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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing. A public forum. Before posting here, please read this sticky and keep guideline 23 in mind:
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02-23-2010, 08:35 PM | #1 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 30,329
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Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
I have only participated in a few FB conversations about the Schatz case, but wow, people get so defensive and even offensive about it. Let's see, I have been called hateful, told I need to to read my Bible more, accused of slander, etc, etc. You would think I spoke ill of God himself or something. I'm just curious because if you criticize one of my favorite authors, I would probably disagree wholeheartedly, but I wouldn't attack you personally. Have others found this to be their experience as well?
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02-23-2010, 08:39 PM | #2 |
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AKA "Mommy Piadosa" or on FB "PunkHippyMommy"
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 14,478
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Isn't that one of the sociological signs of a cult, that followers rabidly defend their leader?
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02-23-2010, 08:40 PM | #3 |
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,517
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
I think the stakes are just so much higher for them. If they admit Pearl is wrong, they may not be able to face the consequences. They might realize they've been hitting their children in vain.
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02-23-2010, 10:02 PM | #4 |
Rose Trellis
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Whitecourt, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 2,226
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
They've been essentially brainwashed into believing their way (his way) is the right way and only way and that they must protect themselves from the world and defend the attacks of the Godless heretics...
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Patrysha Far away Mom to Boys (17), (15), (11) My personal blog - Patrysha - odds, ends & recovery Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter |
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02-23-2010, 11:00 PM | #5 |
Administrator
"air-mannah Leen-dah" it means Sister Linda in Spanish
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 51,857
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
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02-24-2010, 07:33 AM | #6 | |
Climbing Rose
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Oklahoma City
Posts: 1,249
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Quote:
I can't imagine how painful it must be to walk away from such teaching and the actions that teaching inspires/requires. It would be too devastating. (Clarifying - I haven't switched one of my babies! I am saying *if* I had. Trying to view the discussion from their point of view. Just wanted to make sure I was clear on that.)
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Megan - eNFp Advocate
Homemaking freelance writer & author passionate about gentle mothering, natural living, social justice and great coffee. Married to my college sweetheart and the SortaCrunchy mama to my big girls (8 and 5) and brand new (2/7/13) twin boys. Co-author of Spirit-Led Parenting: From Fear to Freedom in Baby's First Year |
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02-24-2010, 08:05 AM | #7 |
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Second star to the right, straight on til morning.
Posts: 6,571
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
I think they believe they ARE defending God. It's not unlike some family friends I know, some who will flip out if you don't hate homosexuals and Muslims and anyone who doesn't follow the Word as they see it.
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02-24-2010, 08:23 AM | #8 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,673
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Were all those conversations on my facebook page?
My mom is the one who made the slander comment, and the hateful one too, and she was not adressing you.. But I totally understand what you are saying.. Those threads have caused a several day.. (Maybe a week now) diologe with my mom.. I have been explaining his theology to her, and asking why people defend him sooo passionatly.. Other teachers that are heretical are not defended so fiercly.. And I am not sure why. The funny thing, is that when I read her portions of his book, and the website, she sees all of the bad theology.. But, she says she just spits out the bones. Aparently when we were growing up, MP is the one who encouraged her to act without anger, and she sees that as very valuable advice.. (Which it is) So she thinks that he has good insights, even if he goes a little off the deep end on some things. I guess I dont understand that reasoning. Yes, there are random statements of MP's that I agree with. But I do not agree with why he is saying it.. So, I really don't agree at all. He says you should have well diciplined and loving children.. I agree.. BUT his reason is a control issue.. Or to somehow make them more saveable.. Mine is because I simply want the best for my kids.. So while I might agree with a statement on paper, I do not agree with the philosophy behind the statement.. Wow.. Does that even make sense? Just for the record, my mom felt that some of the comments atacked him as a person, and not just his teachings.. Which is where the slander thing came from..
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02-24-2010, 08:41 AM | #9 |
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Proverbs are proverbial.
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,517
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
I thought of this in terms of the parable of the prodigal son today.
His older brother gets angry because his father welcomes his wayward brother home with open arms and a huge party. Since I have been, and still am like, the older brother in so many ways--always striving through my efforts to do the right thing and please God--I know how grace freely given seems to insult to my striving. I think the Pearls' teachings make parents responsible for their children's righteousness (and their own), which necessitates striving and legalism. It is threatening and insulting to hear that other Christians don't agree that all that effort is needed either for living out our faith or raising our children. |
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02-24-2010, 09:05 AM | #10 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 30,329
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
(((Jennie))) I should have chosen some different examples. I didn't feel like your mom's statements were directed at me. That kind of reaction just seems typical of his supporters. On another FB discussion, speaking against MP was called an "attack against godliness".
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02-24-2010, 09:31 AM | #11 |
Deactivated
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 16,426
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
i think it stands to reason that hostile ppl would be attracted to and more likely to implement pearl
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02-24-2010, 09:41 AM | #12 |
Rose Garden
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 10,819
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Hear me as gently and cautiously as I mean this.
Could the hostility, anger, aggressiveness, defensiveness and offensiveness be the result of the hold the Evil One has in this "ministry"? |
02-24-2010, 09:48 AM | #13 |
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"Knitting is Mama's job"
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Where the wind blows, the snow flies and mere mortals can't breathe
Posts: 6,945
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
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02-24-2010, 09:56 AM | #14 | ||
Rose Garden
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 30,329
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Quote:
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02-24-2010, 09:57 AM | #15 |
Rose Garden
Standing for gentleness and honesty
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Looking for Hope
Posts: 12,027
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Re: Why are Pearl supporters so hostile?
Yeah, I wonder why people fight so hard for the riht to hit their children. Um seriously.
And wow, Mrs.Chris, that was the MILDEST discussion I have seen on FB about spanking, etc. No one was being hateful.
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Maggi, Tw irler of the Umbrella of Silliness
Mama to two sweet littles and 3 angels 12/4/11 10/7/13 12/8/13 Grace is not a destination, it's a journey. I first learned to show grace to my child that was not shown to me, then I learned to accept it for myself, and only recently have I been able to have grace for others more. ~Sweetpeasmommy A |
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