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October 21, 2005
About Children Sitting Through the Church Service
by flowermama
Some churches (though not many Protestant ones, it seems!) encourage parents to have their children stay in the church service with them. Rather than taking them to nursery or "children's church," the family worships together.
The idea sounds like a really wonderful thing. In fact it's what our family does. One of the concerns, though, is that it can be highly stressful for both parents and their children when their children are still learning to sit in the service.
For those who have been led down this path, I know it can be all too easy to want your child to learn *now*. Sometimes we bring that pressure upon ourselves by comparing our kids to other children. "Look at ____'s children! They sit through the service and are so quiet and good!" Sometimes we feel an urgent need to have them learn quickly because we are afraid what others will think about us and our parenting style. Sometimes we worry that we are distracting others from hearing the sermon. Sometimes we simply want to sit and listen to the sermon ourselves!
The fact is, though, that sometimes it takes awhile, and that is okay. Every child is different. Some children actually easily sit through the service early on, but others find it to be a real struggle to learn.
Jesus said, "Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven" (Matthew 9:17 NASB). Little children are loved dearly by God, and it's good to bring them to Him and to worship Him, but we should keep in mind that it's our job as parents to come alongside and guide them and teach them and help them learn in ways that will help nurture their trust and love in God our Father, our Abba Daddy.
When considering how to teach our little ones, let's consider not only the "effectiveness," but also what the other end results of our methods might be. We don't want our children who find it hard to learn to be fearful of Him! We don't want them to associate church with being hit by us.
I understand the pressure, I do! I've experienced the anxiety it can bring. But I encourage parents to try other methods of teaching their little ones about worshipping God together as a family. There are other effective, and kind and gentle, ways. And I encourage you to lay your anxiety at Jesus' feet. And even though you may miss out on some of the sermon (consider getting a tape of the sermon if possible!), when you are ministering to your children, you are doing a good thing. You are worshipping Jesus through your actions. You are showing Him love and honoring Him by taking care of the little ones He has entrusted into your care. His grace is abounding, and He will meet your needs.
I'll save going into possible ways to teach them for another day. And hopefully another one of our writers here will be writing a blog entry on this soon. 
Posted by flowermama at October 21, 2005 11:04 AM
Comments
Thank you for this, Jeri. It really blessed me this morning.
Posted by: nebraskanmom at October 31, 2005 05:46 AM
I really like this church's attitude towards children, as well as their practical attention to it:
Posted by: TulipGirl at November 12, 2005 10:27 PM
Thank you, Liz! ((hugs))
Tulipmama("Girl" :)) -- Oh, yes! That article was really encouraging to me when my oldest was little. I haven't read it for a long time, and I'm really glad you shared that link! Thank you! :)
Posted by: flowermama ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/weblog/nav-commenters.gif)
at November 13, 2005 03:31 PM
Interesting points; however, it is good to point out that not all churches (including Protestant) are either/or. My church offers many options that will work best for each individual family. We do not require parents to put their children elsewhere during the service, nor are we anti-Christian Education programs.
I grew up Protestant and have only fond memories of my wonderful Sunday School teachers and the seeds they planted in me, and want my children to have that same wonderful experience!
Great stuff, looking forward to seeing your other blog entry!
Posted by: jandsmama at November 15, 2005 07:17 AM
