For mommas with onlies: More social opportunities or not?

Hi,

For mommas with onlies, do you ensure that your child participates in more activities and/or has more access to playmates/relatives, etc If so, what types of things do you do? I know that children don't have to have a full schedule or be involved with lots of children very often, I am just curious since my ds is currently an only and may very well be an only child.

We are planning to homeschool and one day I am 100% sure we will, then the next day I am like, what about the local Montesorri school or the Christian Academy? My dh will be beginning certification to be an Elem. school teacher this year and my ds could go to his school if he wants.

Dh is all for homeschooling and so am I, I just get a little afraid at times about paying back the student loans.

Anyway, thanks for listening!

[ellies mom]

Before I went back to school and Ellie started the wonderful program on campus, we belonged to an indoor play park coop. We would usually go 2-3 times a week. So she got to see the same group of kids all the time and I made some great mom friends. The park closed down the month before Ellie started in the program a year ago but she stills sees those kids on a regular basis.

Most of them are set up in large rooms with a ton of the larger type toys and other "big movement" toys and the kids just play. Ours also had activities such as a monthly gymnastics class and holiday type parties. With that I didn't feel too much of a need to put her in other classes. And now that she goes "to school" two days a week she gets her social interaction there.

Originally Posted by ellies mom

Before I went back to school and Ellie started the wonderful program on campus, we belonged to an indoor play park coop. We would usually go 2-3 times a week. So she got to see the same group of kids all the time and I made some great mom friends. The park closed down the month before Ellie started in the program a year ago but she stills sees those kids on a regular basis.

Most of them are set up in large rooms with a ton of the larger type toys and other "big movement" toys and the kids just play. Ours also had activities such as a monthly gymnastics class and holiday type parties. With that I didn't feel too much of a need to put her in other classes. And now that she goes "to school" two days a week she gets her social interaction there.

If you don't mind me asking, how long does she stay at her 'school' on the 2 days a week? Do you go with her? Do you have to pay a fee? I think we have one of those indoor type parks here, I think it's 4 dollars an hour?

[ellies mom]

Currently, DD is in school 6 hours a day twice a week, so 12 hours a week total. She goes to school on the days I have class and DH is scheduled to work. Because of my school hours on those two days, she is there for both the morning and afternoon curriculum as well as lunch. I have to earn a credit to keep her in the program and there are several ways I can do it including spending time in the classroom. Unfortunately my spending time in the classroom is not usually very helpful so I typically earn the credit through the educational offerings. I'm a student so I pay $164 a month (depends on the number of hours). I know the pay scale and scheduling is different for non-students. I love Ellie's program. I chose it because it was affordable and flexible (my hours change every 12 weeks) but it turns out that the school philosophy is very similar to my own so it has worked out extremely well for both of us.

As for play parks, ours was a co-op, we paid $90 a year (Sept-May) and people took turns setting up and putting away the toys. The play parks that are in community centers are typically drop-in and in our area charge $2-4 a visit. A good place to find one in your area is the through the library, community centers, sometimes they advertise through hospitals, doctors offices and grocery store bulletins. Joining our play park was seriously one of the best things I did.

[chelsea]

For some reason I woke up thinking about this very thing , so I did a seach and here was a thread on the topic I was wondering about! Thanks for asking the question!
Ds is 4 and I am most likely going to homeschool (he could begin this fall or next fall). He is an only child though, and I am a single mom so it's not like there is ever going to be siblings for my little guy. Sometimes I think that homeschooling might be better for families with more children, because then the kids are having their "other kids" needs met. But at the same time, why should I deny my son home education simply because he is an only child? I drive myself batty thinking about it. :/
Lately, ds has been saying "I want to play with other kids" (guess I'm boring him ). And although right now it's easy to call up someone with kids and have them over, that will be difficult once everyone else is in public school and are not available for "playdates".
I'm thinking that once school has begun, I will get involved in a local homeschool group so he can have "field trip" type things to look forward to, and maybe meet a group of kids that he sees on a regular basis. Also, there are a few things I plan to register ds in, such as soccer, music, etc. I totally do NOT believe in "over-lessoning" children, but I think that when kids are home-educated, there is more leeway there, because they don't have to be up and going to a school outside their home everyday. A home-educated child who is in a few extracurricular lessons is typically going to have a much more free schedule than one in public or private school, even one who is not in extra lessons. So I feel that as homeschoolers, our kids have more flexibility to work with to be able to pursue other things they are interested in.
I'd love to hear more opinions on this too!

Originally Posted by chelsea

For some reason I woke up thinking about this very thing , so I did a seach and here was a thread on the topic I was wondering about! Thanks for asking the question!
Ds is 4 and I am most likely going to homeschool (he could begin this fall or next fall). He is an only child though, and I am a single mom so it's not like there is ever going to be siblings for my little guy. Sometimes I think that homeschooling might be better for families with more children, because then the kids are having their "other kids" needs met. But at the same time, why should I deny my son home education simply because he is an only child? I drive myself batty thinking about it. :/
Lately, ds has been saying "I want to play with other kids" (guess I'm boring him ). And although right now it's easy to call up someone with kids and have them over, that will be difficult once everyone else is in public school and are not available for "playdates".
I'm thinking that once school has begun, I will get involved in a local homeschool group so he can have "field trip" type things to look forward to, and maybe meet a group of kids that he sees on a regular basis. Also, there are a few things I plan to register ds in, such as soccer, music, etc. I totally do NOT believe in "over-lessoning" children, but I think that when kids are home-educated, there is more leeway there, because they don't have to be up and going to a school outside their home everyday. A home-educated child who is in a few extracurricular lessons is typically going to have a much more free schedule than one in public or private school, even one who is not in extra lessons. So I feel that as homeschoolers, our kids have more flexibility to work with to be able to pursue other things they are interested in.
I'd love to hear more opinions on this too!

Hey,

Our avatars have the same dress!

Yes, I totally feel what you are saying and my ds loves to play with kids too. So.....we found a support group recently (not because he likes to play with kids, I was just mentioning it) G had lots of fun at the first day at the park. He played hard and slept hard!!

I think it's great that we plan to homeschool our onlies and if you really think about it, people always say that socialization is not as important as society makes it seems...so....maybe even if you have an only child, he/she is in that same category, he/she just doesn't have playmates that are siblings.

I looked at your list of things that you have lined up and it looks great! We both have to remember to keep things balanced because we could try to overcompensate since our little ones don't have siblings.

Even when the other kids are back in school, there are still homeschool support groups around and since most kids get out around here around 3, the local parks are filled to the brim with friends and not only that, in the summer, they are always around!!

Ill hold out for more 'thoughts' about this too...

[chelsea]

Originally Posted by GREGORYSMOM

Hey,

Our avatars have the same dress!

Lol, I didn't realize that until I came back to read the reply and saw them side by side and was thinking "Hey, we are wearing the same dress!"
I agree that we may try and "overcompensate" with an only child. That is a good thing to keep in mind.
Glad your little guy enjoyed his day at the park! Was that through the support group? I've been wondering if I have to wait to join a homeschool support group until ds is actually in a "grade", or if I can join since I have intentions of beginning homeschool when he is technically old enough. Though isn't that silly, since we actually "homeschool" our babies from the time they are born!

Originally Posted by chelsea

Lol, I didn't realize that until I came back to read the reply and saw them side by side and was thinking "Hey, we are wearing the same dress!"
I agree that we may try and "overcompensate" with an only child. That is a good thing to keep in mind.
Glad your little guy enjoyed his day at the park! Was that through the support group? I've been wondering if I have to wait to join a homeschool support group until ds is actually in a "grade", or if I can join since I have intentions of beginning homeschool when he is technically old enough. Though isn't that silly, since we actually "homeschool" our babies from the time they are born!

Hi,

We just joined through the internet yahoo group, then we met them for park day. He is only 2 and is the youngest there, but he had so much fun. I think they were age ranges 4-16. Most groups will let you join at any point. You can email or call the group leader if you are able to get that information. I just kinda 'showed up' and they were all very friendly and cool about it

[lenswyf]

We haven't tried to fill our schedule or been focused on ensuring that we have "social opportunities," but we have built some things into our homeschool schedule that do provide some social interaction. Our schedule includes:

Tuesday: Homeschool Gym and Swim at the YMCA
Wednesday: AWANAs at a local church
Friday: "Friday School" with our local homeschool cooperative, followed by play at a park or a playdate with a friend.
Sunday: Church and, often, activities with friends

Ds has always been very socially inclined, and before we moved, I also did childcare for a friend who worked parttime and needed child care two afternoons a week. That built in two playdates, and we often got together with other homeschooling friends for an hour or two here or there. Now that we've moved, I have to be a bit more conscientious, but we are trying to have one playdate each week with someone to accomodate his love for his friends. It's harder where we live now, which is 25-45 minutes from most of our closer friends.

I imagine my son gets as much social interaction as kids in school. After all, their main times to "legally" interact are going to be at lunch and recess, maybe some in PE.