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Old 07-27-2019, 07:25 PM   #30
Quiteria
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Default Re: The ADHD stay at home mom

Another thing I embraced is FlyLady's idea that doing a mediocre job frequently adds up to more than all-or-nothing infrequently. She gives the example of taking a quick swish or swipe at your toilet and countertops daily, rather than sterilizing them once in a blue moon when they get gross...even if that swipe is half-hearted and imperfect, it will be cleaner overall than waiting for you to scour every inch perfectly.

That concept in turn helped me embrace the truth that although I can sit and clean one spot all the way thoroughly in the right hyperfocus mood, I often need more movement and variety. I often clean more total if I flit around doing a little of this and that, sort of like "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie," as long as I make sure my movements are helping in some way, finished enough to not make worse. Like if I decide to clean a bedroom, and find a cup, a school paper, and a sock...it's okay for me to carry those to the appropriate places and even wash a couple dishes before coming back, as long as I drop the school paper off at the bookcase, not the kitchen counter. Little things like trying to pick up one more item on the way, seeing if anything needs carried up or downstairs while en route, clean one more thing while nearby...it adds up. If I am feeling restless and end up with half a load of dishes, half a load of laundry, and half the recycling, etc....that's still a total of 1.5 loads I wouldn't have in the right place if I hadn't tried. Yes, at some point each task needs to be finished...if we need the dishes asap, than those need some focus, and then I can flit about while the dishwasher is running...but when there's some leeway, and the focus isn't there, or the time isn't there to see something to conclusion, every little bit adds up better than inertia. If I fold 1/3 of a clean laundry load and put it away, so that it can't get spilled and undone, that's better than not starting folding. So, esp. with a toddler around, sometimes I would fold a handful, go deliver it, fold some more, go deliver it, etc. Though with big enough kids, I often call them to get their stuff now.

Anyhow, I hope that makes sense. I get more done in total when I embrace that I'm chipping away in my own manner, rather than berating myself for not working in a linear fashion. If I feel myself slowing down because I've been sitting in one place too long, it's OKAY to switch tasks. I'm more likely to cycle back to it quickly if I'm not wallowing in guilt over it. Urgent things get done urgently, non-urgent things get done in pieces, with enough variety to keep them happening more briskly than otherwise.
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Homeschooling mama to five:
a young adult (graduated!), two high schoolers, a big kid, and a kindergartner

And yes, they've all aged overnight since the last time you read my out-of-date sigg.

Last edited by Quiteria; 07-27-2019 at 07:33 PM.
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