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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
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Old 10-30-2005, 08:53 AM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 5,800
TulipMama is on a distinguished road
Default Setting Children Up to Fail

On an old discussion on my blog about the Pearls, one of my critiques of their techiniques is how they set infants and children up for failure, and then swat them for it.

This is what I've said:
"When you put an object in front of an infant knowing he will reach for it, and you spat his hand with a switch, it is a very MEASURED spat, not intended to even cause a cry. That is training."

I don't find this to be Biblical.

Instead, Michael Pearl is teaching something based on humanistic behaviourism, treating children like mice in a lab who get "shocked" to train them how to run a maze.

This is not reflective of what we see in the Bible about how we are to treat our children, our littlest disciplines.

Do you set a needle in front of a Christian brother who is a drug addict and smack his hand each time he gets a craving and reaches for it?

How absurd!

Instead, the Bible teaches that those who are stronger should help those who are weaker.

"Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Galatians 6:1-2

Now, I know you'll make the point that the baby isn't in sin--you are simply "training." However, Micheal Pearl is focusing the early infant training through "consistent" swats to be key to teaching children to obey--and that to disobey is sin. I have a very big problem, both from theological and child developmental points of view, in setting up a child or infant to sin/disobey.

Someone recently replied with some thoughts which I believe are straight from TTUAC.
As far as setting up a child to fail, look back to the very beginning at God. Is it not what God himself did with Adam and Eve? He put them in a beautiful garden with freedom to do as they please and forbid them to eat from one tree? He put that tree right there in the middle of the garden. Was God setting them up to fail?

Before I answer with what I believe, I'd like to see what thoughts y'all have on this.

TulipMama is offline   Reply With Quote


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