View Single Post
Old 03-20-2005, 05:40 AM   #12
mrsramjet
Guest
 
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Which Punitive Parenting Ideas Influenced You?

my 'other' is kind of punitive in some respects and not in others.
the boundary books.
i didn't realize how much i was influenced by them until i started re reading them recently.
i learnt a lot about 'empathy' as a tool from their books and they are not pro spanking. also they say with balancing grace and truth that when in doubt go with grace. this is all good.
BUT they continually say things like 'part of your little angel's make up is a criminal mind. he thinks he's powerful enough to avoid the results of his actions.'
'consequences transfer the need to be responsible from the parent to the child'
'it's scary how our kids can sense when we are weak and ready to give in to them.
.......
kids' work us and work us and work us.'
stuff like that.

so i think that they rely too much on consequences and rewards,
but are not really punitive.
more adversarial.

ps - i do like the idea that reality teaches us and that if you go nuts the problem the kid has is not his behaviour, but his crazy mother. lol.
sorry if all this wasn't appropriate to this thread.
  Reply With Quote
 
X vBulletin 3.8.3 Debug Information
  • Page Generation 0.27501 seconds
  • Memory Usage 6,915KB
  • Queries Executed 14 (?)
More Information
Template Usage:
  • (1)SHOWTHREAD_SHOWPOST
  • (1)ad_footer_end
  • (1)ad_footer_start
  • (1)ad_header_end
  • (1)ad_header_logo
  • (1)ad_navbar_below
  • (1)cyb_flashimagebanners
  • (1)footer
  • (1)gobutton
  • (1)header
  • (1)headinclude
  • (19)option
  • (1)post_groan_box
  • (1)post_groan_javascript
  • (1)post_groan_navbar_search
  • (1)post_thanks_box
  • (1)post_thanks_javascript
  • (1)post_thanks_navbar_search
  • (1)postbit_legacy
  • (1)postbit_wrapper
  • (1)spacer_close
  • (1)spacer_open 

Phrase Groups Available:
  • global
  • postbit
  • reputationlevel
  • showthread
Included Files:
  • ./showpost.php
  • ./global.php
  • ./includes/init.php
  • ./includes/class_core.php
  • ./includes/config.php
  • ./includes/functions.php
  • ./includes/class_hook.php
  • ./includes/functions_notice.php
  • ./mobiquo/smartbanner.php
  • ./includes/functions_bigthree.php
  • ./includes/class_postbit.php
  • ./includes/class_bbcode.php
  • ./includes/functions_reputation.php
  • ./includes/functions_post_thanks.php
  • ./includes/functions_post_groan.php
  • ./includes/functions_misc.php 

Hooks Called:
  • init_startup
  • cache_permissions
  • fetch_postinfo_query
  • fetch_postinfo
  • fetch_threadinfo_query
  • fetch_threadinfo
  • fetch_foruminfo
  • style_fetch
  • cache_templates
  • global_start
  • parse_templates
  • fetch_musername
  • notices_check_start
  • global_setup_complete
  • showpost_start
  • bbcode_fetch_tags
  • bbcode_create
  • postbit_factory
  • showpost_post
  • postbit_display_start
  • post_thanks_function_post_thanks_off_start
  • post_thanks_function_post_thanks_off_end
  • post_thanks_function_fetch_thanks_start
  • post_thanks_function_fetch_thanks_end
  • post_thanks_function_thanked_already_start
  • post_thanks_function_thanked_already_end
  • post_groan_function_post_groan_off_start
  • post_groan_function_post_groan_off_end
  • post_groan_function_fetch_groans_start
  • post_groan_function_fetch_groans_end
  • post_groan_function_groaned_already_start
  • post_groan_function_groaned_already_end
  • bbcode_parse_start
  • bbcode_parse_complete_precache
  • bbcode_parse_complete
  • postbit_display_complete
  • error_fetch
  • showpost_complete