[lavenlove]

I feel like I’m floundering all the time lately. I have three kids - an 8 yo girl, 5 yo boy and 2 yo girl. The 8 yo is diagnosed with ADHD and SPD. She is in school and the 5 yo is in 1/2 day pre-k, the 2 yo is home with me full time. She’s extremely intelligent so ADHD isn’t presenting problems at school, but we have LOTS of issues at home. She talks back, she ignores what I tell her to do, and she 75% of the time complains when I tell her to clean up or get dressed, whatever needs to happen next. The 5 yo does some of the same; I think it’s highly likely he also has ADHD but he could also just be a regular little boy, copying bad behaviors of his big sister. Just need some concrete guidance on how to handle them. My husband came from a very punitive upbringing and feels like I’m constantly telling him he’s a bad dad when I critique his attempts to discipline the kids, so it’s a sore point between us. We have had lots of arguments about why I don’t want to spank the children and he’s finally let that go, thank God. Knowing her diagnoses has helped us a lot. We are in the process of trying meds for the ADHD and getting her into OT for the SPD.


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