[mokamoto]

Originally Posted by raisa

A quick story about how spanking works. Years ago my sister and BIL spanked their young son (1.5, maybe early 2yo) to keep him in bed at bedtime. He'd cry, go back to bed, but then come out of his room for them. Spanked, to bed, come out of the room, over. She was so frustrated -- was she supposed to spank him faster? Harder? I know I posted about it years ago on GCM because it was such a poignant story of a child hurting and yearning for love so badly that he would risk another spanking just to be with his parents for comfort.

Bless his heart my nephew is 8 years old and they have been struggling with nighttime toilet training for YEARS now. I know this affects all children for many reasons and can't be blamed solely on spanking. But when she says "why won't he just WAKE UP and come out of his room to pee?" I can't help but remember how she was determined to break his spirit so he'd never come out of his room at night again

This just made my eyes well up with tears! How aweful for that poor young man! As exhausted as I am right now bc my daughter (3) has night terrors at 2 am nightly, we all co-sleep bc I can't leave her to suffer her dreams alone. My son, who is 5, still loves to cuddle and we don't turn them away. My struggle is yelling, bc as a previous poster said, hitting/spanking was never an option. But another pp's comment resonated for me on yelling too, although she was talking about spanking- it's easy to be consistent but is lazy parenting and doesn't teach them anything but fear. My kids deserve better from me. for posting this discussion!