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Old 11-28-2007, 09:10 PM   #9
Dandelion
Rose Garden
 
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 5,508
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Default Re: List of family rules and consequences

Quote:
What do you want to TEACH?
I am not always entirely sure and that is most of my problem...
Quote:
For example, if a child runs in the house when it's a stated and known rule not to I'd have them go back to the start and walk the walk. Talking rudely is cleaned up by making amends and speaking respectfully.
I like these ideas and I do usually redirect with respectful speech - when I can keep my cool long enough. The running idea will be interesting - I am not sure if that will work or not , but we will give it a try tomorrow.... most of the time I need the kids to just calm down, but it is really hard to get them to that - the only way is that they get "in trouble". Very punitive. I try saying things like "you need to calm down now. go sit on the couch and look at a book. you sit here. your sister is going to sit on the other couch. you need to stay here and not play with her because you two were playing too rough/jumping on the furniture/not listening to my instructions, etc." I don't really know any other way to defuse the situations that arise here. Ds2 has especially been testing me lately. I will say something like "I am going down to the basement to put the laundry in, you need to sit at the table, listen to this tape and paint until I come back." I will come back 3 minutes later and he has invited his sister under the table to dump all the crayons on the floor, take the wrappers off and break them into tiny pieces. It is situations like this that just drain me all day long. "Your brother is sleeping and I need you to not wake him up. You must play in the playroom " several reminders later, I leave them for less than a minute and ds2 has led his sister on a noisy yelling charge into my bedroom where the baby is sleeping. I am sure that ds2 needs more positive attention and I am trying to give him whatever time that I have, but I just end up so frustrated with him sometimes - he is literally bouncing off the walls! I need to have a very do-able plan in effect.
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aka, mamacheetah, Nicole
wife to one daydreamer
mama to seven - six boys with a girl in there somewhere
B 8/99
O1 5/03
V 6/05
M 7/07
L 11/10
H 11/12
O2 11/15
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