Unprepared for Parenting (Ezzos, Pearls, Etc.) *Public*Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing. A public forum. Before posting here, please read this sticky and keep guideline 23 in mind:
23. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.
She surprisingly is not pro-dresses only or only long hair, pointing out there are women who do it for appearances, but are very un-Christian in actions. Also to her credit, she also stresses that if there is abuse (physical, s3xual, abuse of a child), or if the husband is asking the wife to do something illegal in the name of submission, to call the authorities and get out of the situation.
But apparently "get out" does not mean get yourself away from the situation, rather it means to get your husband out of the house and then wait for him to come back. From their website:
Quote:
But if your husband has sexually molested the children, you should approach him with it. If he is willing to seek counseling and repent, then fine and good. If not, then go to the law and have him arrested. Stick by him, but testify against him in court. Have him do about 10 to 20 years, and by the time he gets out, you will have raised the kids, and you can be waiting for him with open arms of forgiveness and restitution. Will this glorify God? Forever. You ask, "What if he doesn’t repent even then?" Then you will be rewarded in heaven equal to the martyrs, and God will have something to rub in the Devil’s face. God hates divorce—always, forever, regardless, without exception.
Seek counseling and forgive and forget? Welcome a man back into your bed who likes to have sex with your daughters??? Uh-uh - I don't think so. That's insanity. I would venture to guess that God considers it a pretty high priority to protect our children from rapists and molestors.
Great points. Plus again she contradicts herself once again by stating that the wife will have raised the kids by herself -- meaning that the husband is not around to do the job. Her teachings state that the MAN needs to be there to direct/oversee everything.
Goes to the point that life does not work out in nice little compartments like the Pearls would like it to, with their pre-defined roles carried out by the appropriate people as defined by them (through their interpretation of Scripture).
Yes, a woman should forgive her husband for such unthinkable sins, but no where in Scripture does it say that she needs to continue to put up with it. And Jesus talks about those who wish to harm children like this: "It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves." (Luke 17:2-3a)
But my earlier point was that she does not say to put up with the abuse, saying that it's somehow the wife's fault anyway; rather, she says to call the authorities and testify. So that is what I meant when I put it in my positive column. (There are some very extreme people out there who do say a wife should stay with an abuser because it is somehow her fault the abuse is happening. ) I don't agree that the wife is required to take her husband back -- that needs to be a very prayerful decision made between her and the Lord.
*Public* Support and information for those affected by the Ezzos, the Pearls, and other punitive and adversarial methods of child-rearing.
08-10-2005, 09:11 AM
Re: Created To Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl
So that is what I meant when I put it in my positive column. (There are some very extreme people out there who do say a wife should stay with an abuser because it is somehow her fault the abuse is happening. 
) I don't agree that the wife is required to take her husband back -- that needs to be a very prayerful decision made between her and the Lord.
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Uh-uh - I don't think so. That's insanity. I would venture to guess that God considers it a pretty high priority to protect our children from rapists and molestors.
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