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Gentle Discipline

Correct your son, and he will give you comfort; He will also delight your soul.
~ Proverbs 29:17

"Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me."
~ Matthew 25:40

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
~ Ephesians 6:4

Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.
~ Colossians 3:21

Gentle discipline is neither permissive or punitive. Children need active guidance and well-established boundaries, but children can learn without punishment. We believe that fear and purposely-inflicted pain have no place in gentle, loving, Biblical discipline, and children should be discipled from birth with an appropriate mixture of kindness and firmness in a manner that respects their feelings and their developmental, emotional, and daily needs.

~ from the GCM Statement of Beliefs and slightly expanded

Mama-to-Mama Support

If you are seeking support from other mamas, please visit our Gentle Disciplineforum. We also have a Gentle Discipline Info and FAQs forum that you might find to be helpful. Everyone can read the posts in both of those forums, but if you want to post you first need to join our message board.


A Shebet (Rod)
  • Disciplining Babies
    by Jeri Carr
  • Discipline for Toddlers
    by Jeri Carr
  • Discipline Ideas for Toddlers
    by Jeri Carr
  • Proactive Discipline and Well-Behaved Children
    by Becky Jackson
  • Grace-Based Discipline by Crystal Lutton
  • The Five Steps Technique by Crystal Lutton
  • Why Not Time-Outs by Crystal Lutton
  • Choosing not to Spank
    by Laurie Morgan
  • To Spank or Not to Spank?
    by Elizabeth Pantley
  • Boot Camp for Babies
    by Rebecca Prewett
  • The Rod or Shebet: An Indepth Examination by Joan Renae - A Christian Who Does Not Spank? A close examination on the "rod" Scriptures in Proverbs.
  • Helping Our Children Keep the Fifth Commandment
    by Carolyn C. Waterbury-Tieman

    Links to Other Websites

    (These links will open in a new window.)

  • Arms of Love Family Fellowship - Read articles by author of Biblical Parenting, Crystal Lutton. In her articles she explains what Grace-Based Discipline is, shares helpful discipline tools, explains the history of spanking, and more. Crystal is also an admin on the GCM message board and helps to moderate, among other forums, the Gentle Discipline forum. Be sure to check out her website and the GD forum.
  • Child Discipline - On the Parenting Decisions website.
  • Suffer the Little Children
  • Positive Discipline Resource Center
  • The Center for Effective Discipline

    Recommended Books

    Recommended by members of the GCM message board

    (These links will open in a new window.)

    About Biblical Parenting

    ". . . she [Crystal] addresses the whole philosophy of what grace based means and gives tools to make every day discipline a reality." ~ makeesha

    ". . . it is very easy to read and the principles can be applied to any family situation." ~ mama_of_three

    You can order Crystal's book through Amazon.com, or you can order an autographed copy, and also a companion workbook, through her website.

    About Playful Parenting

    "The book is *so* good!!! I wish that I had read it sooner . . . It is such a practical and wonderful book. It is a PD [positive discipline] must read!" ~ Ariana

  • Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline: The 7 Basic Skills for Turning Conflict into Cooperation by Becky A. Bailey
  • Kids are Worth It! Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline by Barbara Coloroso
  • Families where Grace is in Place by Jeff Vanvonderen
    This book has helped us really sort out alot of problems in our lives. . . . I really think most of my discipline issues were because other issues needing some straightening up first. . . it's a great book. ~ OjaiMommie
  • Relational Parenting: Going Beyond Your Child's Behavior to Meet Their Deepest Needs by Ross Campbell M.D.
  • Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles: Winning for a Lifetime by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka
  • Parent Effectiveness Training by Thomas Gordon
  • Between Parent and Child by Dr. Haim G Ginott
  • Disciplining Children With Confidence by Grace P. Chou
  • Raising Your Spirited Child: A Guide for Parents Whose Child Is More Intense, Sensitive, Perceptive, Persistent, Energetic by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka
    . . . unfortunately named because it has great info for parents of all kinds of kids. ~ ArmsOfLove
  • Living With the Active Alert Child: Groundbreaking Strategies for Parents by Linda S., Ph.D. Budd
    For those with truly hard to understand and discipline children I recommend "Living with the Active-Alert Child" by Linda S. Budd, PhD. Although some of her tools tend towards the punitive many of the things you see us discuss here [in the Gentle Discipline forum] were adapted from her ideas. ~ ArmsOfLove
  • Your Two-Year-Old: Terrible or Tender by Louise Bates Ames


  • When Anger Hurts Your Kids by Matthew McKay, Kim Paleg, Patrick Fanning, Dana Landis
  • Love and Anger: The Parental Dilemma by Nancy Samalin

    Audio Cassette


    "Joseph: King of Dreams" is a fantastic family movie that teaches not only a Biblical story but many Biblical principles. There are many issues of particular interest for the Gentle Christian Family. We see what can happen when parents show favoritism with a new baby in the home without including and validating older siblings; we have a beautiful example of how the rod is best used to defend the sheep from the attacking predator (and not used *on* the sheep as many would have us believe); and Joseph surrenders his life to the Lord's leading accompanied by a beautiful song that admits the truth, "Lord, You know better than I." Family members of all ages will enjoy this cartoon movie from the makers of "Moses: Prince of Egypt."

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    Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

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