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Title: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: My Little Saint on June 03, 2005, 07:42:12 PM
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Okay, I am curious... I love gentle discipline and am learning more as each day passes. However, I don't really know how I'm going to transition as Ethan gets older, say 7, 8, 9 years old. I have been trying to apply some of the techniques in my classroom (I teach second grade), because I really don't like the way the school "disciplines" :/ It's all about taking away privileges that have nothing to do with what they actually did, etc, etc. Either, I'm doing it wrong or it doesn't work for kids this age and older, or because of the kids' backgrounds I have to modify in some way. I want to teach my kids in the classroom, as well as my own child, that not everything has a negative consequence and that they can find grace even when they make mistakes.

Any thoughts?

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Title: Re: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: Teribear on June 03, 2005, 09:14:20 PM
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My DD is nearly 8...now while she has been raised with GBD (for the most part) so I don't have issues with using it with her. And you won't with Ethan either. It will be what he's used to.

I work with kids and teens and I have found that I can apply it fairly well in a classroom situation too. But you also need to remember that GBD changes a bit as kids approach the logic stage (7-10 I think but Crystal will know for sure). I would recommend for a classroom situation "How to Teach So Kids Can Learn" its basically "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen" for the classroom. Its by Faber and Mazlish. Its wonderful.

HTH

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Title: Re: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: kalemommy on June 04, 2005, 11:28:07 AM
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As a teacher, I have found that the same approaches used in GBD (I didn't know it had a name) have worked very well with children as old as sixth grade.

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Title: Re: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: fourbygrace on June 04, 2005, 09:44:01 PM
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I would suggest reading Kids are Worth It! by Barbara Coloroso.

I started to read it a while ago and I thought that it applied more to older kids and so I would wait and read it when my dc are a little older. She also was (is ? ) a classroom teacher and I remember she talked about her approach in the classroom.

I am still learning GBD, but my oldest ds is 7 and it seems to be helping our relationship.

Blessings,
Mary

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Title: Re: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: ArmsOfLove on June 06, 2005, 12:20:38 PM
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Jane Nelson's "Positive Discipline" is also a good one. She's coming at a lot of this from a teacher perspective

It does work great with older children but when they aren't your own you have to assume they don't have the foundation of reflecting feelings and conflict resolution and need to take time to teach these things

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Title: Re: Gentle Discipline and older children
Post by: My Little Saint on June 13, 2005, 05:49:25 PM
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Thank you for your replies. I will check out these books. You are right ArmsofLove, when they are not your children, it is difficult. It's difficult with my own Also, the pressure of the system gets to you, because it is pretty straight forward and it is punitive. At least in the classroom, I can modify. Thanks again, and I will check out all of these resources.