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Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
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23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

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Old 06-16-2017, 10:54 PM   #1
Soliloquy
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Unhappy Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

I'm sitting on my hands. I desperately want to reply with ezzo.info but I don't engage on Facebook.
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Old 06-16-2017, 11:21 PM   #2
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

Sounds so frustrating! Can you unfollow or block temporarily?
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Old 06-17-2017, 07:09 AM   #3
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

I have trouble with that, too. On the one hand, you might convince someone who is on the fence (probably not the poster, but someone reading). On the other hand, those things get so ugly so fast! I'd be tempted just to post ezzo.info, then unfollow the post. But I really do hate facebook fights and I regret entering them when I do.
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Old 06-17-2017, 07:36 AM   #4
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

The only thing I address on FB is poor car seat use (I cannot keep quiet!), but I do it through private messaging.


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Old 06-17-2017, 07:43 AM   #5
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

A new mom friend asked about Babywise, so I dropped the link and then unfollowed the conversation. It was too hard to not engage further!! Argh.

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Old 06-17-2017, 10:01 AM   #6
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

It was just a meme and the meme itself wasn't bad ... But it was from the ezzo's new book or site or whatever they have, I don't even know, Beyond Babywise or something. I just want her to know not to be fooled by them. I'm not close with her and it's not a conversation I want to have online.

Maybe in a few weeks I'll post ezzo.info on my page.
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Old 06-17-2017, 10:45 AM   #7
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

I had a really hard time with this recently. On a local yardsale group, someone posted a stack of fostering/adoption books they wanted to give away. There were several great books on attachment, trauma, etc.... and SACH. Probably the only thing that kept me from saying something was that a friend of mine runs the group.
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Old 06-17-2017, 03:20 PM   #8
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Grey View Post
I had a really hard time with this recently. On a local yardsale group, someone posted a stack of fostering/adoption books they wanted to give away. There were several great books on attachment, trauma, etc.... and SACH. Probably the only thing that kept me from saying something was that a friend of mine runs the group.
I always grab up copies of SACH, Ezzo, Dr. Denmark, etc. in situations like that. Then I dispose of them properly.

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Old 06-17-2017, 06:34 PM   #9
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

I thought about it but it was in the middle of our health issues back in March and there was just no time/energy.
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Old 06-17-2017, 06:40 PM   #10
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

Quote:
Originally Posted by twentysixcats View Post
I always grab up copies of SACH, Ezzo, Dr. Denmark, etc. in situations like that. Then I dispose of them properly.

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I do that, too. I don't see much of the super toxic stuff like SACH here (it's just not as popular) but I do see Ezzo and I also will buy it and dispose of it properly.
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Old 06-17-2017, 11:27 PM   #11
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

Quote:
Originally Posted by twentysixcats View Post
I always grab up copies of SACH, Ezzo, Dr. Denmark, etc. in situations like that. Then I dispose of them properly.

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Who is Dr. Denmark?
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Old 06-20-2017, 08:32 PM   #12
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

This church I mentioned that loved Dr. Denmark has a very well known singer who is the worship leader. She had her first baby a few years ago and she posted on FB something about "Why is it that the baby sleeps all day except from 10pm to 6am?" She was just trying to be lighthearted (and didn't say anything to indicate she was letting baby CIO or withhold nursing), but I knew from that comment that they'd gotten her with the Dr. Denmark schedule. It broke my heart. I decided not to engage with that comment on FB for my own sanity but .

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Old 06-21-2017, 10:28 AM   #13
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

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Old 06-21-2017, 10:38 AM   #14
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Default Re: Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook. Don't engage on Facebook.

I wonder if there is an ethical way to conduct studies on kids whose parents did this kind of thing to them and one on kids whose parents did not and see just what and how profound the short and long term effects of CIO and the like really is. I know cortisol and other hormones have been measured, but I wonder if there is a way to show what else is happening and will continue to happen to those babies. It seems to me that if we can just show how hard this is on them, that parents would abandon these things in a heartbeat.
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