2 or 3? Trying to decide

[rcsmom]

Ok ladies I need some people to talk to about this decision that do not have a vested interest in it
We have two beautiful little boys right now. DS1 is almost 5 and DS2 will be 2 in a couple of months. DS1 is a handful- very intense, high energy, dramatic. He is the reason I am on here and read every good parenting book I can get my hands on DS2 is much more laid back, easy going but still very high energy. They are amazing boys
So we are thinking about trying for another one come this spring. My DH says that he would be happy with two but if I want another one he is fine with that too. However I know that he would rather stay at two mainly because he feels like my pregnancies have been stressful. With DS1 I developed mild pre-e at 40+ weeks, went in to be induced, spent 4 days in the hospital trying to be induced, never got past 3 cm and ended up with a C-section. With DS2 I wanted a VBAC but started to develop high blood pressure (no pre-e) at 34 weeks, was put on meds that controlled it pretty well up until about 39 weeks when my blood pressure spiked to 185/115 which prompted a pretty stressful drive to the hospital and a C-section at 10pm that night. Anyway both of my births have been very stressful and scary for DH. He is worried that if I became pregnant again it would be worse. However I have lost a bunch of weight since DS2 came (which should help the high blood pressure) and should for the first time in my life be at a "normal" weight before we conceive this time. I also plan on having him go to the doctor with me before we conceive to talk to the doctor about his concerns. I think that should help him.
I am also getting opinions (not necessarily wanted) from other people too. My mom is VERY against us having three because she was one of three girls and she felt like she was always the odd man out. So she thinks we should stop at two or have four.
I would really like to have another one- I don't feel "done". However I am worried about having the time and energy to take care of three. I have pretty high standards for myself and just manage to hit them now. I know that both of the boys will be older when the baby is born but I worry about being able to give everyone the time and attention that they need. I am also going to be starting to homeschool DS1 the year after the baby would be born. I just worry about being overwhelmed. I don't know how you ladies with big families do it.
So those with three do you find that you have an "odd man out"? Anyone else have similar health issues and have three? Someone please reassure me that having three isn't that bad