When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? - Page 2

Sparrow · 02-20-2015, 08:54 AM

I don't like any of the titles. I'd love to find a better term. It's an important job. My family would be hungry and dirty if I did nothing

Mother of Sons · 02-20-2015, 09:02 AM

M

Quote:

I think the change was intended to show the priority of focus. Homemaker was associated with the 1950's perfect housekeeper and 'dinner on the table at 6' myth

It wasn't a myth in our house. We lived with my gramma and she was the epitome of that kind of homemaker. We had full meals (salad, main dish, vegetable, starch, jello (usually) and a dessert (frequently) every night. The house was never messy. Occasionally my room was but she didn't let that go for long either. The floors were mopped daily when she had infants (including my brothers) snack every day after school, the only laundry like was the small one at the bottom of the chute and she washed socks by hand. her hair was done, make up on by the time my Grampa came home and she was an Avon lady too. She also gardened and sewed, knit etc. I think to us now it's about staying home with the kids and the home arts are seen as side annoyances but definitely not priorities. I think to her it was a vocation and she took it very seriously. I would really like to be more like her in that way.

ValiantJoy07 · 02-20-2015, 09:23 AM

Under occupation on my facebook I have "domestic engineer" I think it's pretty fitting.

When people ask me what I do I say "home school and keep all the people alive" that takes some skill: domestic engineer!

Soliloquy · 02-20-2015, 10:24 AM

I love both homemaker and "keeper of the home/keeper at home" although the latter is a mouthful.

A house is just a house. I lived in lots of different apartments and houses before I got married. Even when I was in between jobs or during breaks from school, I wasn't a homemaker. It was just a roof over my head and a place to keep my stuff.

For me, a homemaker ties it all together to keep the heart of the family thriving. Certainly, my husband contributes, but it is the longing of my heart that each member of my family feel warm inside when they know they are going home. "Be it ever so humble, there is no place like home."

deena · 02-20-2015, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2sunshines

I don't think (again, I may be wrong), it's very common for women to be homemakers pre-kids.

It's common for sugars daddy's.

...back to your regularly scheduled conversation.

kiloyd · 02-20-2015, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deena

It's common for sugars daddy's.

...back to your regularly scheduled conversation.

---------- Post added at 07:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:26 PM ----------

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mother of Sons

M

It wasn't a myth in our house. We lived with my gramma and she was the epitome of that kind of homemaker. We had full meals (salad, main dish, vegetable, starch, jello (usually) and a dessert (frequently) every night. The house was never messy. Occasionally my room was but she didn't let that go for long either. The floors were mopped daily when she had infants (including my brothers) snack every day after school, the only laundry like was the small one at the bottom of the chute and she washed socks by hand. her hair was done, make up on by the time my Grampa came home and she was an Avon lady too. She also gardened and sewed, knit etc. I think to us now it's about staying home with the kids and the home arts are seen as side annoyances but definitely not priorities. I think to her it was a vocation and she took it very seriously. I would really like to be more like her in that way.

I enjoyed reading that. That is the mom I want to be. Or at least close.

MrsDuck · 02-20-2015, 01:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kiloyd

---------- Post added at 07:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:26 PM ----------

I enjoyed reading that. That is the mom I want to be. Or at least close.

I enjoyed reading it, too, but it left me wondering... HOW DID SHE DOOOOO IT?? I try so hard, and fail, most every day. And then I get frustrated and go for days without even trying and everything falls apart. Is is just that we have too much? Both physical stuff in the house, and time stuff on the calendar?

I like "domestic goddess".

blondie · 02-20-2015, 01:44 PM

I love the term homemaker.

. I cant even say SAHM, about myself, it feels empty to me and in my head refers to something that I am not.

Chaos Coordinator · 02-20-2015, 01:53 PM

Homemaking arts are a bit lost at this point. I took classes in school to acquire some skill, and have gleaned some from my grandmother, my mother in law, and basic life as a mother and wife, but there's no way I could do as much as was listed in that paragraph above. I spend a lot of my day lying down exhausted and trying to figure out what to do next.

My mom was a computer engineer. I grew up on lucky charms and beanie weenie and daycare snacks (saltines. Lots of saltines). I was always fascinated by these moms who spent their days cooking and sewing and cleaning because it was so far removed from my own home experience.

I joke that I once told my mom I wanted to grow up and be a teacher and she said I wouldn't make very much money doing that, so now I homeschool instead

I really showed her!

(she is totally supportive of my life choices btw!)

Housekat · 02-20-2015, 02:18 PM

melliethepooh · 02-20-2015, 02:26 PM

I theorize that when one could boot the kids out into the neighborhood to play all day, one could accomplish gobs more domestic things...

ValiantJoy07 · 02-20-2015, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by melliethepooh

I theorize that when one could boot the kids out into the neighborhood to play all day, one could accomplish gobs more domestic things...

It's true even 20 years ago as long as a slightly older kid was out front to keep an eye on things the babies and toddlers were fine to wander the yard and neighborhood.

I remember being 8 and taking SIL who was 3 over to my house (about 2 blocks away) by myself. Or being 7 and having BIL and SIL (1 and 2) out in the driveway while MIL was inside doing stuff. It wasn't a busy street at all and I kept an eye on them.

It was even more lax 50 years ago. Even in other countries they are so much more laid back. I had a friend from well not eastern Europe But east of Italy

who had CPS threatened on her because she'd let the kids do stuff American Mother's wouldn't dream of allowing. And when you stepped back it really wasn't that bad.

My Mom cooked every thing from scratch for 7 people, homeschooled 5 kids, and sewed and knitted like crazy- becasue she enjoyed it. She was alwasy cleaning- but she had key areas that she cared about and kept on top of but things like dishes were always a disaster.

you CAN'T do it all, all the time...But you can pick the things you care about and do them well.

Mother of Sons · 02-20-2015, 03:14 PM

My gramma definitely believed in outside time for kids. We were outside playing nearly every day. My Grampa built us a skating rink in the back yard which gave us something to do in the winter. My gramma kept us busy but she didn't entertain us. She often had some kind of craft for us to do. She wasn't trying to just get rid of us though. She didn't like for me to stay in my room and read. She always wanted us playing. If you dared say you were bored you got chores.

Our neighbor did tell me once that she doesn't understand mothers these days that let their toddlers run free. She made lots of use of a playpen. Toys would not have been strewn around the house because toddlers didn't play that way. Not sure if my gramma used one but it wouldn't surprise me.

mellifera · 02-20-2015, 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrsDuck

I enjoyed reading it, too, but it left me wondering... HOW DID SHE DOOOOO IT??

She didn't have internet.

Tasmanian Saint · 02-20-2015, 04:05 PM

I asked dh if he preferred homemaker or sahd. He said, " well I'm not a builder or carpenter... "

. So I read him the definition of home maker from that article but he still wasn't interested in being called a homemaker

(he isn't currently a sahd, but wet both share the work and parenting atm, and he has been sahd in the past)

My fb page says I'm "personal assistant and trainer" to ds1

(never got around to adding the others)

02-20-2015, 08:54 AM	#16
Sparrow Rose Garden Immerse your soul in love. Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Victoria, BC Posts: 17,611	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? I don't like any of the titles. I'd love to find a better term. It's an important job. My family would be hungry and dirty if I did nothing __________________ Manda Mama to: Bear 16.75 Funny and Tender. Larger than life. ENFP Max 14 Affectionate and Spirited. Artist Chickadee 8! She's Sunshine and Song. Born in the caul We have a fur baby. A cat called Charlie

02-20-2015, 09:23 AM	#18
ValiantJoy07 Rose Garden "Take Joy Home, And make a place in thy great heart for her...Joy is the grace we say to God." ~Jean Ingelow~ Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: The Forest Posts: 16,337	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? Under occupation on my facebook I have "domestic engineer" I think it's pretty fitting. When people ask me what I do I say "home school and keep all the people alive" that takes some skill: domestic engineer! __________________ Hannah Joy Intuitive People Loving Introvert Married since '05 to Ryan software and web applications developer. Homeschooling Mama to my 5 Joys... dd1 RJ (12/07), dd2 AJ (08/09), dd3 PJ (01/12), ds1 Ziggy (09/15), ds2 Sunny (05/18) Enjoying a Healing Diet to manage SPD and other health challenges. Sorry for the typos and sloppy grammar I don't have a good excuse anymore.

02-20-2015, 10:24 AM	#19
Soliloquy Rose Garden Why climb a mountain? Because it's there! Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Selkirk Mountains Posts: 52,860	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? I love both homemaker and "keeper of the home/keeper at home" although the latter is a mouthful. A house is just a house. I lived in lots of different apartments and houses before I got married. Even when I was in between jobs or during breaks from school, I wasn't a homemaker. It was just a roof over my head and a place to keep my stuff. For me, a homemaker ties it all together to keep the heart of the family thriving. Certainly, my husband contributes, but it is the longing of my heart that each member of my family feel warm inside when they know they are going home. "Be it ever so humble, there is no place like home."

02-20-2015, 01:44 PM	#23
blondie Rose Garden A little bit crunchy, a little bit rock n' roll! Join Date: May 2011 Posts: 10,298	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? I love the term homemaker. . I cant even say SAHM, about myself, it feels empty to me and in my head refers to something that I am not. __________________ homeschooling mama to four dear ones Lilla Rose Stylist

02-20-2015, 01:53 PM	#24
Chaos Coordinator Rose Garden They need freedom to just be fluffy mashed potatoes and feel their fluffy feelings. Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Up to my earballs in little boys. Posts: 20,259	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? Homemaking arts are a bit lost at this point. I took classes in school to acquire some skill, and have gleaned some from my grandmother, my mother in law, and basic life as a mother and wife, but there's no way I could do as much as was listed in that paragraph above. I spend a lot of my day lying down exhausted and trying to figure out what to do next. My mom was a computer engineer. I grew up on lucky charms and beanie weenie and daycare snacks (saltines. Lots of saltines). I was always fascinated by these moms who spent their days cooking and sewing and cleaning because it was so far removed from my own home experience. I joke that I once told my mom I wanted to grow up and be a teacher and she said I wouldn't make very much money doing that, so now I homeschool instead I really showed her! (she is totally supportive of my life choices btw!) __________________ Joy Progressive Methodist Enfp mama to Sparrow, 10 Zion, 7.5 Baby Gus, 4.5 Preschool teacher. Musician. Timelord. Www.justicemercymayhem.wordpress.com "What you plant in the kingdom will surely grow, and what you grow with love will surely bloom, and the fruit of the spirit will come back to you."

02-20-2015, 02:18 PM	#25
Housekat Rose Garden Even if you can't see them or hear them at all, a person's a person, no matter how small! Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Wakefield, UK Posts: 4,895	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? __________________ Mama to Theo (11) and Libby (9) Find me on Facebook

02-20-2015, 02:26 PM	#26
melliethepooh Rose Garden Dinosaurs are people too Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 5,981	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? I theorize that when one could boot the kids out into the neighborhood to play all day, one could accomplish gobs more domestic things... __________________ Melinda, INTJ Married to Mr since 12/06 ENTP Mama to all the babies, 1/09 ISTJ and 11/11 ExxP and 5/14 ExxP and NEW ONE 8/16

02-20-2015, 03:14 PM	#28
Mother of Sons Rose Garden My kid shoots laser beams from his hands Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 21,900	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? My gramma definitely believed in outside time for kids. We were outside playing nearly every day. My Grampa built us a skating rink in the back yard which gave us something to do in the winter. My gramma kept us busy but she didn't entertain us. She often had some kind of craft for us to do. She wasn't trying to just get rid of us though. She didn't like for me to stay in my room and read. She always wanted us playing. If you dared say you were bored you got chores. Our neighbor did tell me once that she doesn't understand mothers these days that let their toddlers run free. She made lots of use of a playpen. Toys would not have been strewn around the house because toddlers didn't play that way. Not sure if my gramma used one but it wouldn't surprise me.

02-20-2015, 04:05 PM	#30
Tasmanian Saint Rose Trellis Go Team Lioness! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: This side of the black stump Posts: 2,428	Re: When did homemaker change to stay-at-home-mom? I asked dh if he preferred homemaker or sahd. He said, " well I'm not a builder or carpenter... " . So I read him the definition of home maker from that article but he still wasn't interested in being called a homemaker (he isn't currently a sahd, but wet both share the work and parenting atm, and he has been sahd in the past) My fb page says I'm "personal assistant and trainer" to ds1 (never got around to adding the others) __________________ Our blossoms: DS "Little Bear" Apr '07 - The negotiator DD "Miss Muffett" Nov '08 "Don't tell Daddy..." DS "Mouse" Jan '12 "I Soup Baby, Man of steel! " Myth Busting over at Dare to Disciple "Believe in yourself. Trust your instincts. Unless your instincts are terrible." Vitruvius, The LEGO Movie.

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