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Title: biting
Post by: milkmommy on May 05, 2006, 06:00:47 PM
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Were having bitting problems. Like in situations where I need her to held my hand and she doesn't want to (ussually cause she wants to hold a toy or doll ect) so she tries to bite my hand. Shes succeeded twice. I've told her no biting and biting hurts, Any other suggestions.
Deanna
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Title: Re: biting
Post by: mommyTay on May 05, 2006, 08:38:15 PM
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I would love to read suggestions for biting too. Kat is REALLY bad and poor Mouse is getting the worst of the deal. My foster dd has a lot of deep issues and frustrating circumstances, so I am not sure anything is going to make a difference.
My supervisor at children services gave me a print out on biting from this site. It looks really good, hope you find some answers here.
http://www.childrenshospital.org/az/...ageS633P0.html
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Title: Re: biting
Post by: milkmommy on May 05, 2006, 10:59:45 PM
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Quote
Quote:
# powerless biting: Powerless biting occurs when a child is in need of feeling powerful. Sometimes, the youngest child in the family uses biting to gain power. To help prevent this type of biting:
* Make sure your child feels protected and is not always being picked on by others.
* Explain the situation to bigger or older children and get their help to make things more equal.
* If biting occurs, tell your child that he/she is not to bite and remove him/her from the situation right away. Stay with your child and help him/her to calm down. Explore other, better ways to handle the situation with your child, so he/she learns to handle emotions differently next time.
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I think this one fits our situation. She doing many things right like shes staying with me If I tell her far enough or come back she's obeying but their are times I'd like her to hold my hand mostly because I know were about to enter a place where she rally needs to or because shes stalling or being really slow so it moves her along... I need to
these situations and see if I can't involve her better and allow her to feel more controll but still keep her safe and moving if needed. Its also happning when bot h of us are tired something I need to consider.
Deanna
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Title: biting baby
Post by: Rbonmom on October 15, 2005, 01:03:42 AM
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My 11mo old likes to bite (a lot). He's not doing it out of frustration or anger or anything, I think it just feels good and he likes the reaction from people. I tell him "no biting" and since he does baby signs, also do the signs for it, but it doesn't seem to be helping. Mainly I just watch him and try to head him off when it looks like he's about to bite.
Recently he has biten my nephew (2yrs) a couple of times, and my sister jumps up and I can tell is frustrated by it. The couple of times it's happened I haven't done anything other than apologize and tell ds "no biting".
I guess the rub is that since ds has been 2mo, her ds has hit, kicked, slapped, and pinched my ds and my sister never intervened or told him "no". I felt at 18mo he was old enough to be using it as a teaching moment, but she just ignored it. But now, she's mad at me for not "teaching" my ds not to bite.
What can I do to stop this? I don't want ds to get a reputation as a 'biter' since no on likes to be around a kid who bites. He doesn't seem to be teething, so I don't think thats it. Any tips?
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Title: Re: biting baby
Post by: mom2threePKs on October 15, 2005, 05:08:14 AM
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Well, my dd was very oral and would chomp on stuff (including people) when she was excited or really happy. The best I can tell you is to try to figure out what situations get him in biting mood and head him off when you see it coming. Stay very close when you are with other children so you can intervene quickly. This is one of those things he just has to outgrow. Get a good variety of things he can chew on and give him a chew toy when he bites. This helped my dd a lot even up to age 3.
Quote from: Emmittsmama on October 15, 2005, 01:03:42 AM
Quote:
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I guess the rub is that since ds has been 2mo, her ds has hit, kicked, slapped, and pinched my ds and my sister never intervened or told him "no". I felt at 18mo he was old enough to be using it as a teaching moment, but she just ignored it. But now, she's mad at me for not "teaching" my ds not to bite.
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Well, you could say something like this after your ds bites
"I remember when (sister's ds) was this age. He was pretty aggressive, like that time________________. I guess they all outgrow it!"
Or you could realize that you didn't appreciate her parenting style then and don't now and what she thinks is irrelevant! :/
Magan
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Title: Re: biting baby
Post by: Joanne on October 15, 2005, 05:11:39 AM
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Quick cut and paste for biting (from my as yet unpublished book)
Biting
Some children are biters. Many who are biters are seeking oral sensation. A proactive way to take the edge off biting is
Biters, in general, are often oral seekers. If you increase the oral stimulation appropriately, you can decrease his desire to find it inapproriately. Increase spicy foods, chewy foods (sausage, fruit leather, bagels), hot and cold foods (smoothies, soup) and use a straw often.
Designate *one* toy as the biting toy and give it to him every time he bites, while removing him from the interaction and keeping victims safe and away. Let him know that you will help him until he can help himself.
How are his verbal skills? I'd do everything I can to find ways for him to express himself appropriately. Baby signs, notes, words, songs, gestures, facial expressions. Ways for him to say "give me space" or "I don't want to be happy" or "I am happy" or whatever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd be honest with your sis about your frustration and what you perceive as inequitable.
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Title: Biting
Post by: nebraskanmom on May 23, 2005, 12:57:19 PM
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We are away from home, which normally makes ds's behavior issues come out.
This time he's biting. Hard. I have bruises. I'm at a complete loss of what to do. I stop him every time I can see he's about to bite, tell him it hurts....I dont' know what to do!
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Title: Re: Biting
Post by: jujubnme on May 23, 2005, 01:54:16 PM
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Traveling can be so hard for some kids. Is he biting when mad, or just biting? Have you tried just giving him something else to bite on? Not sure I have much advice to offer. But
that must be so frustrating (and painful).
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Title: Re: Biting
Post by: ArmsOfLove on May 23, 2005, 02:27:00 PM
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Is he getting his two year molars?
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Title: Re: Biting
Post by: nebraskanmom on May 23, 2005, 11:18:46 PM
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He is mostly biting when he's angry or upset...generally not feeling right so not acting right. Sometimes he is biting for play or for sheer enjoyment of the bite - in those times he is happy to bite something else. We made a game of biting his sling this afternoon. He is getting his lower canines.
I'm mostly looking for direction on what I can do in the times that I know he is biting because he feels angry toward me. I don't know what to do, and my "instinct" (what I was raised with, essentially), isn't very gentle.
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Title: Re: Biting
Post by: ArmsOfLove on May 24, 2005, 10:01:05 AM
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Practice on yourself . . . take your forefinger and place it sideways under his lower jaw, press gently up so that he can't open his mouth. When you see him going in for the bite, prevent it. If you see him angry and fear being bit, be on guard
And say "I will not let you bite me. Biting hurts. And if he does bite you I'd immediately spin him around into a bear hug and say the same thing. Then get back to addressing what upset him in the first place
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Title: Biting!
Post by: luvinmykidz on May 10, 2005, 06:00:12 PM
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OK my 2.5 year old (Almost 3) has started biting recently!! I don't understand the whole grace based discipline thing and I want to know how to deal with it. He isn't doing it in anger, he is laughing while he does it. My husband threatens to put him in time out but of course doesn't do it....today he came up and bit me and I was just so upset by it I put him in his room
He was screaming hysterically at the door and crying huge crocodile tears. When he came out he hugged me and told me he was sorry....he seems fine now but I just want to know how to use positive discipline in biting?? Thanks in advance
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Title: Re: Biting!
Post by: FlyinKiwi on May 10, 2005, 09:18:25 PM
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Bitting is a nasty one - I have two that are just coming out of it
If you can catch him just before he bites you can put your finger firmly under his chin and gently close his mouth - he can't bite when you do that. Saying something like "you can't bite mummy, but here you can bite this" while you offer him something to chew on.
I'm sure others will have more suggestions.
Also remember ... this too shall pass!
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Title: Re: Biting!
Post by: SingingPraise on May 11, 2005, 08:02:01 AM
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Grace based discipline is about comfort vs. punishment.
Putting him in his room , i know my 21 mo wouldn't understand WHY he is alone in his room...he's not quite ablle to make that connection between what he did and being sent to his room, kwim?
My son has recently started biting. Us, the blankets, pillows, toys, books... I think personally that its a sensory stimulation issue. it FEELS good to bite things. He doesn't understand that its not ok to bite people.
Instead of saying "no biting" (cuz as crystals articles infer, they only hear "biting")
we repeat
'no teeth on mommy'. or 'no teeth on books' etc.
or even better we say "teeth hurt people, teeth are for food. are you hungry?" and offer him something to sink his teeth into other then our bodies. LOL
I also will cup his chin in my hands and say 'teeth hurt, teeth are for food not people"
It takes alot of work, redirection and intervention but we're doing alot better here. I find he is only biting when he's very wound up in agressive play (we're rough h ousing) so sometimes it just means we wind down from rough play into calm play and he calms with it - has a snack and drink and the biting stops til the next time.
I also know when he's starting to bite that I change what we're doing including me getting up fromwhere I am and introducing a new activity or change of scenery.
Biting is generally not because your baby is trying to hurt you. He doesn't think the biting is funny - h e thinks your reaction to it is funny. So you have to change your reaction. Figure out when the biting is happening and in relation to what (if anything) and then change things. If you're sitting on the couch with dh watching a movie and baby is biting - he's wanting attention for example. So we'd pause the movie and go do something with him and watch the movie later, kwim?
good luck . hope some of this might help
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Title: Re: Biting!
Post by: ArmsOfLove on May 12, 2005, 09:24:12 AM
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Well, my first thought is "is he getting his 2 year molars?" Teething can increase biting. When my youngsters bite I put my finger sideways under their chin and with gentle pressure can hold their mouth closed (practice on yourself) and I say, very firmly, "No biting. Biting hurts." I do this in conjunction with teaching about making amends. I would also look for the promptors for the biting? Is it to get your attention?
I would increase oral stimulation for him: lemonade, spicy foods, drinking with straws, cold foods and drinks, hot foods and drinks, different textures, and introduce a "biting object"--something you give to him *every time* he bites and redirect his biting energy to it.
hth
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