getting rid of pacificer

[Joesmomma]

Hi, We, against what I felt was ok, bought Maggie a pacifer. WE thought she was sucking too much. THis gave my dh an opportuntity to spend time with her witout her crying the entire time. But I am ready to get rid of it. I don't want to have her needing it and it seems to be getting there now. I sleep with her at night, and she doesn't bf to sleep (once we are sleeping and she wakes up to eat, she does eat and fall back asleep), so I rock her, and use the paci for her to suck on as she doesn't seem to want the breast after eating. IF she wakes up at night, she is fed and sometimes still watns to suck, but I am not able to sleep with her bfing. SHe does sleep more soundly if I have her in my arms wrapped in them literally. This I can do for a few hours but not all night as I end up sore in the morning. I use a sling during the day and she naps there alot, and when my son naps I can get her down also, but if she doesn't have the paci or me there, she takes very short naps, and it gets frustrating. I have always been against artifical soothing, but feel I am AP her in every other way. The only time she gets the paci is during naps, going to sleep, and at night, not as a way to quiet her down. I want to throw them away. but how do I get her to sleep, and back to sleep when she wants to suck after eating? My son was obviously not like this, he fell asleep on the breast all the time. PLEASE HELP
Therese

[Dana Joy]

how old is your baby?
imo if she's younger then 15 months and already loving the pacifier- you should just stick with it. you have to be available for your son, and being ap isn't a checklist- it looks different for every family- you can be ap and use a binkie imo.
if she's 15 months or older what has worked for us is cutting the tip off the bink and gradually make the hole bigger. they seem placated because your giving them what they ask for, but since it doesn't work the way they are used to they quickly move on. just my 2 cents though there may be better ideas out there.

[Joesmomma]

she is 11 weeks

[Can Dance]

well honestly I would probably keep it until she is a bit older. If she likes it that much anyway. Harvery Karp doesn't think its such a bad thing to use until they are through the 4th trimester, which is about 3-4 months. they need to suck a lot at 11 weeks.
don't stress about it. especially if its helping. you are doing everything else the way you want. every baby is different. :hug

[MarynMunchkins]

Colin is 22 months and loves his papi. :) It makes him feel better, isn't interferring in our nursing at all, is actively sucked on, and has nothing to do with me. I try not to let my vanity (i.e., he's "too big" to have it) get in the way of his need to suck. :)

[Kcross]

Ive done quit a bit of research on this very issue, both of my "big" babies ages almost 3 and age 2 still use their "bink" for naps, bedtime and when they are hurt or upset. My conclusion through what I feel and also through the research states that a pacifier does not hurt them in the least until about age 5, now I know that seems a bit "old" but that is what the medical studies are now saying . I too feel a bit :blush when out and here they both are with binks in their mouths, but hey it makes them happy, and it is a sense of security for them, and why take that away if it isnt hurting them? Just one more example of tuning in to our children's needs and as long as it does not hurt them...why not?

I promise they wont be going to kindergarten with one ...or homeschool as our case will be :)

[Amber]

I was really anti-binky before I had ds. But ds ended up having a high suck need. So we gave him a binky on occasion. After a couple of months we limited the binky use to naps, night and car rides. He did fine with that, and gave up the binky completly by six months.

At 11 weeks I wouldn't be too concerned with her giving it up. If it helps her sleep and feel better. Using a binky doesn't mean you aren't AP...my son had a binky, and we don't co-sleep (we have a double bed there isn't enough room) but I still consider myself AP.

[lovinmama]

My ds (18mos) still uses mr. binks for naps, bedtime, and occasionally in the car (if they're long car rides). I figure its fine if he's happy, I know he won't use it forever. He rarely uses it in public either, which isn't a big deal for me, but is for others in my family. 11 weeks seems like too early to take it away, she obviously has a higher need to suck and it sounds like mr. binks is doing the trick for now.

[Maggie]

I thought about getting Luke a pacifier, but decided against it. He will take my little finger to suck on when he doesn't want to suck at the breast. He still takes very short naps and I hold him almost all the time. How old is your older child? You have to go with what works best for you and the baby. If her needs can't be met w/out the pacifier, much better to use one than to have the little one crying more, KWIM?