Please read this before perusing or posting in this forum

[flowermama]

Welcome!

The Unprepared for Parenting* forum offers support and information for those affected by the punitive and adversarial parenting methods taught by Gary Ezzo, the Pearls, James Dobson, Tedd Tripp, and other punitive parenting gurus.

When posting here please remember this is a public forum, and we have the opportunity in this forum to minister not only to our members, but to those just reading as well. Please be mindful that parents still caught in the paradigm of punitive parenting are reading our words. Also, there are many mothers who are members of this site who used to parent in these ways, as well as others who are trying to break away. None of us are better than any other mother -- we all are in need of God's grace. Prayerfully our words will offer grace and hope to all who read here, including those who may still be caught in a punitive parenting paradigm.

Those who are leaving behind adversarial parenting methods may express strong feelings about these things. It can be difficult and scary when we begin to realize that some of our mistakes have harmed our children. Please be gentle and patient with everyone here whether they have done attachment parenting from the start, are just leaving behind detached methods of parenting, or are still looking into gentle discipline and attachment parenting.

We encourage you to post in this forum. . .

. . . for support when you've been personally affected by such programs.

. . . for help to better understand the Biblical concerns with these punitive and adversarial approaches to parenting.

. . . for help to be able to better share information with churches and friends who misguidedly believe the Bible supports parenting programs such as those advocated by Gary Ezzo and the Pearls.

. . . to share analyses and chapter-by-chapter reviews of books by punitive authors. Please avoid straw-man bashing, such as the way Gary Ezzo bashes a made-up version of attachment parenting. We want to avoid doing the same thing in reverse.

. . . to share links to a book or book review. However, do not link to or target Christian discussion boards or blogs where punitive mothers go for support.

If you have practical discipline questions, please post them in our Gentle Discipline forum. It's important to partner learning new tools with getting rid of the old. You will find a wealth of ideas and encouragement there.

I Peter 2:1-3 offers a good guideline:

"Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good."

When posting in this forum, please keep in mind the following specific rule from our Posting Guidelines and Rules:

22. No posts harshly dissecting parenting moments of others since we desire to humbly cultivate a heart attitude of grace and not judgment towards other mamas. We all struggle at times as parents and have much to learn, and GCM's focus is to provide tools and information for each of us to parent more effectively. Posts voicing some frustration regarding choices made by others can be okay, but it needs to be within the overall context of seeking understanding or ideas for better responses in the future.

* The name of this forum -- Unprepared for Parenting -- is a reference to the Ezzos' church-based parenting program for infants that used to be entitled "Preparation for Parenting." For more information about how their titles' names have changed please see http://www.ezzo.info/parent.htm .

[Maggirayne]

The link to the Gentle Discipline forum doesn't work.

[Hermana Linda]

[graciousmomma]

Originally Posted by Hermana Linda

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[Hermana Linda]

Someone allowed little fingers alone with the keyboard.

[newday]

Originally Posted by graciousmomma

jhfhfhhfhfhehjhfhhfgggyrgrgfrerkjuy7recvdhcfvvdbgv dbvf vnb bhhvrt bgfgavzxpiihkgfnffnnf fbfbeb tty5yb b gry4 hth hr y55yh y5y

[graciousmomma]

Originally Posted by Hermana Linda

Someone allowed little fingers alone with the keyboard.

I apologize, I have 4 kids, one of whom is a newborn - so I have a few distractions sometimes, and my newly 6 yo is fast - she has been randomly posting across GCM. She is one of those kids who doesn't stay in one place for too long, so I don't always catch it when she does it. We are working on it

[Hermana Linda]

No apologies necessary. I should have phrased that better. I only posted it because sometimes someone wonders what is up. We all get quite a kick out of it.

[hammys88]

thanks!