If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet

Emerald Orchid · 05-06-2012, 05:15 AM

I went to my first homeschooling conference yesterday (really awesome, I'm so excited about our choice to HS

), and I had been told on GCM that homeschooling often equals Babywise.

I was attending my third session of the day and this session was unfortunately quite boring. The lady offered almost no practical advice and she kept going on and on about her 5 kids.

Then the subject comes up of babies sleeping through the night. She starts saying that she used a program that spaced feedings every 3 hours, but couldn't remember the name, and that her babies all STTN at 3 months. She adds, "Don't worry, it's not torture, it's great!" If you have to qualify your program with "it's not torture", I think there has to be something off!

A mom raises her hand and says, "I used Babywise and my 2 children STTN at 2 months!"

I raised my hand, boiling inside, and I said, "The AAP has issued a statement against Babywise because it causes failure to thrive in babies."

The speaker fumbles a little, says something I can't remember, and goes on to say that as a missionary to Hungary, Hungarians couldn't believe she was doing that to her babies, that they can't stand for a baby to even cry for 2 minutes, because Hungarians are so "soft-hearted". A mom speaks up and says, "Then I must be Hungarian!"

Everyone laughed and the topic moved on.

I actually "know" who the speaker was, we were in the same (cult-like) ministry for years. She referred to the mom who suggested Babywise, who I also know very well, I went to Christian school with her kids. And let me tell you that as adults, all 4 of her children have turned out really poorly. Why would I take her baby training advice 25 years later?

It's come to my attention since becoming a mom that the "grace-based ministry" I used to be part of seems to be as mainstream and Ezzo as anyone else out there. I always thought, grace extends to adults, why not babies? Babies do not deserve grace or a learning curve, apparently.

tigerlily · 05-06-2012, 05:46 AM

Thank you for speaking up!

I'm also thankful for the other mom who spoke up.

I'm also now totally impressed with Hungarians.

BarefootBetsy · 05-06-2012, 11:09 AM

Yes, thank you for speaking up and for sharing the story here

I had no idea that Hungarians were horrified by babies crying either

That's awesome!

I'm sorry that this group hasn't been as grace-filled as you thought they were

It's always difficult to realize that people you care about or respect are involved in something that you know to be cruel or Biblically unsound

Stiina · 05-06-2012, 11:14 AM

Another

for you for speaking up with concise and factual words!! That's great of you.

Emerald Orchid · 05-06-2012, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BarefootBetsy

I'm sorry that this group hasn't been as grace-filled as you thought they were

It's always difficult to realize that people you care about or respect are involved in something that you know to be cruel or Biblically unsound

It's yet another disappointment about them, but I haven't been a part of that ministry for a good 5 years, so it's just one more thing to add the long list of yucky/abusive stuff that went on while I was unaware.

Thank God my eyes have been opened!

katiekind · 05-06-2012, 01:27 PM

Quote:

that they can't stand for a baby to even cry for 2 minutes, because Hungarians are so "soft-hearted". A mom speaks up and says, "Then I must be Hungarian!"

We are all Hungarians now!

mwwr · 05-06-2012, 04:19 PM

Yay for Hungarians!

SweetCaroline · 05-07-2012, 01:44 PM

good for you.

im with ya on that. BW *never* gets a ride in my presence

Hermana Linda · 05-07-2012, 05:16 PM

My mother is Hungarian and we are related by marriage to Emmi Pikler.

05-06-2012, 05:15 AM	#1
Emerald Orchid Rose Garden Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Québec, Canada Posts: 8,591	If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet I went to my first homeschooling conference yesterday (really awesome, I'm so excited about our choice to HS ), and I had been told on GCM that homeschooling often equals Babywise. I was attending my third session of the day and this session was unfortunately quite boring. The lady offered almost no practical advice and she kept going on and on about her 5 kids. Then the subject comes up of babies sleeping through the night. She starts saying that she used a program that spaced feedings every 3 hours, but couldn't remember the name, and that her babies all STTN at 3 months. She adds, "Don't worry, it's not torture, it's great!" If you have to qualify your program with "it's not torture", I think there has to be something off! A mom raises her hand and says, "I used Babywise and my 2 children STTN at 2 months!" I raised my hand, boiling inside, and I said, "The AAP has issued a statement against Babywise because it causes failure to thrive in babies." The speaker fumbles a little, says something I can't remember, and goes on to say that as a missionary to Hungary, Hungarians couldn't believe she was doing that to her babies, that they can't stand for a baby to even cry for 2 minutes, because Hungarians are so "soft-hearted". A mom speaks up and says, "Then I must be Hungarian!" Everyone laughed and the topic moved on. I actually "know" who the speaker was, we were in the same (cult-like) ministry for years. She referred to the mom who suggested Babywise, who I also know very well, I went to Christian school with her kids. And let me tell you that as adults, all 4 of her children have turned out really poorly. Why would I take her baby training advice 25 years later? It's come to my attention since becoming a mom that the "grace-based ministry" I used to be part of seems to be as mainstream and Ezzo as anyone else out there. I always thought, grace extends to adults, why not babies? Babies do not deserve grace or a learning curve, apparently. __________________ French-Canadian / Reader / TrailRunner / T4 / INTj / Wife to S SAHM to 3 DS Z (8.5) M (6.5) and T (3.5) Adopting from China

05-06-2012, 05:46 AM	#2
tigerlily Rose Garden Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Into the sky, all the way out. Posts: 7,377	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet Thank you for speaking up! I'm also thankful for the other mom who spoke up. I'm also now totally impressed with Hungarians. __________________ Hi! I'm Robin married 13 years to my best friend mama to two ~ 9 & 6 years old ‎"Don't they teach recreational maths anymore?" ~The Doctor

05-06-2012, 11:09 AM	#3
BarefootBetsy Rose Garden "You are on the path...exactly where you are meant to be." Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Seeking Simplicity Posts: 12,684	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet Yes, thank you for speaking up and for sharing the story here I had no idea that Hungarians were horrified by babies crying either That's awesome! I'm sorry that this group hasn't been as grace-filled as you thought they were It's always difficult to realize that people you care about or respect are involved in something that you know to be cruel or Biblically unsound __________________ Barefooting through life with dh (2003), dd1 (11/05), dd2 (7/07), dd3 (11/09), and ds (8/13). Unless explicitly stated otherwise, any views or opinions presented in the above posts are solely those of BarefootBetsy, the GCM member, and do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of anyone else in the entire world.

05-06-2012, 11:14 AM	#4
Stiina Rose Garden Not Sharing Exuberantly Anymore Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 9,507	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet Another for you for speaking up with concise and factual words!! That's great of you.

05-06-2012, 04:19 PM	#7
mwwr Deactivated It is good to be Queen! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Nothin' could be finer... Posts: 8,231	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet Yay for Hungarians!

05-07-2012, 01:44 PM	#8
SweetCaroline Rose Garden a little Attachment Parenting will fix that Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 3,981	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet good for you. im with ya on that. BW never gets a ride in my presence __________________ Gently mothering 5 babes one day at a time, only by the help of my Lord - ages 11,6,5, 4, & 2 Nonviolence is not sterile passivity, but a powerful moral force which makes for social transformation. -- Martin Luther King, Jr. ISFP

05-07-2012, 05:16 PM	#9
Hermana Linda Administrator "air-mannah Leen-dah" it means Sister Linda in Spanish Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 51,860	Re: If you praise Ezzo, there's no chance I'm going to stay quiet My mother is Hungarian and we are related by marriage to Emmi Pikler. __________________ My pages: Why Not Train A Child? and the FB Page as well as @WhyNotTrain on Twitter Read about how my husband was Pulled From The River By God

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