Gentle Christian Mothers Community
 
Random Quotes from Wise Mamas


Go Back   Gentle Christian Mothers Community > Mothering Thru the Years > Nurturing our Children (AP & Multi-age Parenting Topics) *Public* > Co-Sleeping & Nighttime Parenting *Public*
Forgot Password? Join Us!

Notices

Co-Sleeping & Nighttime Parenting *Public* A public forum.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-12-2012, 01:17 PM   #1
WildFlower
Banned
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: indiana
Posts: 4,413
WildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond reputeWildFlower has a reputation beyond repute
Default helping them learn to go to sleep

Is there a way or does anyone have any ideas on helping teach a toddler how to settle down to go to sleep ? I honestly don't really expect to get very many ideas or much help because it seems like everyone here is faced with this dilemna and just waits till their child grows out of it. I don't have a problem helping my DD go to sleep but I think helping her learn to settle down to sleep would really help improve her sleep and help make nighweaning later easier. If there is a better way to think about this please help me.

DD used to nurse to sleep all the time. Now she really rarely does unless she's really tired. She'll nurse for a bit and still finds nursing calming but it doesn't put her to sleep like it used to. I end up carrying her on my back till she falls asleep and then laying her down, at which point she'll wake up a little and want to nurse then settle down. At bedtime she'll nurse a little and we'll rock but then I'll lay in bed with her and she'll flip flop and nurse till she finally gets tired enough to go to sleep. Usually she is flip flopping so much I have to hold her down for a few seconds and say "It's time to go to sleep" She'll cry a bit and I stop holding her down (it's gentle) and then she'll nurse some more and stay still and go to sleep.

I would really like to attempt nightweaning before she's 2 but I think she'd have an easier time with it if she already knows how to settle down to go to sleep without nursing at all and without having to be carried in beco. I don't mind laying down with her, snuggling, shushing/patting. But she is just so hard to settle. She wants to pop up and play. During the day , there is no stopping her till I get her in the carrier (or car) and then she'll be out in 10 minutes.

Any ideas? Is there a better way to think about this?
WildFlower is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 01:26 PM   #2
MomtoJGJ
Deactivated
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 11,793
MomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond reputeMomtoJGJ has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

My first was an awful sleeper, so for survival I just didn't try anything I just slept with her when she slept, or slept when she destroyed something

My second was awesome, and never wanted help falling alseep... from birth.

Now what I did with my 3rd and 4th, who are my best sleepers... I'm not sure if it really is just their personalities, or what I did, but if it works! Anywhere it says nursing that is DD4... DD3 didn't really care for nursing for comfort from early on.

I would start out laying in their bed nursing them to sleep, then I would do the thing where I'd start nursing them, and then have them come off while I would lay with them. If it didn't work we'd do it again... Once that worked consistently, I would sit beside their bed after they nursed a while (in a chair). Then I would start reading outloud while sitting in the chair (instead of halfway leaning over the bed) and holding their hand or something. Then I didn't touch them at all while I was reading. Then I moved farther away from their bed. This would take a while, but I started when they were right at a year old, and I took a LONG time in between stages. It went much faster with DD3 who didn't want to nurse because *I* was more comfortable moving farther away faster with her. I took longer with Evie because she seemed to need me closer. It took about 6-8 months for me to get to where I could be anywhere in the room for Evie to stay in her bed and fall asleep.
MomtoJGJ is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to MomtoJGJ For This Useful Post:
Dandelion (05-14-2012)
Old 05-12-2012, 02:29 PM   #3
mamacat
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 20,979
mamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond reputemamacat has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

seems like her cue she is giving you is the motion - it helps her to settle down by being worn and carried or car ride so maybe finding an oversized rocker where the 2 of you can sit together and rock her right now or a porch wing and wait a bit on getting her to go to sleep on her own while still - she is only 2.That will take the nursing to sleep and having to walk with her requirements out of the routine but still give her that motion she seems to really need right now for her body to relax
__________________
~Catherine~

Mama to 5:

C
W
C
J
S
And Grandma to 3:

A ,K and baby C
mamacat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 02:46 PM   #4
EnglishRose
Climbing Rose
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 1,214
EnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

i too would really like to know the answer
__________________
Happy mother to: DD- My Sunshine - Jan 2007
DS- My little pudding - July 2010
EnglishRose is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-13-2012, 09:08 PM   #5
staceylayne
Rose Garden
 
Hopeful.
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Dallas (ish)
Posts: 3,527
staceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond reputestaceylayne has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

I was getting on here to post a similar question, but with a much more angst-filled, vent-y post. A few details and some whining in the spoiler.



So, in summary:
__________________
Married in 2003 to my favorite person in the wide world

Joyful momma to:


B - 7.5, my pensive planner
D - 5.5, my spunky sunshine
C - 3.5, my cuddly cutie

And baby girl A, born April 28!
Why, yes, I am ENFP


But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. James 3:17-18
staceylayne is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says they are praying for staceylayne:
Dovenoir (05-13-2012)
Old 05-13-2012, 09:21 PM   #6
Blue-EyedLady
Rose Garden
 
Three of a kind!
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Northern Arizona
Posts: 10,307
Blue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep



Me too, me too. I've been working on introducing a lovey for months now (because, you know, the books all say that it helps). Today I thought I'd try cuddling in bed with the lovey myself, modeling how to cuddle the lovey while laying down and closing my eyes. Baby was bemused for a few minutes, then pulled the lovey out of my arms, threw it across the bed and tried to lift up my shirt.

He knows perfectly well that he's tired, and wants to lay down, but he WON'T sleep without nursing/wearing/car ride/gently pinning down/all of the above.
__________________
Proud Purveyor of Perspicacious Practicality

Mama to The Engineer (6.5 yo) "When I grow up, I'm going to build Highway 100!" ... Mr. Mischief (3.5 yo) "I a builder too!" ... and introducing Lion Cub "Thumb sucking mastered. Commence world take-over in 3, 2, 1..." (June 2014)

Sister to BlessedBlue forever

Co-Founder and Lead Writer at Food Allergies On Ice

Blue-EyedLady is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-13-2012, 09:22 PM   #7
Dovenoir
Rose Garden
 
Dove - noir
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Cincy, OH
Posts: 5,002
Dovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond reputeDovenoir has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep



I'm dealing with this with DS and C..
Dovenoir is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 09:33 PM   #8
Doc
Rosebud
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Queensland, Australia
Posts: 85
Doc is a glorious beacon of lightDoc is a glorious beacon of lightDoc is a glorious beacon of lightDoc is a glorious beacon of lightDoc is a glorious beacon of lightDoc is a glorious beacon of light
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

Can I join this club too? Sigh. DD is now asking to go to bed when
she is tired, but still really struggles to get to sleep without a boob or a bit of rocking. She really tries to sleep, but just as she's nodding off she will thrash herself awake and roll around the bed. Now wondering if the Moro reflex can last into the second year...

PS why hasn't anyone invented a totally safe, non habit forming 'drug' for baby sleep? Something that teaches them how to relax and stay asleep. People would mortgage their houses for it ;-)
__________________
Mama to my beautiful DD (23/2/11) and new DS!!! (24/7/14)
Loving our angel baby Winnie Elizabeth (25/9/13)
Doc is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Doc For This Useful Post:
Elspeth (12-09-2012)
Old 05-16-2012, 09:47 PM   #9
Blue-EyedLady
Rose Garden
 
Three of a kind!
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Northern Arizona
Posts: 10,307
Blue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

I meant to bump this thread today, as sleep seems to be getting progressively worse at our house...
__________________
Proud Purveyor of Perspicacious Practicality

Mama to The Engineer (6.5 yo) "When I grow up, I'm going to build Highway 100!" ... Mr. Mischief (3.5 yo) "I a builder too!" ... and introducing Lion Cub "Thumb sucking mastered. Commence world take-over in 3, 2, 1..." (June 2014)

Sister to BlessedBlue forever

Co-Founder and Lead Writer at Food Allergies On Ice

Blue-EyedLady is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-17-2012, 12:27 PM   #10
EnglishRose
Climbing Rose
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 1,214
EnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond reputeEnglishRose has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

So er, we all agree we neeeeeed HEEEEELLLLLP.

Anyone?
__________________
Happy mother to: DD- My Sunshine - Jan 2007
DS- My little pudding - July 2010
EnglishRose is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-17-2012, 12:44 PM   #11
Blue-EyedLady
Rose Garden
 
Three of a kind!
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Northern Arizona
Posts: 10,307
Blue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond reputeBlue-EyedLady has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: helping them learn to go to sleep

I've been rereading the no_cry sleep solution, and I can't figure out what I'm supposed to do with my older child while doing all this stuff with the baby. so while I spend hours parenting baby to sleep, meanwhile my older child is screaming in my face because I'm not paying 1000% of my attention to him. It's not exactly helping baby learn to sleep.
__________________
Proud Purveyor of Perspicacious Practicality

Mama to The Engineer (6.5 yo) "When I grow up, I'm going to build Highway 100!" ... Mr. Mischief (3.5 yo) "I a builder too!" ... and introducing Lion Cub "Thumb sucking mastered. Commence world take-over in 3, 2, 1..." (June 2014)

Sister to BlessedBlue forever

Co-Founder and Lead Writer at Food Allergies On Ice

Blue-EyedLady is online now   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Blue-EyedLady For This Useful Post:
Elspeth (12-09-2012)
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:48 PM.


A variety of opinions and ideas are shared on GCM. Personal experiences, suggestions, and tips found here are in no way intended to substitute for medical counsel from a healthcare professional. Always use your own good judgement and seek professional advice when in doubt about a health concern.

Amazon.com affiliate link

Copyright 1997-2014 by Gentle Christian Mothers™
An alternative-minded, evangelical Christian community supporting attachment parenting and natural living.

Do not post content elsewhere.
http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/

Some smilies created and copyrighted by Mazeguy.
Some smilies and avatars created and copyrighted by flowermama and children -- do not use elsewhere.

Soli Deo Gloria
To God only wise, be glory through Jesus Christ for ever. Amen. ~ Romans 16:27 (KJV)

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.