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10-04-2017, 06:10 PM | #1 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
This is NOT about any conversation I've seen on GCM but about conversations, discussions, and debates I've seen mostly on facebook.
I'm so tired of people jumping to the EXTREMES in arguments. We've all heard the "If you don't spank they'll never learn" "If you don't punish they will be spoiled brats and go to jail" "If you don't (something unnecessarily harsh) they won't learn that the real world is harsh and unforgiving and they will expect the world to bow to their whims and not be able to function in the real world" I love having good discussions about many, many topics under the sun. Esp gentle parenting, vaccines, circumcision, bible, spanking, CIO, unschooling/homeschooling. I don't even mind when they get heated. I do mind when someone says "we should spank because toddlers will die if they run into the road!!!" That is an extreme situation. Most of what we are talking about are toddlers pulling down stacks of folded laundry , screaming over a cup of water , or loving a baby a little too enthusiastically I'm currently looking for a good article and/or youtube video on how to discuss/debate a topic well that I can post everytime someone uses an extreme/rare situation as a blanket example of why it's appropriate all the time in all situations; and logical fallacies. Also While I understand logical fallacies I have to constantly go back and read about them because I forget their names etc, get them mixed up. It is so frustrating because I can't just point out the problems with someone's arguments, I have to go research it and by the time it is done often the opportunity to point it out is over. Anyone else struggling with this?
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo Last edited by SewingGreenMama; 10-04-2017 at 06:12 PM. Reason: Edited to correct emojis lol |
10-04-2017, 07:38 PM | #2 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 16,746
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Like the CNN lawyer who said she wasn't sorry for the "Republicans" who died in Vegas?
....... I am guilty of doing this 1. when it's a passionate issue for me 2. when I am emotional for whatever reason.....whether or not it's related to the conversation ........ Did you realize this was in a public forum?
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ENFp Wife who is thankful to be in love....17 years Homeschooling Mom of three....15 DD dancer and 12 DS mountain biker and 5 DD calico critter and dolly mommy 12/2014 8/2015 11/2015 9/2016 |
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10-04-2017, 08:05 PM | #3 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Yes. That's fine.
I may change the title. I realized I really want a discussion about having a good discussion/debate and how to deal with people who use extremes and logical fallacies in their arguments. Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo |
10-04-2017, 08:25 PM | #4 | |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 16,746
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Quote:
"how to deal with people who use extremes and logical fallacies" like me I think you deal with me just fine. Give the same grace you give to me to others on the Internet. I think the internet is a poor substitute for real communication, and it's even easier to lose your mind here. ie say stuff you wouldn't say to a person, let alone a friend, in person. Like you'd think more before speaking?
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ENFp Wife who is thankful to be in love....17 years Homeschooling Mom of three....15 DD dancer and 12 DS mountain biker and 5 DD calico critter and dolly mommy 12/2014 8/2015 11/2015 9/2016 |
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10-04-2017, 08:40 PM | #5 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
You did
I just realized people may interpret my post through my title which is mostly saying this is a rant, which it partially is but I also want a conversation about how to handle this and not fall into the traps ourselves. I've been guilty in the past as well. While the internet isn't always the best place for these discussions, more and more it's becoming the most common place to have these discussions and resources on how to discuss these well and accurately and well is information I want close by and easy to to pass on to those who want/need it. Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo |
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10-04-2017, 11:17 PM | #6 |
Deactivated
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 7,781
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
At some point, I changed how I talk to most people in group discussions. I tend to ask questions in the direction I want to go rather than state info. Group discussions are really hard, they are so much more productive when 1:1.
Sent from my EVA-L09 using Tapatalk |
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10-05-2017, 01:30 AM | #7 | |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 9,120
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Quote:
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10-05-2017, 05:33 AM | #8 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Mayflower I just watched a good video on YouTube about developing a good discussion questions.
Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk ---------- Post added at 08:33 AM ---------- Previous post was at 08:28 AM ---------- https://youtu.be/EXK-UOMIcNM Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo |
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10-05-2017, 10:25 AM | #9 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 27,356
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Have you read Nonviolent Communication?
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Erin born of water and of the Spirit 4/96 married 5/02 Mama to: 2004 2007 2010 2012 2017 2019 Jan 2, 2024 And many I hope to hold in heaven one day |
10-05-2017, 10:29 AM | #10 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Yes, but not in a while.
I own it on audible. I need to listen. To it again. Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo |
10-05-2017, 12:16 PM | #11 |
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 34,551
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
I know what you mean. For me the problem has been the venue. I feel like here on GCM or places where people are connected in some way, the issue doesn't arise as often and when it does, someone calls them on it.
But in the world of facebook it seems like it doesn't matter what you say, someone....probably someone you don't know and maybe your facebook friend barely knows....jumps to an extreme. I'm a white, female anthropologist married to a federal cop parenting two white young adult females and a Native American/Hispanic son without spanking or permissiveness, work for an African American boss and dh works for an Hispanic boss....I live my life in the 'gray zone'...and I like it that way. Extremes have no place in my world. The negativity it brings is beyond me right now. Honestly I commend you for wanting to continue a conversation after the 'everyone is going to die if you don't agree with me' bomb goes off. If I can ignore it, it try. More often than not, if I want to communicate with my facebook friend on the subject after that, I take it to PM.
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Elizabeth "Truth without love is divisive and hurtful & love without truth is anemic"--Pastor Estep Arise, cry out in the night...pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord; Lift up your hands to him for the lives of your children..; Lamentations 2:19 |
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10-05-2017, 04:51 PM | #12 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 12,309
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
You could search for a good meme that addresses this and save it to your computer/device for easy posting whenever the issue arises.
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My kiddos 26, 23, 19, 15, 12, 8, 2, <1 |
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10-05-2017, 05:14 PM | #13 |
Deactivated
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 14,962
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
I'm wondering if it's at all connected to the thirst for likes and comments. Rational,open-minded discussion doesn't get as much attention?
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10-05-2017, 08:43 PM | #14 |
Moderator
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: In green pastures
Posts: 9,754
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
"All generalizations are false." I say this often in response to comments from others but also to myself when I am being judgemental and presumptuous.
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RiverRock, mom to a 24 year old diamond, 22 year old granite, 19 year old pearl, and 16 year old tiger eye. Married for 25 years to a rugged boulder and resting together on the one true Rock.
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10-05-2017, 08:56 PM | #15 |
Rose Trellis
Deuteronomy 11:19
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,051
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Re: Rant: "extremes" and logical fallacies in discussions
Celtic Journey - I agree it is about the level of connection.
I usually can just took my eyes, laugh and either call them out or leave the conversation. I like to continue after the extremes even with people I know I'll never convince because I feel it's important to address the crazy for those who are quietly following the conversation and interested. Once they cross the line ok not doing it for the other party, but for the quiet readers. Deena - I like the meme idea a lot. Beth 1231 that's a good point it definitely could be part of the issue. RiverRock - I love that quote excellent reminder to all in the conversation. Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
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"Reflections like these lead one to spare the rod ... purely because it is not easy to find a punishment that does not defeat it's own ends." -Charlotte Mason Parents and Children pg. 171 "If punishment were necessarily reformative, and able to cure us all of those 'sins we have a mind to,' why, the world would be a very good world;" -Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children pg. 172 W&C 8/4/06; G 15yo , M 11yo , S 8/29/13 , V 8yo , Baby 2yo |
The Following User Says Thank You to SewingGreenMama For This Useful Post: | deena (10-06-2017) |
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