[Rose5000]

Originally Posted by Kiara.I

Does that matter? (Assuming you've removed the other foods of choice...) Will it mean that at the next meal he's actually hungry and will eat?
.

okay for example.
he is served dinner. doesn't like it.
goes to the kitchen looking for something.
let's say i have nothing that is "treat, or sweet" in there and he finds nothing else he wants, wanders out , goes to play ,

your Q. is, will then he be good and hungry for the next meal.

no, he will not wait until the next meal he will wait maybe another 1/2 to 1 hour and come back and ask me to make him something.

---------- Post added at 06:36 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:31 PM ----------

or beg for something sweet
or find something that isn't protein like olives and eat that

---------- Post added at 06:37 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:36 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Kiara.I

Sure.

I'm glad your son's getting hydrated. (Deep orange? Really? Is that consistent for him? Yikes!)
.

not all the time.

---------- Post added at 06:41 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:37 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Kiara.I

Sure.

I'm glad your son's getting hydrated. (Deep orange? Really? Is that consistent for him? Yikes!)



Does that matter? (Assuming you've removed the other foods of choice...) Will it mean that at the next meal he's actually hungry and will eat?



Well, I haven't had to deal with it, so not really.

He's 10. Teach him to cook. Seriously, make a list of precisely TWO things that he can choose to make himself to substitute for a meal if he doesn't like what's offered, and then make him take care of it. NOT junk as a substitute, those two choices. Peanut butter sandwiches are a common substitute I've seen, if he'll eat those. Or an egg and toast, something like that.

But at 10, you should be working toward giving him the skills to take care of that himself.

He's 11 now.

Peanut butter- no go--won't touch any nut! becasue as a baby he broke out in hives with peanuts so he is unwilling to try things like almond butter as well) egg and toast----scrambled eggs, but not toast (he doesnt' eat toast--weird, huh?....) Kiara, here's his favorite go to make himself easy meal that he likes to always have in the house by i only buy 1 or 3 at a time because i don't think they're that good for him--maybe i should reconsider and just buy lots of these: yakisoba or cup of noodles....what do you think?

and teaching him to cook is a good idea, yes. he actually can cook the following:
mushrooms
spinach in olive oil
grilled cheese
yakisoba

"But at 10, you should be working toward giving him the skills to take care of that himself." THIS.

---------- Post added at 06:47 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:41 PM ----------

Originally Posted by rjy9343

Have you had your son tested for allergies, autism or sensory issues or any other medical Issues?

i had him tested for autism.....he didn't have it, but the lady who did the first half of that assessment said he did have alot of things that pointed to the spectrum, but borderline.

Your son sounds very much like he has sensory issues of some sort to me.

yES, he absolutely does. we need to get him assessed for that as part of the current help-seeking I'm doing right now for him, but it's a little less urgent than some other issues. allergies? no, don't know how to go about that and with whom.

If he does, then food is a very scary thing to him.[

oH, my! yes! that's even how he reacts *sometimes* when I try to see if he will eat something new---he will act frightened, tense up, shake, and get non-verbal, make noises. like a panick reaction: 'please don't make me eat that!'

I got through to my husband who wanted to force the issue by comparing forcing her to eat to following him around with a spider. My husband is afraid of spiders and I am not. I explained that forcing her to eat is like me following him around with a big fuzzy spider insisting that he kiss and pet the spider since it just loves him to bits and pieces. Never mind that just thinking about it makes your heart rate go up and your palms sweat, I have decided that you are going to get over this nonsense about spiders no matter what. I am not sure that he completely believes that she fears food, but having a fear that he knows is in his head made him rethink his methods. He is still worried about her, he is just less inclined to take such a hard line with her.

that's good.

---------- Post added at 07:34 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:47 PM ----------

Originally Posted by hollybells

He's ten. We're not talking about a tiny toddler or pre-schooler. Barring feeding issues (and that's something to explore with his doctor / therapists), your job is to provide healthy food. He decides if he eats it. If you don't want him filling up on junk, don't bring it into the house. Not knowing any more than what you post, my kids at 10 would have likely chosen the treats / junkier foods if they knew they were there and if they knew I'd cave and let them have those instead of the healthier things I prepared for meals / snacks. I'd guess he knows how worried you are about his eating and he knows he has you over a barrel. If he refuses the healthier options, he likely knows you're going to give him the junkier things he's developed a taste for just to make sure he's eaten *something* ykwim?

Yes that exactly what we have goin on here d.

In our home, I've always included at least one thing I know each family member will eat. Beyond that, they're welcome to make themselves a bowl of cereal (multi-grain cheerios, raisin bran etc. ... nothing exciting ) or a simple sandwich. No one starves but the option isn't eat this chicken, rice and veggies or fill up on fruit snacks, chips and or Mr. Noodle. Oh, the littlest (age 3) loves hummus and multigrain crackers. Actually, he prefers to just eat the hummus with a spoon so that's a protein he can substitute.

that's awesome(hummus).
Can you paint a picture of a meal that has something everybody likes? Is there always a protein each will eat?

But I want to echo Kiara - we have a few anaphylactic food allergies but otherwise are dealing with neurotypical kids and what works in our home may or may not work in yours. I do think though at ten that it may be a preference that he knows will be indulged because you are so worried about him and his food intake. Start small - find a few healthier things that he likes and build from there. And, if it was me, I'd stop bringing in the "junk" (and please know I love me some junk and generally have a hidden stash of chocolate at all times ) until better eating habits are established.

Aaaaaand ... lots of post since I started so this may or may not be useful.

Very useful; thanks! With yakisoba I think u r right he knows I am worried abt his food intake d. Ineed to revive his favorite protein foods: meatloaf, salmon, chili or bean soup...