Today I was at my church's unofficial moms' gathering called "MOMTIME." Usually we just sit around and gab about non-mom stuff, which is a nice break from the constant mommy-ness of life. Today one mom talked about how her 5-month-old, who WAS sleeping through the night, suddenly decided to wake multiple times each night for the last few nights. She looked really tired and obviously needed help figuring out what to "do." One of the moms jumps to her feet to proclaim the goodness of Babywise
. I'm not sure if anyone noticed my whole body cringe, but after she was done with her praise, I very quietly mentioned some of the negatives of the Ezzos and told the new mama to trust her instincts--not her emotions or her tired body, but her instincts. If her instincts said that her baby needed comfort and maybe a little boobie-snack, then go with that. I assured her that this will NOT last forever (but I didn't tell her that it could last years) and that she WOULD get to sleep again in this life.
Well, later in our MOMTIME the same mama tells us that she paddled her son (not sure of exact age, but elementary school aged) after she got off the phone the other day with another one of the moms because he said he didn't want her (the mom) to touch him. She said, "OH!! You don't want me to touch you?!?! Well, I'll touch you where you will really feel it!"
Again, a full-body cringe. I didn't say anything because ALL the moms with "spanking-age" children started talking about their funny spanking stories. I just wanted to cry and say, "Gee, I'm not sure what you taught your son except that his emotions and personal boundaries are subject to your pride and anger. That sure wouldn't make me feel very safe or help me to trust you with big issues down the road"
This is the VERY first time I have witnessed first-hand casualness toward spanking and the "littleness" of children. My heart is just aching for that boy!