playgroup question

Rbonmom · 09-05-2005, 10:32 PM

I have just joined a new playgroup for moms of babies under 1. So far it's pretty small and we are rotating houses each week. I am very anti-spanking and want to make sure our home is a safe zone for ds to know he will be protected in. I want to make sure people know that my home is a no-spank zone but I don't want them to feel unwelcome or that I'm trying to tell them how to parent. I just worry that some moms will flick or slap their baby's hands, or spank an older child. I know in the moment is not a good time to bring up the topic. What should I do? Should I just not anything and hope it never comes up, or should I tell the mom's up front. I don't really know the moms well yet, so I don't want to make people think I'm some kind of a freak or something. What would you do?

joyful mama · 09-06-2005, 12:08 AM

Hmmm... I've been involved in a playgroup with a small group of women, all from very different backgrounds, and also part of a much larger playgroup from church, both for over a year, and it's never been an issue for us

. Maybe once in a whole year one mom slapped a hand... and that's all I can think of. I personally wouldn't say much, unless there is a mom who you are really worried about- very vocal, always spanking in front of others, etc. You could always bring up AP casually and see what ensues... but since AP is so much of who we are, it usually becomes obvious the type of parent you are rather quickly, kwim? Anyhow, I don't think I'd bring it up, or worry about it too much. Chances are you'll have a great time with a great group of people, even if you don't agree on all parenting issues... JMHO

MarynMunchkins · 09-06-2005, 05:20 AM

I wouldn't risk not saying anything.

If you're hosting, I'd just say "BTW, this is a non-spanking home. It's not allowed in our house."

Who knows? You might open up a whole host of doors to introduce people to GBD.

09-07-2005, 10:28 AM

It's funny... I was laying awake at night thinking about what I would do in a situation like that... and for no particular reason b/c we do not host any type of group in our home.

How many playgroups have you attended so far with this group of Moms? What have you observed? Can you arrange it so your house is near the end of the rotation so that you have some more time to make observations and get to know everyone before it's time to broach the issue? That might give you a better feel for how best to approach things.

I'll be reading with interest...

09-05-2005, 10:32 PM	#1
Rbonmom Rose Garden Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 10,661	playgroup question I have just joined a new playgroup for moms of babies under 1. So far it's pretty small and we are rotating houses each week. I am very anti-spanking and want to make sure our home is a safe zone for ds to know he will be protected in. I want to make sure people know that my home is a no-spank zone but I don't want them to feel unwelcome or that I'm trying to tell them how to parent. I just worry that some moms will flick or slap their baby's hands, or spank an older child. I know in the moment is not a good time to bring up the topic. What should I do? Should I just not anything and hope it never comes up, or should I tell the mom's up front. I don't really know the moms well yet, so I don't want to make people think I'm some kind of a freak or something. What would you do? __________________ Blessed to be a gentle-striving, hs'ing, single mama to 8yr ds, the boy who stole my heart, and calls me mom. Prayerfully awaiting the arrival of the child God has for me! Pediatric ICU Nurse

09-06-2005, 12:08 AM	#2
joyful mama Rose Garden Word of God speak... Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 18,661	Re: playgroup question Hmmm... I've been involved in a playgroup with a small group of women, all from very different backgrounds, and also part of a much larger playgroup from church, both for over a year, and it's never been an issue for us . Maybe once in a whole year one mom slapped a hand... and that's all I can think of. I personally wouldn't say much, unless there is a mom who you are really worried about- very vocal, always spanking in front of others, etc. You could always bring up AP casually and see what ensues... but since AP is so much of who we are, it usually becomes obvious the type of parent you are rather quickly, kwim? Anyhow, I don't think I'd bring it up, or worry about it too much. Chances are you'll have a great time with a great group of people, even if you don't agree on all parenting issues... JMHO __________________ Jen Married to my knight in shining armor Work-in-progress mother to my three awesome kids: S (8), T (6) and the Little Guy (3) ...and always remembering our little angel

09-06-2005, 05:20 AM	#3
MarynMunchkins Deactivated Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 38,127	Re: playgroup question I wouldn't risk not saying anything. If you're hosting, I'd just say "BTW, this is a non-spanking home. It's not allowed in our house." Who knows? You might open up a whole host of doors to introduce people to GBD.

09-07-2005, 10:28 AM	#4
Katherine Guest Posts: n/a	Re: playgroup question It's funny... I was laying awake at night thinking about what I would do in a situation like that... and for no particular reason b/c we do not host any type of group in our home. How many playgroups have you attended so far with this group of Moms? What have you observed? Can you arrange it so your house is near the end of the rotation so that you have some more time to make observations and get to know everyone before it's time to broach the issue? That might give you a better feel for how best to approach things. I'll be reading with interest...

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