[katiekind]

The Pearls have a lot of good stuff to say. I think they portray a warmth and understanding toward children that (for instance) Ezzo lacks. And even apart from that warmth, I find there is a lot to agree with in their articles.

But as you point out, there is also some very troubling material.

I think the "grace" differential that you observe is the difference between the responsibility/accountability of a Christian teacher and leader and compassion towards a sheep who gets led astray by a shepherd who operates without accountability. :/ I find it no end of frustrating.

I'm glad you found an insight that helped you. I agree with you that relationship is very important. Also when I look out over the families I know that have been successful over the years, there is one common thread that I see: parents who are very involved with their kids, who never give up, who keep their heads in the ballgame. (And it is tempting to lose one's focus as the kids get older.)