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Old 05-09-2012, 08:41 PM   #15
DavidKelleyMay18
Rose Trellis
 
 
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Default Re: DH slapped ds last night!

Well my 7 yr. old has been doing great for a few reasons I believe. This week instead of saying Jacob I told you put the puppy down or I told you to ask permission to hold the puppy I have tried a different approach. If he picks up the puppy and she growls I say what is the puppy trying to tell you. He'll now say that she wants to be put down. Even earlier today I saw him do it on his own, and I told him that was a great job that he did!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaClara View Post

And your DH has come a far way from when you first started posting. It really is a total shift in thinking, so it really isn't as simple as telling him and having him jump right in with all the right things. So many times, all our spouses hear is, "No smacking, no shaming, now go get 'em, tiger!" I've had to model a skajillion times to my DH that we state a goal, and then we make it happen. My DH is finding that it's very tricky to view discipline as teaching, much like a math concept, just because he has a lot of things to unlearn, in terms of how he has previously seen children responded to. It's a continuum, and he'll get there! probably not exactly how you imagine, but a balance can be worked out.
This dog (pup) isn't big. She's only 9 lbs and is a Parm/(not sure exactly) but a small dog she'll be. There will be times he's basically on top of the dog, so I feel the need to teach him which I feel like I'm doing now instead of telling him.

Thank-you for noticing about my DH coming a long way! That makes me feel good..really! I finally feel a little closer to him. I never got when I would hear someone say that they married their best friend. I'm not all the way there, but I see it and understand those words now. My husband is an engineer so I think he doesn't understand it. But talking with him about it what I've tried helps better than do this or do that. Who wants to be told what to do anyways. I'm getting there too I guess. We can only try to always do better right!!

Kelley
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Little Forest (05-11-2012)
 
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