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Old 05-21-2018, 07:41 AM   #1
rainangel85
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Join Date: Sep 2012
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Default Unreasonable expectations for CRAZY 6 year old?

Hi ladies. I really need some wise input. I have no one to turn to. THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR READING THIS!

I've decided (again) to do a parenting makeover. NO yelling, etc, which is what I had reverted to. How much I should expect from my antsi 6-year-girl? When she is talked to by a parent, she blinks her eyes incessantly, stamps her foot repeatedly, suddenly yells or throws herself over, or makes the weirdest screwed up faces, etc. She keeps doing a variety of these while she "tries" to listen. It's so weird I considered Aspergers since she likes repetitive stuff, but she doesn't qualify in other ways, and she does NOT act this way at school.

I've figured out that if we practice directly she can contain the crazies. (I count to 10 or 30 while she keeps herself calm and she CAN but only with GREAT CONCENTRATION). At school she sits still fine all of the time. At home she CAN NOT sit normally or still in her chair for more than 30 seconds. We've been correcting her--only when irritated--since she was four but maybe I haven't drawn a consistent/hard line?

I feel like the problem may be that we've let bad habits continue for too long, so I've been taking a no-tolerance approach with her. (If I talk to her, she HAS to remain still and not do all the weird stuff. I'll say the thing repeatedly until she can listen without acting crazy and she'll redo her response until she can say it with a normal voice and body.) This is very hard for her right now. I'm afraid it is too hard for her, but I also feel like she *CAN* do it, and she won't be able to do it unless we draw a firm line and are ALWAYS consistent.

But I worry her strange body movements is to cover up anxiety because of past harsh parenting. She often tries to literally hide herself when corrected, even now after I've stopped yelling. Her body movements/wierd voices/laughing may be an attempt to dissociate? When she feels anxious or scared she tries to hold her breath or she burst out laughing (in the LOUDEST most obnoxious deep voice). She cannot handle disappointment/things not going her way. She can't handle her emotions. What if my no-tolerance approach to teach her "normal" responses does more damage? REALLY need some Wise Mama help for my active daughter!!!

Last edited by rainangel85; 05-21-2018 at 07:50 AM.
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