Jakey, would you like to join our picnic?" His reply, "He fell off the bridge." I say, "Jakey, what is it you are talking about?" His reply, "Spud- fwom Bob duh Biwdoo." So, I say, "Okay- would you like to join the picnic and tell me more about it?" He replies as he runs out of the room, "The table is all clean! I can play CARS!"
..... :scratch
He's constantly blurting out random things. And gets very flustered VERY easily. He acts almost traumatized if I leave a room, "MOMMY MMOMMY WHERE ARE YOUUUUUUUUUU??" He only wants me when he's upset and it's very verrryyy infantile soothing that makes him feel better. He even asked me once to "Get my Reds Out" (meaning he wanted to breastfeed like his baby sister *1y/o. Yet he stopped nursing at 18mo.) We can't leave anywhere between the hours of 1:00pm and 6:30pm because those are just masssssssssive melt down times.
He *has* started watching 1-3 child videos during the day recently because I can't take them outdoors when it's 100+ degrees and with the baby learning to walk, I've just found it easier to keep them quiet long enough for a bath (and the dangerous walker girl will sit still for a few etc).. but it hasn't seemed to change his behavior much at all. OTHER THAN he can QUOTE the movies word by word. Veggie Tales, Bob the Builder and some Kipper the Dog. I *hate* using videos as a sitter, but I have for the last few weeks as I shower, or if he's very sleepy and needs a rest, it will keep him awake, but allow for him to sit still and get a second wind (He stopped napping but still gets sleepy mid day). *We are typically a NO TV household and we love it that way*
ACK, back to homeschooling-- you see.. all these things I described to say this: I HAVE NO CLUE how I'm going to teach this child. (Other than just casually letting him pick up what he's picked up by repitition- his favorite thing) My Nathaniel is EASY as he learns EXACTLY like I did. LOVED work books and sitting still. MY Jakey on the other hand...I have no clue what I'm going to do. I'm scared because I feel like a cirriculum would be a waste of money.. as it would sit and never be used. Artistic supplies are wonderful but are the cause of MANNNNNNy powerful meltdowns because he doesn't want to clean up at clean up time, or he jumps off the porch or table and wants to paint the couch and kitchen floor. CRAFTY things are too difficult for his tiny little fingers that aren't very nimble or strong at all. But he's the MOST hands ON kind of kid I've EVER seen. Which is puts us between a ROCK and HARD PLACE ... he's HANDS ON all the way (Along w/TONS of repitition) but he's NOT ABLE to use those HANDS the way he wants.. MELT DOWN CITY.
PLEASE- if you knwo ANYONE .. or ARE a parent who has a very difficult time with a child in these aspects.. WHAT did you do????
We want to start him on some sort of PreK type of thing.. because I don't want him falling by the wasteside... and we think he's going to need a few YEARS of it to gain the discipline he needs for an Education.....he can't always just keep learning by wandering aroudn teh house and yard playing.. i mean.. he's got to be shown how to read.. math.. things like that.
Yes he's as smart as a whip, and adorable, beautiful and funny. I just don't know where to go with him. Cuz don't you have to track your progress as a homeschooler? How can I track someone so sporatic? Up down all around, never sitting for anything (except for a cartoon lately :blush).