A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

My girls are moderately sensitive to gluten, but they just don't care. :( It causes constipation and gas in them both, circles under PJ's eyes, "chicken skin" on their upper arms and thighs, and the wheat belly pudge.

The whole reason we all went GF in the first place is because, when she was 4, AJ started having severe stomach pains after eating it (although it was such a delayed reaction that we didn't even connect it to gluten at first - we only went off gluten because "everybody was doing it" and I'd heard people GF because of similar stomach pains, LOL). She stopped getting those after being off gluten for a year, but it ended up getting reintroduced into their diets and she didn't get the stomach pains anymore, so we thought maybe she'd been healed from it because we'd caught it so early and been off it for so long. But they older she (and PJ) got, the more these other issues started creeping up.

The problem is that AJ HATES eating GF, and it causes HUGE arguments. Those of you who have seen my homeschool posts about AJ know that this child has strong, strong opinions and that we've had a lot of battles over it. The same is true with gluten.

I don't want to fight with her. But I also am living proof that she's going to be miserable as an adult if she keeps eating gluten and I don't want her to deal with that. I'm also torn between being the parent/the logical thinker in this situation who is able to see the consequences of this when she can't, and the whole "parents, do not exasperate your children" thing. I am also very worried about creating food battles and how that might cause even worse issues with her down the road. She is also my worst eater - she eats like a bird and has a very limited number of foods she is willing to eat. And she simply *won't* eat if all I have are gluten free options of things and she doesn't feel like eating a non-bread/breaded type item.

Tomorrow she starts school for the first time at a hybrid program, and she wants sandwiches for lunch. But not with gf bread. So another battle is about to ensue. And I just don't want to fight it anymore.

What do you do when your kid doesn't care about the consequences of what they eat and how it affects their body? Do you hold your ground because you're the parent and know better, or do you say, "It's their body" and let them do it? Do you make *them* buy gluten options of food if they want it? Do you make *them* pay for the fiber supplements so they don't get constipated?

What do you do when natural consequences can have long-lasting effects and they're just not mature enough connect those dots? Or they do understand but just don't care? (Since plenty of adults can be that way too, so it's not necessarily a maturity thing but just a personality thing.)

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Can you buy regular bread and gf then put the gf bread in the regular bread bag... let her see you making sandwiches from that bag... would she notice?

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Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I wouldn't buy food that my children react to. I don't think I would make it a battle beyond that. You have food options that she can eat. If she chooses not to eat, that is the natural consequence. :shrug3

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I believe it has to be their choice because otherwise when they get older they binge in rebellion to the restriction. My kids were totally dairy free for a long time but as they got older I loosened up and let them decide. My 11 year old won't eat dairy (and gets mad at me when I cook with it. The older ones will eat pizza but not things like sour cream or cream cheese. They will eat ice cream occasionally but eat it with the admitted knowledge that they will suffer afterwards.

I would consider letting her eat what she wants but have her keep a food journal that includes how she feels and you could as well and then compare notes.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Margaret is similar in her sensitivity. She'll get that hard "colic belly" tight itchy skin she has trouble making it too the bathroom in time (though not as bad anymore) and over time just issues with vomiting in general. We briefly tried reintroducing gluten after being off for over a year. She actually went two weeks with no reaction and we thought Ohh good maybe she has outgrown this. Nope when it came back it was full force. :cry.. She is also dairy free with similar issues. (obvious dairy if its like the 37 thing on an ingredient list we usually let it go)
She does sometimes complain especially because the rest of us are not GF. We are lucky that she not extremely sensitive so we dont overly worry about small cross contaminations and dont HAVE to have a total GF home. However she does when exposed enough to react have bad enough reactions that is keeps her from actually "insisting" on breaking her diet restrictions.
I wont buy what we know makes her sick. However I do compromise in other areas. We tried different types of breads before finding ones she likes. They are simple "white" breads with no redeeming nutritional value but ehh they are also safe I let the rest go. I keep a bag of her approved and safe Chicken nuggets (the sliver platter GF honey nuggets with the pooh bear on the front), and sometimes corn dogs on hand. Again not exactly the picture of health but for her still a safer choice and her "special" go to foods when she having to pass on the rest of the family dinner of gluten pizza or Lasagna (BTW I know can be made GF but she hates sauces anyways). Her overall food choices are whole foods meats DF yogurts Fruits and veggies nut butters etc a few compromises helps keep the peace.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I'm with Sara. I would tell her if she wants to buy gluten stuff with her own money and prepare her own food with what she's bought, then go for it, but you will only be buying food that you know is best for her. I wouldn't make it a battle, simply a "sorry, this is your only option" kind of thing.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I agree with MoS that for a restricted diet to be successful, you need buy-in from your kid. Otherwise they'll probably "cheat" when you aren't around. Because it is *hard* to be gf in a gluten world, especially when you are well aware of how good gluten baked goods are, and how gf options are not at all a comparable replacement. (It's hard for my always-gf middle dd, who *is* on board with eating gf - she won't cheat, because she fears the inevitable stomach pains that follow.)

I see three separate-but-related problems:
1) ways to get buy-in, or at least a partial buy-in, from AJ
2) what can you do wrt minimizing gluten while she's emphatically not on board with eating gf
3) practical things to make eating gf less painful/distasteful for her

I like MoS's food journal idea wrt number 1. I'd also probably aim for partial buy-in - being gf most of the time, but eating the occasional gluten treat. Maybe, if she was somewhat amenable to negotiation, she could pick out 4-6 favorite, irreplaceable gluten items, and be gf everywhere else. (Granted, this wouldn't work if she ate all of her top 6 every day. Another idea could be one gluten thing per meal or per day, in treat-sized portions, not meal-staple portions.). And there are some mainstream gf carbs - Cheerios and Chex, for example - that are both tasty and carby and normal - and gf. They might be less objectionable.

Wrt 2, maybe it would help if the house was low-carb? Or at least low-gluten-carbs? If you mostly cook naturally gf meals, you limit both the need for inferior gf substitutes and the number of tasty gluten carbs in the house. So long as she's adamantly not on board, I'd try to keep the whole house as gf as possible - and definitely keep around naturally gf treats she likes. That doesn't really help on the sandwiches thing, though - seems your best bet is to give on the bread while keeping most of her other meals gf, or to go with some non-sandwich option that is naturally gf and contains things she generally likes. I wouldn't send her with food you know you hate - she'd probably not eat it and it would just go to waste. (Which is bad in general and extra bad given how pricey gf bread is.)

Looking at number three: my middle dd is quite picky about gf baked goods, and that's *without* knowing what the gluten options taste like. Out of a half dozen gf breads we've tried, she only likes two of them. (And they are a *lot* better toasted - some of the gf breads are almost inedible without toasting, but once toasted are half-way decent.) We still haven't found a gf granola to replace her beloved Chex granola, after trying at least six. Once we find a good brand, she clings to it - she's entirely over trying out new gf things, since she likes so few of them. I generally refrain from making her finish off the failed new thing - I finish it off myself (unless it's so bad that I don't want to eat it, either :shifty). And very few of them are truly *good* - but are more "good - for gf".

Middle dd is the only gf person in the house. We make sure that everything we eat is either gf or there's a dd-approved gf substitute. If we don't have a dd-approved gf substitute for something, then we just don't bring it into the house, period. That way, eating at home is just as normal for her as for everyone else - I don't want her to look longingly at gluten treats she can't have in her own home, kwim? There's enough of that out of the house :sigh.

Which is what makes a restricted diet hard - keeping to it when you are out and about and miss out on things because of your diet. And it makes you stand out, too. Do you think that might contribute to AJ's wanting "regular" bread - not just because it tastes different (and usually worse :shifty) than wheat bread, but also because it is *obviously* different? That eating gf would mark her out as different from her peers, and different in a way she doesn't want (esp as she doesn't want to eat gf in the first place)?

Idk, from what you wrote she sounds like she really likes her carbs - doesn't like a lot of non-carb things - and that does make being gf hard. Because gf substitutes for gluten carbs are the most expensive and least tasty kinds of gf food. I think I might sideline the gluten issue a bit, and work on increasing the number of naturally gf non-carb things she eats, while also reducing the place of gluten carbs in your family's diet. That would help reduce her gluten intake, and generally help break her carb addiction, even if she never goes gf.

---------- Post added at 11:30 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:23 AM ----------

Ime, there's a huge difference between gf bread and wheat bread - there's no way to miss the difference. Gf bread can be tasty, but it's an entirely different consistency - it's not anything like wheat bread. If general you really likes squishy, squunchy white bread - there's just no gf substitute for that.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

ITA with other posters. This is hard.

Idea-wise, this is the best texture gluten-free bread I have found: Glutino http://www.glutino.com/products/breads/ I haven't tried their white bread, but their multigrain is very close to gluten bread IMO. Udi's is absolutely NOTHING like Glutino - they're totally different textures.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Our fav GF bread is kinnikinnick. Always toasted. Alternatively, Rudi's bread (also toasted) is really sweet and she may go for that?

I also thought about you getting her some good digestive enzymes (we use Garden of Life ones that are chewable and organic and yummy) for when she insists on having gluten. I pop a few when we're eating out and I can't be 100% sure what I'm getting is GFCF, and they really make a difference.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

My oldest "should" be gluten free. She resists the idea with a strong attitude. How we have handled it is all family meals are gluten free. The end. I do not buy things to make multipl meals for dinner. Most meals are naturally gluten free but if we make pasta it's Gf pasta. Her lunches are gluten free because I just don't really buy bread Gf or otherwise. It was getting moldy because 3/5 of us were not eating it. :shrug

If we go out or she is with friends sh will eat wheat and on ocassion she will spend her own money on Nilla wafers and goldfish but at home the opportunity to have gluten is minimized.

This has meant that a majority of the time she feels good. Her skin is clearer and her belly feels and looks better. Then she "cheats" and the symptoms are me obvious because she doesn't have regular exposure.

At the end of the day it's up to her but since I do the shopping I get a say because it effects our budget and whole house health.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I think there can be a difference between "not buying food my children *react* to" and "only buying food that you know is *best* for her" :think.
I mean, I don't ever feed my gf dd gluten, because eating it just once *will* hurt her. But I do buy her the occasional gf junky treat, which is obviously not nutritionally best for her, but in small doses doesn't do harm and is good in other ways.

And there's also a difference between only *buying* food that you know is best, and disapproving of ever *eating* non-best food.
In terms of what I *buy*, I avoid artificial colors (for everyone) just as religiously as I avoid gluten for dd (I refer to them as killer colors :shifty). But when it comes to food from outside sources, I do allow the kids to eat stuff with artificial colors (whereas dd doesn't eat gluten, period). I don't think artificial colors are harmless, but I do think the harm from the occasional outside food is negligible. So I do allow them to have the occasional outside artificial color food *with my blessing* even though I do believe that they are harmful in large doses over time, and so refuse to buy them and disapprove of eating them regularly.


Anyway, so I think the question NM needs to answer for herself is:
*do I believe that it is possible for AJ to eat *some* gluten in a way that largely mitigates the problems? (In which case she could give her blessing to gluten exceptions to a partially gf diet, whether that means being ok with AJ buying/eating gluten food outside the home, or whether she's ok with bringing certain gluten foods into the home under certain being-a-responsible-gluten-eater conditions.)
OR
*do I believe that it is impossible for AJ to safely eat *any* gluten, and so I cannot either be involved in buying her gluten food or give my blessing to her buying/eating outside gluten food?

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

It's also a level of cross contamination I'd even not be comfortable with ( and I'm pretty relaxed in this area).

Mine likes the kinnikinnick (sp?) Gf White because it's squishy.. Wal-Mart's gfs loaves also meet her approval.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I think, based on your other posts, she would find a way to eat gluten. I think you're more likely to avoid an eating disorder by letting it go. In a few years, she'll care enough not to eat it.

It'll stay in your house because of your DH, right?

Check out this part of the definition of consistency

agreement, harmony, or compatibility, especially correspondence or uniformity among the parts of a complex thing:

http://www.dictionary.com/browse/consistency

HARMONY

:heart:heart:heart

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Ok, please note that this is a subject that I feel extremely passionate about and I mean no disparaging remarks to any of you moms.

With that said, I would not buy 1 single gluten item and bring it through the door. She will not starve herself. She will eat when she is hungry.

Chicken Skin as it is called is Dermatitis herpetiformis which is really celiac disease.

(I have a sister that is non compliant and cheats right and left because it is 'too hard'........rolling my eyes. I spent $1,000 to go back home and provide her with food, cook to show her and fill her freezer and she would not even go to the kitchen to try to learn how to make foods that are good and tasty and YES gluten free treats can be just as good as the gluten)

I was a baker pre gluten free days and then I became our local celiac group's baker before it was popular and my health took a downward turn.

IF I had known what Celiac disease was prior to our youngest daughter's 17th birthday, we would have been gf from 1986 and hopefully preserved her fertility. She is barren because of non controlled celiac disease. My oldest sister, was a registered nurse, she would not go gluten free and we buried her 6 months after she found out she had colon cancer.


I have no problem sitting down with a daughter your daughters age and telling her just what she is risking. Our youngest doesn't blame us for not treating her celiac disease. I begged doctors from post to post to check into her gastro issues, but I was the mom that was too involved and worried too much.........6 bms a day were 'normal for her'.

Celiac disease is not like playing with sugar and giving a little more insulin. You can't stick gf bread in a gluten bag....you just contaminated it. A little gluten DOES a lot of damage down the line.

I have a friend in our support group that has a stomach full of tumors and scar tissues..............it is just a matter of time before they become cancer. They have removed all they can for now. (She was an adult when she discovered she was celiac.)


To me, just as I would not let a 12 yr old decide to play with loading a gun, I would not allow her to have gluten in our home. I would talk until I had no more breath about how she is playing with her life.


I am sorry if this passionate post offended any of you, but I am so beyond angry at my sisters........the one that died and the one that doesn't want to cook for putting me through the emotional roller coaster of watching them eat themselves to death one gluten bite at a time.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

There is a difference between gluten intolerance and celiac. If the ops daughter has celiac I would agree with you fully. I'm very sorry to hear about your family members.

What is usually called chicken skin is keratosis Pilaris (my daughter and I both have/had it) not DH. Dh is not usually found on the upper arms though it can be anywhere.

Op have you had your daughter tested for celiac or did you just go GF?

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Current gastrointerological studies are finding that celiac disease is a spectrum and gluten intolerance/sensitivity us the first sign you need to be gluten free. Anythjng beyond that means you already have gut damage that you may or may not ever recover from and will only "manage" with medical care and staying 100% gluten free. :think


If she is full blown celiac, she is taking her life in her hands every single time she eats gluten. With GS/GI the risks are lower (for now) but will stack up. :shrug3


I get chewed out by pediatricians quite often, but we do not and will not have gluten in our home.

Not even our pets can have it. My dog's parents have the dog version of celiac so she and all her litter mates and subsequrnt litter mated have to stay gluten free. Our cat has been GF since we got her. We changed her food as soon as she came to live with us. I react even to saliva either gluten in it.

My kids have only had accidental gluten exposure. I saw one child go completely non verbal and have several potty regression and rages that lasted for three months. Twice. NEVER EVER AGAIN.

I have one child who shows no obvious reactions. But, with his other stomach issues- we are not chancing anything at all with family members diagnosed on both sides of my family, 3 individuals in my immediate family besides myself, and food issues that my husband's family refuse to have tested because they don't want a limited diet like what we have.:shrug3

I'm the end it's your choice to sethe a good fxample as a parent. What she does outside your house is one thing. What you allow at home is another.

After my kids saw what the kart gluten exposure did things my eldest, they both recommended that they never want gluten contact again at bothered asked for help in telling their teachers and keeping them safe.

Legally, without a firm diagnosis (which we won't ever get due that what it takes to get a gold standard diagnosis), schools are not required to accommodate us. But the anecdotal evidence is enough that everyone has agreed to stay on board. :phew

I cook and make the kids all their treats and breakfasts and lunches for school. What I don't make is from trusted GF companies that have no other items processed in their plants besides gluten free food. We've had schär, frei von and the edeka brand gf bread only. We don't explicitly temm/remind people our food is gf. Not a single person who has tried anything has complained. It tastes the same to them. We know a recipe has passed muster when it flies by me and the ngf people as acceptable. I don't do bread or cakes that don't taste or feel remotely like gluten containing products. :shrug3

Cross contamination is the bane of my existence. I now wear a vogmask mask if in the mall or at grocery centers due to bakeries and restaurants. I also have to use it at ikea.:cry but, it is better than being sick again.

I understand the struggle. I fought diagnosis hard. I have struggled all of my years with gut issues and was not diagnosed until I was in my 20s and have been assured I may never fully recovered due to the damage of it going so long without diagnosis, even with a strict 100% gf diet and doing gut healing protocols. :( this isn't to fault my parents, but the medical community we were saddled with so long. :shrug3

So. That being said. You know your child. If she hasn't been diagnosed with celiac or DH Duhring, now is the time to pursue that, fight for nutritional guidance and explicit talks with how she is harming herself in the long run if she remains non compliant. No need to shame her. This is just as serious as being diagnosed as T1 diabetic. :yes

Just my 2c

---------- Post added at 09:05 AM ---------- Previous post was at 08:47 AM ----------

I do apologize for all my spelling errors- posting on a mobile phone is hard when your hands are so big. ;)

I did want to add that with as many people who are underinsured and underemployed - saying anything less than a gold standard diagnosis is classist and often sexist.
There are three valid modes of diagnosis, and self-diagnosis should be trusted when empirical evidence backs it up. Gold standard is a positive test and GI scope + biopsy. Silver standard is either positive blood tests or GI scope + biopsy or dermatitis herpetiformis Duhring. Bronze standard is when a doctor sees all the symptoms and comorbid conditions and says "I'm not stressing your body or mind further, this is what you have, and this is how to fix it.". Self-diagnosis is valid if the empirical evidence backs it up. I was self-diagnosed for a good 5 or 6 years before I had a doctor take my medical notes in hand and ask why I wasn't being treated like a celiac patient. I had to explain how American doctors don't have to study as much outside of their field, and how short and cursory the coverage of celiac and gluten sensitivity are each year in journals. I also explained that to manage my health, I had to take to reading GI journals to stay abreast of new findings because I couldn't trust my doctors to know what the research was due to their case loads. It was the first time I felt human in the eyes of my doctor and not some hysterical woman bound to be sent to a mental ward. We now compare notes and look at the research together when something interesting comes out. ATM, not much is happening in relation to studies as many GIs are focusing on a vaccination or pill related cure.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I've been lucky with my kid, he has an actual wheat allergy besides the celiac gene and obvious intolerance. I don't know that the science would get through to him, but he's been exposed exactly once in 7 years and the belly pain was pretty memorable. He has other allergens that register the same severity that he eats on occasion because we've never seen any effect at all besides eating them too much will cause chicken skin or mild eczema. He's been really compliant for a kid that isn't generally compliant with anything unless there is a reason that makes sense *to him*.

At some point it has to be their choice. He's never felt weird about it until maybe the last year or so. It's an awkward age. He doesn't want to eat things that make him feel bad, he just wants to fit in. He's had anaphylactic episodes from cross contamination from nuts so it's a huge fear of his. He has severe anxiety. We've had to work hard to get to a place that he knows he can touch or be around and even eat some of his minor allergens after having anaphylaxis to something he isn't even allergic to. :sigh

Eating disorders are a real concern, and barring actual celiac I would err on the side of it being her choice.


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Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

How many days a week is the hybrid program?

My thought is that I would maintain GF at home for all dinners and breakfasts, but allow the sandwiches on a part-time basis at first...let her start the program with a "normal" lunch and keep a diary of symptoms. Let her know that she will be expected to take 1 naturally gluten-free lunch per ___(pick a reasonable amount of time)___. Assure her as she starts to complain that she can take a sandwich to the first day, but the longer the meltdown lasts, the more you'll consider rescinding the offer or shortening the time frame. Tell her that she can look at what other people are eating and request whatever yummy-looking goodness she wants that might get other people mildly jealous that she gets better food, or she can pretend that she ran out of bread, or whatever, but once a month or once a week or once every four classes, she's getting a naturally gf meal, so be ready to pick one without complaining.

After a while, when she's settled into a safe GF meal for those days, I'd try to get her to come up with a second or third choice to alternate. Then, with food diary in hand, I'd try to get her buy-in to replacing more of those sandwich meals with the GF ones. And when she starts yelling that it's not fair to change the rules, I'd tell her that I'd given her time to fit in and time to find options, but that I'm not willing for her to compromise her health over the long-term...that this was a temporary offer made out of consideration for her feelings, but not a sustainable one.

That's about the time I'd start talking about people in support groups suffering as adults Maybe sooner. And maybe with her personality, a temporary laxness might backfire. You can answer that better than I can. But my thought is that social anxiety is probably driving the resistance right now, and if symptoms are mild right now, I'd be willing to cheat a little to get her through this time period compliant rather than rebellious...getting her on more solid ground emotionally before trying to get her to buy-in for the long-term.

I don't know if that's the right strategy medically. I'm looking at it from more of a strong-willed perspective, and it may be that it's too dangerous to play that game. I'm just thinking that with her being old enough to circumnavigate you, I'd rather direct the cheating and limit it rather than try to be strict and have her blow it purposefully behind your back.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

So much great info! Our house is GF and has been for a long time even though not everyone needs to be GF. It's easiest for me and best for everyone.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

My dd, 11, who is allergic was addicted to wheat/junk food (when I adopted her) that was one of my first clues that she had allergies. . . It took a few weeks for her to like other food. (She doesn't like how she feels now when exposed to her allergens, so she agrees with the food restrictions -- but prays every night for God to heal her allergies :shifty -- she's seen me be healed of some significant allergies, so she has some precedent). My other dd, 8, has sensitivities and we're working to heal her gut and then reintroduce things. Not because we care about having gluten at home so much, she likes other things, but because it's hard when we're out. She was gluten free for two years, before, but we didn't do anything specifically to heal her gut then. The three of us have all done aloe vera (we found one that doesn't taste bad, almost just like water really, [but then I wonder if could really be helping as much if it doesn't taste bad :giggle]) and she is doing ferments and/or taking okra pepsin with each meal. Both girls and I have started to take enzymes with meals because we needed help digesting carbs (the girls take tummyzymes and like them).

I guess I would let her choose what to eat at her age and situation, but I don't think I would be buying it for her. . . Is there any way you could get her on board for two months of gut healing? Or do you think that might help? (So, like pick a start date and she can add enzymes now but eat whatever she wants until that time. Then go off gluten for your set amount of time while eating some delicious foods that you've picked out together).

Younger dd and I don't like much of the "gluten free" stuff, but we do like homemade apple/banana/pumpkin breads or apple/peach cobblers with gluten free flours, "nature's bakery" fig bars, "Pamela's" cookies are really good. The girls get rice noodles that are kind of like ramen but a bit healthier. Um, does she like sweet potatoes at all? Roasted chicken with coconut flour breading and honey sauce, with french fries? Egg fried rice? Gluten free ice-cream :shrug3 Potato pancakes with ketchup? Nachos on (organic) corn chips?

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

I'm in the "I have no clue what I'd do or what I'm doing" camp. :sigh I'm struggling mightily w this with out 17yo.

We've been gluten free at home over a decade with very ocassion all "cheats." While we r all much much healthier, we no longer experience horrible reactions to gluten :think we did gaps diet for quite awhile. That and treating for candida were super important for everyone. My dd2 is also getting LDA for food allergies and that's also helped her.

I believe we still have health issues from gluten but have moved to allowing them to choose what they put in their bodies BUT I will not purchase it :no nor will it be served at a meal I provide.

Even this isn't working that great and we've gone so far as to tell eldest dd (17) if she doesn't minimize cheating she will begin having to purchase her own symptom control meds/supplements (she gets migraines and heartburn -- so NSAIDs, papaya). My logic is she knows it affects her and still uses it so she can pay for the instant damage to her system.

Our children's medical needs are significant so with the exception of self inflicted medical issues (like too much gluten or sugar, we will continue to Cover their medical expenses until they are either done w college or established in a career. So, this was a big deal telling her she'd become in charge of purchasing symptom meds (I see her needing them more as she cheats.) however, I'm willing to bend and help her figure out how to avoid cheating. We've never had much gluten free junk food in the house (pre packaged items) so I'm helping her figure out if that would help or baking more would help. We've found new recipes together - we made lemon sorbet tonight when dd started craving a pastry :yum) I will buy and allow gf treats more even if they contain sugar ( for us, sugar is evil but less evil than gluten so "the lesser of two evils")

We make a plan together and then I ask if she wants accountability. she's improving w this plan even though I feel my frustration at her self inflicted issues. She has enough chronic and long term issues she's battling. I find myself annoyed and upset w how hard we've fought to get her healthy and to watch this.

When we've argued and I've gotten upset , I've stopped, calmed down, and shared my mama heart. I told her I flash back to when she was bed ridden and when she's needed acupuncture twice a week to get out of bed. I've told her that I Get panicky and scared because her regaining her health has been such a one step Forward one step back process. BUT I remind her it's her body and her mom is just having a panic attack ;)

Honestly w my almost 12yo, I still put my foot down and tell her no or say how often she can have gluten.

I tell the kids the equivalent of 3 m&m's in an Olympic size pool is the ratio of how much gluten messes up our bodies. I won't pay for or contribute to that. :no but I will help them by finding out what would help them walk down a difficult Road. One thing that helps is that I'm 100% gluten free and don't cheat when they do. I've accidentally gotten gluten though.

My DH does not bring gluten into the house EVER. He's always been phenomenal about that and I'm eternally grateful.

Oh and some practical notes: we use glutenease which has been great. We get it at Walgreens.

Here are the other most powerful things that I believe have healed my D.C.
*gaps diet (although I wish we hadn't done so many ferments because we cannot tolerate them at all anymore without getting candida). It was probably broth and healthy foods and lack of sugar that helped us)
*candida treatment including pharmaceuticals (doflucan)
*grapefruit seed extract
*keepimg refined sugar to a minimum

Long term supplements:
Probiotics
digestive enzymes (we use now super enzymes)

ETA: just for reference, we do not have celiacs. We have what they have defined as "gluten sensitivity" but over the decade we can see how horribly it affects us and the affects last for months.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

This sounds very difficult, and I will admit that I have 100% buy-in, agreement, compliance, and even appreciation from my kids. Kitten has severe allergies, and Monkey was born into an allergy-free home. Monkey has shown reactions herself, but not anaphylaxis like Kitten. Neither kid has tasted gluten.

We also talk *a lot* about nutrition and our gut heath in our home.

So, from my perspective, with the reading and research that I have done. With our experiences - I would not allow the food allergens at all.

What she has going on is a carb addiction and she has what my doctor refers to as "critters" in her gut that are controlling her brain. She is in a vicious circle. It is partly, if not fully, why she is so picky and why she is so argumentative about it. It is *extremely* difficult to fight what those "critters" do in our brains.

The problem with gluten, even a so-called "mild" reaction is that it's not just going to be a GI reaction (plus chicken skin.) It's also neurological, and that can't always be felt. I personally don't think it even matters to get a diagnosis of Celiac - though to some people, having that label makes it "click" for them that they need to not eat gluten.

It is my hypothesis (gathered from studying, and being in various online groups for food allergies, and our personal experience) that your daughter would eat a higher variety of foods, be less picky, and be less argumentative if her gut was healed. In other words, when you argue with your daughter, chances are that you are not arguing with *her,* who *she* is, but what the gluten/allergens are doing to her (and her brain.) An analogy would be arguing with a drunk person. You would be arguing with the alcohol, not the real person.

At our house, we eat GAPS. When we did this, I knew it was going to be very hard on them. So I told them that even though I have no food reactions at all, that I would do GAPS with them in solidarity. And I do. It is *hard.* But as with most things, it gets easier in time. But this does help. All meals prepared in the house are GAPS meals. DH only eats non GAPS foods outside of the house. (We all love the GAPS food - it's very good!)

I watched my very picky Monkey really open up, and she now eagerly eats and enjoys the GAPS food that I prepare. I even feel stronger and have more energy eating this way. Kitten's acne gets very clear (when she does no fruit and no honey while on GAPS.)

Sometimes, the kids talk about eating non-GAPS. We do take occasional GAPS breaks (like for our cruise, and the hurrication we took for Irma.) I watch Kitten's acne get very severe, and Monkey's anxiety/anger flares. I get bloated. They are both able to observe this.

But, we talk about the future and the kids fantasize about being able to eat junk food whenever they want. (allergy-free junk food!) I tell them this: "When you are an adult, you have to decide for yourself what you are going to put into your body. Hopefully you will know enough to make the right choices. But, while I am responsible for paying for your medical bills, you will eat what I choose for you to eat." They both think this is fair and reasonable.

Re: A question for those who have kids with mild food sensitivities
 

Reading along. My middle child is just exhausting in his quest for anything except fruit,vegetables and good protein. He's six so I'm still mostly in control of his diet but it's not a cooperative,pleasant affair.